Planning a cocktails wedding!?

Question

In my opinion, I feel that the overpriced weddings of today are ridiculous! I want my wedding to be a party and for everyone to have fun and remember it as a celebration and a great time! I want my bridesmaids to wear cute shoes they'll love and fun dresses they can wear again. However, there's always the issue of how to go about this and I would love suggestions! I was thinking of having a later ceremony, around 7 or 8pm, and then a reception involving an open bar and appetizers and dancing and mingling with all the guests instead of sitting tucked away in a corner. We could still have all the traditions: first dance, receiving line, best man speech, all that. I think a huge sit-down 5 course meal is silly and a waste of money. I'd rather spend the money on a fabulous honeymoon! Is this something people do? Where would a good place be? Any ideas? Suggestions? Concerns? Thanks in advance!

Answer 1

Great idea....I wished more brides would do something similar. All that money for all that pomp, and I would rather see their pictures of their fabulous honeymoon....

Country club.....have it all in one place. If the room is large enough have the tables to the back or sides. When make rows of chairs to your "alter" after the cermoney just move back the chairs to the tables. At my daughter's wedding, we did this, the rental co. overbooked chairs, so we had to use the same chairs for both....saved on the rental...lol $300. and the groomsmen moved the chairs for me after the I do's. Place artifical trees around the room, after running lights in them. When the service is over, you can flip on the lights for a more fun feel. You have a buffet, and let people mingle and sit where they want. No sitting charts, no place cards...more money for suntan lotion...

Serve a sampling of fingerfoods, that are easy to fix, and less costly, and people much rather have cocktail sausage than a peice of dry fish anyway...or rubber chicken..Most fingerfood can be done before hand, or put in a crock pot. Or spend the money on a catrer, but you are going to be saving oodles by having the vegetable tray then roast brocilli served with a light sauce. Believe me I know....I did this for a living at one time..Spicy hot wings are the rage now...

An open bar is a big expense, you could always cut it down to certain drinks, and a champagne punch. Don't forget a nice punch for us non-drinkers....

Now, you are a member of a church you could have the cermoney there, and then rent a room in a resturant or a hotel.
There's all kind of possibilities.....Again I think it's a great idea, and I can tell you from experience the guests will love you for it.
It's time to party, you just married the man of your dreams, and instead of sitting at a table with the over baked and over priced meal that you can't seem to choke down....you are in the arms of your new husband, laughing, talking, kissing, and just having a good time.......

Save the money for souveniors! Buy yourself a extra day in paradise....you will remember it a lot more than what the food tasted like......

Have the best time, honey, you are thinking right, and from all your quests a BIG THANK YOU!!!

God bless us all........................


for my last wedding that I did professionally. I ran lights to the middle of the room, I used purple(her color) and had a set of wedding bells in the middle....what the bride didn't know was they were covering up a small disco ball....I had the bells rigged to come off with a string. took some doing but when I flipped the switch it was worth all the trying to figure out how to do it when I saw the bride's face.....which happens to be my best friend....She danced under her starry purple sky with the bells for their first dance, but then she wanted to party, so I pulled the string and honey, the party started...just wanted she wanted...a celebration with laughs and plenty of fun.........

Answer 2

I'm with you on the overpriced weddings. Depending on your age and the ages of your guests, there is a wide variety of what you can do to have a wedding without all the expense and angst. You have to let go of the idea of ultra-traditional, though.

And I'm all for that...

When I was younger, I wanted to have a summer wedding on the beach - with a volleyball party afterwards, complete with watermelon and sandwiches. When I was older, the idea was to have a country picnic, complete with softball, three-legged races, and a wedding ceremony under a flowered trellis. Bottom line, you can have whatever suits your fancy, if you do it right.

If you want to have an outdoor wedding, by the way, you can let Mother Nature take care of the decorations and that cuts ALOT of the cost.

Anyway, if you have an evening wedding - which was also an idea of mine - you can have your ceremony lit only by candles for a beautiful look - just make sure your photographers are prepared for such low light. I like the idea of letting your bridesmaids have more free rein on their apparel ...just be careful that your wedding party might then look like a mish-mash. It's just an idea, but if you are having an evening wedding, you could have your bridesmaids wear a little black dress - anything they want, except it has to be black. Thenyou tell them that they need to add a 7-8 foot scarf/drape to it of any solid color they want and any shoes they want (which means their shoes can be black or they can match the drape they choose!)

I like the idea of the open bar and appetizers, but remember if you have an evening wedding, then you will have people who will have forgone dinner and will be expecting "heavy hors de overs" - appetizers with enough substance to stanch the hunger pangs and to allow them to have a drink or two and not get too affected. Remember these people will be driving away from your reception!

Can't give you any ideas on a place - don't know where you are - but I wish you the best of luck!

Answer 3

I'm with you, I'm doing a very simple and informal reception for my wedding. I would just make sure that you put down on your invites that it's a cocktail style reception, or even a dessert one if you want that route. And I would have some type of seating arrangement, doesn't have to be formal you could do little groupings around coffee tables (big enough to hold drinks) and keep it open and flowing. If you are having an open bar, that might get on the pricey side, so I would limit the types of alcohol, you could do a signature drink (ie cosmopolitians,mai tai, etc) and then offer beer and wine. This will keep the tab for you down especially if your wanting money for the honeymoon. Also if your trying to save money on costs, keep in mind that unless your doing it yourself that cocktail receptions are becoming popular and the pricing may come out the same as the sit down dinner, so definitely shop around on that as well. And for the bridesmaids, you may want to all go and pick out dresses together instead of sending them on their own. Usually stores like Macy's, Dillards etc have cocktail style dresses that are formal enough to wear in a wedding and can definitely be worn out again, and shoes are very easy if you decide on them all getting the same color. And I will admit that the best receptions that I have ever been too are the less formal ones..they are more relaxed!! Congrats and enjoy!!

Answer 4

The best wedding I ever went to was like that. They rented a local hall, decorated it with potted trees and lights, and had cocktails and appetizers served all night. They had a DJ, and also some friends who were local musicians to liven things up as well. There were tables and chairs, but everyone was milling around and mingling, and were happy to watch or participate in all of the traditional stuff, too.
Side note:his brother had a big, obnoxious, stuffy wedding and reception a month later. Guess whose marriage was annulled a month later?

Answer 5

My girlfriend's wedding was very similar. They had an outdoor wedding at sunset (invitiations for 7) on the lake - Then the reception was held in a cottage that was built exclusively for weddings. Her gown was a very simple but very elegant flowing gown with Austrian crystal straps and draping neckline. Her attendants all wore different styles of skirts and tops of the same color.
She hired a couple of waiters who walked around carrying trays of appetizers (both hot and cold). The hired an awesome DJ who kept the party lively but not over the top. I was much more impressed with the ambiance of her wedding than the more formal sit-down or buffet. As a guest - I would say - "You go girl"!!

Answer 6

I think it's a great idea to cut costs by not having a meal reception, however-- I have to warn you that in most cases, serving a simple dinner and serving hors d'oevures are going to cost about the same, because assembling hors d'oevures is very labor-intensive for a caterer. So you may not actually come out ahead, money-wise, over just serving a simple wedding dinner.

If your ceremony and reception will be that late, what about just a cake-and-champagne dessert reception? Just an idea.

Answer 7

It's a wonderful idea. I've been to a couple of wedding like the one you are planning, and I had a better time at them than some of the formal sit downs I've been to.

You might want to think about starting earlier, say a 6PM ceremony so that guests can have plenty of time to party if they had to get home early for something the next morning (like church, work, etc...)

A great place for dress searches and ideas for both you and your maids.
http://www.bridesave.com

Some good places to look for locations in your area:
http://www.weddingchannel.com
http://www.theknot.com
http://www.ultimatewedding.com

Maybe have an cash bar instead of an open one. You don't want to spend money on other people's alcohol if you are trying to save for the honeymoon and other more important things.

Answer 8

Everything you've described is completely okay. The only thing you need to make sure of is that the guests do not expect a meal. Unless they are told otherwise, all of your guests will come hungry and come expecting that five course meal; then, you'll have angry, cranky guests.

On the invitation, or reception card if you're having one, just put "Cocktail reception to follow." That way, they'll know they aren't getting dinner and will eat before they come.

Answer 9

While your friends may think this is a great idea - you older (and elder) relatives will not. You must have some type of table/seating available.

You should also make it well know that this will not be a meal - and that they should mostlikely eat prior or anticipate that food will be passed/apps.

If your crowd is a drinking crowd - you really have to feed them. Too often in these types of events - the drinkers drink and eat very little (if any) food. You'll end up with some sloppy guests.

Answer 10

Hey this sounds great! My wedding was very simple and all we had was veggie trays, meat trays, fruit trays, drinks and the cake. My wedding was in the middle of the day and the ceremony and reception only lasted about 2 hours, then we were off on our honeymoon.

Its your day, make it special!