i got abused when i was younger bc i would try to save my sister from dying and i would feed her and take care of her but for some reason i would stand in front of her when they tried to hit her and i ended up getting beat but if i wouldnt have done that she proly would be alive today but do u think that messes with my head as i got older i am 17 and my sister is 13 but i really need some adivce i have been to therapy and everything but nothin seems to work some one plz help me out
2006-08-28 06:25:11 · 16 answers · asked by chris 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Hmmm? Sounds like I need more information. Whoever they were? You probably have head injuries. It's not your fault that your sister died. There were probably things you didn't know about. Whomever was doing the hitting probably learned it from their parents or some other significant adult figure. If it was a parent, learn the abuse stops here. The control and reactions stop here. Learn to forgive yourself.
Treat any medical condition. Other things you can do is learn tae kwan do, yoga or tia chi. Learn meditation. These will help you learn to relax and give you inner peace of mind. You're going to therapy and hopefully a support group. Healing doesn't happen overnight.
If you need to talk, contact me, I'll help you.
2006-09-03 16:15:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was abused when I was younger. But I was only protecting myself. I look at it this way. That's the way my parents treated me and I'll never treat anyone like that. I try to look at things that are traumatic in a positive aspect. I am who I am today because I am stronger. I can avoid bad situations because I know the signs. I know I'll never treat anyone the way I was treated. You are justified for standing up for your sister. Your parents on the other hand had no right. They're the ones that need to go to therapy. I dealt with abuse till i was 17 and I'm 20 now and on my own. I did it! I am out and healthy and working. What is it that you are doing now? Are you in school? Do you play sports? Find a hobbie to keep you occupied or helps take out your aggression, if you have any. Watch out for relationships in the future. We all tend to find someone like our parents to have a relationship with. Just because you took the abuse when you were young, does mean you have to take it for the rest of your life.
2006-08-28 06:48:18 · answer #2 · answered by kablaow 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Are you safe now? If you are in therapy, I am assuming you and your sister were saved from an abusive home.
I am so sorry this happened to you. I do not know why some people have to treat their children like that. You are very brave to try to protect your sister. That is something to be proud of.
I know you think nothing is helping now, but please continue with therapy. You are at a tough age anyway, but some help you get now may help in later years.
The best of luck to you. You sound like a very courageous person, I wish I could meet you.
2006-09-05 05:52:36 · answer #3 · answered by Patti C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My hat goes of to you i think it would've been a really brave thing for you to do protecting your sister like that and looking after her. Of course its gonna mess with your head taking a beating for doing what you felt was right. The person/persons responsible for beating you should be condemned for what they did to you. No child should go through what you have been through. I am a mother of 5 and i would never dream of even raising my hand to any of my kids, never mind beat them. My heart goes out to you!! Remember time is a great healer and you will learn to forget and move on with the rest of your life you've done well so far just take each day as it comes
2006-09-05 01:51:22 · answer #4 · answered by kelly j 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't agree with some of the posting in here... reliving your experience is what you are doing.now. It helps nothing. The emotions you have implanted and stored in your mind, become the triggers which cause you to think or react to things you normally would not do. When you release those triggers, the memories will become much less pronounced, and have much less influence on your life. You have a conflict of being the hero and the victim. At the same time. Can email me if interested.
2006-09-04 05:45:57 · answer #5 · answered by mrcricket1932 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used 2 get beat all the time by my parents, so now im living in a hostel at 17, but I have the best life ever. When i think about i get upset, but theres nothing i can do about that. My brother is disabled and he gets beat, if he didn't get care he wouldn't be alive now. Well my point is life isn't fair, but i now have the best life ever!
2006-09-03 07:18:51 · answer #6 · answered by Shanni 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i am sorry that u and your sister went through that,i know how it is living in an abusive situation,it takes years sometimes to get over it.I would suggest going back to counseling,u need to be able to vent,it will take time,but hopefully you will find a good counselor who will help you and your sister. You are a good person for standing up for your sister and I'm sure she loves you alot.Take care of yourself and your sister.Please get the help you need, are u still in the abusive situation?if you are you should really tell someone you can trust.Take care,i will be praying for you and her.
2006-09-04 04:12:20 · answer #7 · answered by annie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it takes a long time to work thru the horrors of being abused i applaudd you for seeking help don't give up if the therapist that you are seeing isn't helping you need to get refered to another one, also is your sister in therapy i'm sure she is probally reliving alot of the trauma too. don't quit and one day you will feel better and knowing that you probbally did save your sisters life is something positive in your life. god bless!!
2006-09-05 02:45:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats a huge one, but not huge enough to get over with.
It aint a big deal , many guys all over the world do have similar fate,
from my perspective , the easy way out is to forgive who ever subjected you and your sis to the heinous abuses, wish them well and Believe in the best in life for you and for your sister.
Another Remedy and i know its readily available is to assist any one in your community who you know or believe is undergoing similar condition of abuse it will heal u too.
I can see you and your sister are still at a tender age (13 & 17?),so ensure you dont live with this mess up in your mind. shrugg it off.
I wish you a peaceful life.
2006-09-05 03:34:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
God bless you 1st of all.You are very brave to protect your sister like that. You did that because you love her and you are a loving person.Please do not let what your parents are become you as you grow up. I believe that tho we grow up in a bad home we are what we make of it. When you marry and have children I know you will be the best parent ever.Continue in your counseling and grow to be the best you can be. remember only you can keep yourself down.Learn from your past and do not live in it.
2006-09-04 15:27:25 · answer #10 · answered by kitkat19582002 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋