My mom has this incredibly loser boyfriend who abuses her. How do I get rid of him?

Question

He is really a jerk, and a terrible person who lies and cheats. I don't see him much because my mom rarely brings him over while I'm here (she knows i find him to be a vulgar and disagreeable person), but I hate how he treats her. I want to help my mom. I've talked to her time and time again about the way he treats her but she will not take my input no matter how much I plead with her to drop him. He also drinks too much.
Please help me, what can I do about this? How can I make her get rid of him or make them break up?

Answer 1

Make a pass at him and if he bites record it and show it to your mom. make sure u tell someone else so they can back your story up with your mom.

Answer 2

Dear Anneth,
As a family member there are many things you would like to do in order to stop this abusive behavior. But believe me there is nothing you can do but what you have already done to warn your mother of the situation she may not see, nor want to see, because of her emotional involvement with this guy.
As adults we all have to decide for ourselves what is and isn't convenient for us. Sometimes parents drag they're kids into these situstions not to cause them any harm but because the can't or don't want to see the forest for the trees. The only thing you can do now is to continue trying to get your mom to see where you think this relationship is taking her, and consequently you.
If this man ever oversteps his boundries with you, do not hesitate to be the first to take immediate action against him. Do not go to your mother if this happens because she will probably be blinded by her infatuation with this guy but once she sees that you have done something proactive against this turkey she may experience a rude awakening and leave him. If there are other family members involved and depending on their ages, you may have to become the watchdog, so to speak, making sure this fool doesn't do anything or gets away with anything.
When you talk to your mom do not badger her. Try to be as polite and matter-of-fact with her as possible. Do state all the things that bother you about this ralationship without exaggerating. I wish you the best of luck!

Answer 3

First off...you can't really "make them break up". If you try to do something to make them do that you mom will resent you most likely and continue the relationship despite what he does. Yes...unfortunately parents can act like children too. If you live at home with you mom i would like to know how old you are.
Obviously you have tried talking to her and i don't know how you approached her on it, but perhaps you should just sit her down for a good heart to heart. Try talking to her the same way you would want to hear her talking to you if the roles were reversed. If he is as bad as you say...then your mom had self image and self repect issues that sadly aren't going to go away over night.
But just tell her how much it hurts you to see her treated like she is, and also tell her (especially if you are still under age and have to live at home with her) that if you ever see him hurting her that you will call the police and report him.
Or perhaps maybe if it's an option that if she doesn't stop at least bringing this man into the home you have to share with her you will go live with you dad.
But to "try" to do something to make them break up will only cause more heartache between you and your mom. If you are old enough to move out and are able to tell her that you are going to move out.
Whatever you say to her, you have to make her understand that she is better than that and that she deserves better than a drunken boyfriend that treats her like dirt. Make sure she understands that you are concerned for her sake, and even tell her that you fear for your own safety and peace of mind when this guy is around (especially if you have to live at home because of your age).

If this guy does ever hurt your mom at your house and you see it happen...absolutely call the police.
But if she continues to see this man and doesn't listen to your concerns..i would try to make arrangements to live elsewhere, because you don't need to see what is happening..and if she isnt going to change her ways or doesn't want to...then there isn't anything you can really do except for remove yourself from the situation and let her live her life as she is going to. Hopefully she will see this guy for what he really is sooner than later..but if not..you shouldn't have to be exposed to all the crap that i know first hand this kind of relationship can bring.

Answer 4

Call the cops, if that doesn't work, and this will be hard to do but I would have no contact with your mother until it's over with him. Make her realize the importance of what you are talking about. Alternatively call the Alexandria house or another battered women shelter, they will have a lot of resources for you and your mother to escape this @$$. Good luck and be safe.

Answer 5

Some how it all goes hand in hand,. The drinking and then the not so nice person reveals himself. She has to be the person to end it and if you try, it will only get worse for her. Your mother is old enough to know what to do and when to leave him. And if she doesn't she could always email me and I can personally give her more advise, I've been there.

Answer 6

I'm sure your mother knows she is being treated badly and I say she obviously enjoys it and there is nothing you can do about their relationship. I would just make sure I wasn't around when he was around. Your mother will eventually learn the lesson she is going to get by continuing to be involved with a loser.

Answer 7

Forget about him, start working on your mom. If he leaves, your mom will just find someone else to replace him with. Build your mother up, make her feel, and know what she is worth. Contact a domestic violence group in your area and talk with them. They may be able to help directly, or guide you in a direction for help. Don't forget about yourself, your mother is not the only one being mistreated in this situation.

Answer 8

there really is not much you can do if your mother doesnt want your opinion its ok its only an opinon to her now if he gets abusive when your around call the police but remember if you interfere and your mother tells you butt out it will only push your mother further from you and the more you ***** and rag at her the more she will look at your opionion as bad advice sit back quietly and just be there for her when she needs you sorry this is not what you wanted to hear

Answer 9

You can't do anything to break them up. Your mom has to be the one to break it off and get rid of him. The only thing you can do is talk to her and be there for her and hope she opens her eyes soon. She is a grown woman and she has to put her foot down and realize that he is no good and he is just using her and making her life miserable.

Answer 10

ok heres what you got to do, it may be a little tough but it will work.
first get drunk with him then talk him into going to bed with you, at this point dont let your mom know. get video and pics get real freaky with him. call the springer show send them the tapes next nvite her as a suprise guest while you expose him on "help my moms boyfriend boinked me" sit back and let the show work its magic

Answer 11

you ought to get some expert and criminal help. there are 1000's of hotlines to call that should assist you privately with abuse, exceedingly something that the kin is hardship-free with of. it is not something you ought to ought to circulate by. communicate on your college councelor, they help lots and you will ask for the law enforcement officers to no longer be in touch yet why wouldnt you elect for the law enforcement officers in touch. to your mom, she shouldnt enable no guy cope together with her infants that way inspite of money, there are countless the type to get tips with paying expenses.