I have this problem where.... I like a guy... thats normaly unavailable.. but then if he becomes avaiable and likes me I no longer like him... and this happens to me EVERYTIME... It's very frustrating.. I've read that it sometimes has to do with abandonment issues.. I was abandoned by my dad when I was 11... but does that have anything to do with this I want what I can't have then when I get it I don't want it problem? Is this common also?? Or am I just wierd?? K, thanks for your time.
2006-08-28 08:50:38 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you think you're irritated, try being a guy. Whenever we date someone, temptations abound, and girls give us all sorts of attention. As soon as we free ourselves up, we're nobodies to you.
2006-08-28 08:54:02 · answer #1 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's common, but not necessarily healthy. I'm one of those types as well. I date a girl, everything's fine for awhile and then I'm not interested after a few weeks to a few months. The sex is great, but it dies after awhile. And you are right about the reason why it exists-- abandonment. My parents divorced when I was 17-18 and they never got along. Your abandonment might need to be checked out by a good counselor. But don't think you're wierd or crazy. It's common.
2006-08-28 08:58:27 · answer #2 · answered by IrishGuitar70 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think we all go through this. In fact, salespeople have a name for it: "buyer's remorse." It happens when you buy something like a new car and immediately after decide you don't like it or regret making the purchase. Is this happening to you in just your love life, or with all kinds of decisions you make? If you are feeling this way often, it certainly could be rooted in insecurity brought on by your dad's abandonment. He may have left a big hole in your heart that nothing seems able to fill. I think you should seek professional counseling before it leads to serious unhappiness in your life. Best wishes.
2006-08-28 09:06:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe you don't like my answer. but I think there is something wrong with you.
you know I have seen two more girls having this kind of memory. the had somehow similar problems. because they have been teased by their father and brother they had a very bad feeling toward men. it happend for them, they loved some boys, but they couldn't make a close or personal relationship with them. they said it seems imposoble for them to talerat them in a close relation.
it is not something comen, but it happens sometimes , and it's not you fault at all, but it's your life , if you'd like to fix it, no one can help, only you have the ability.
in psychology they have a chapter about this things, I hope it becomes usefull.
I hop it doesn't bother you, but stop trying to defit men, you'r just hiting yourself.
2006-08-28 10:56:06 · answer #4 · answered by Mehdi ((sade del)) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you do like the thrill of the chase...so do I. Its been that way for me since I was about 13 years old. I dont meet too many men who can handle keeping me on my feet...Im an aquarius and I tend to get very bored when dating men who lack personality.
2006-08-28 08:56:51 · answer #5 · answered by Z. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
been there.It's called High school love triangles. It was fun getting the guys when other girls were going after him but as soon as he was mine I felt the need to break things of and go for another. But after breaking off with someone I really had feelings for I have settled to having guys just pleasure. No more love
2006-08-28 08:54:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is completely normal. it even happens when you're a kid... you want this toy SO BAAAADLY... you get it and what happens to it? you play around with it for a couple of days.... then its stuffed back into the closet with all the other toys you wanted badly. it happened to me with an ex, everytime i knew he was with a new girl it would drive me crazy and make me try harder to get him back... once i got him back... i didn't want him anymore... and this happened repeatedly as well.... its natural... you're not weird, its normal...
2006-08-28 09:14:08 · answer #7 · answered by california 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the first answer to your question is pretty much it. You have that problem and until you fix it you'll be wanting and not getting, getting but not wanting. GET out of that rut now.
2006-08-28 08:56:31 · answer #8 · answered by dave_83501 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Totally normal. Everyone wants what they can't have then when they can have it they don't want it. I think it's an American thing. Greed maybe?
2006-08-28 08:53:41 · answer #9 · answered by .Just.Another.Female. 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think u like the game of it...the chase...u havent found one who can keep u interested. loll i think ur a player..i read an article about this..SAME thing..in a seventeen magazine..u should read it
2006-08-28 08:54:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋