How do you respond or react when you are visiting a church that has customs that are unfamiliar to you?

Question

When visiting a new church, how do you respond to the service when it is different than your own? Do you sit back and observe and try and sing the songs even if you do not know the tune or do you sit and observe how they do things?
How do you respond to the service if something in the service: music, sermon, etc - does NOT move you? Do you fake it or do you remain true to yourself?
Is there a right way or wrong way to behave when visiting a new church? If so, describe.
Thanks for answering!

Answer 1

You follow along according to your morals and feelings. YOu can try to learn and sing along witht the hyms. BUt if you are not feeling the service dont fake the funk, just dont go again!

Answer 2

Great question!

I'm a Pagan (raised Lutheran, FWIW), so visiting other people in their faith communities and seeing how they communicate with their deities is not a worry-making problem for me. On the rare occasions where people have given me the fishy stare of "WHY aren't you doing X?" (I'm usually sitting quietly, with a cheerful and interested look on my face), I just give them a nice smile and nod back. They don't know WHAT to think of it!)

But if really concerned about "fitting in", or didn't want to risk rocking the boat (say, I had an elderly relative that didn't know I was Pagan)....best bet, if you're a complete stranger?
Sit near the last few rows of the church (but not the extreme back) and watch a lot. Kneel with the crowd if you're comfortable doing that, otherwise stay seated. Go with the flow---prayers and hymns, etc.---if you feel OK with it; otherwise, I'd just stay put and awake, as an attentive and unobtrusive listener.
If there's something that really startles or offends you, slip out quietly when you get a chance. You're entitled to your own personal religious beliefs and you can be true to them, but the people of the congregation have their earnestly-held ones, also---and this is NOT the time and place for a Big Conniption Fit and StalkOut. I think the Christians have a saying about judging....

Answer 3

When I attended Mass at my daughter's Catholic school, I tried to keep an eye on someone and do what they did. Out of respect. When I moved to a new town I visited maybe 6 churches I thought I could make my new church home. I saw some strange stuff. Mostly I responded by giving side glances to my husband which meant, "ehhh! this isn't the one." Once we got up and left politely. Believe me it was highly warranted. The other times we sat there reading our bibles, OR repectfully observing and leaving when we were all dismissed. I think the most important thing is that you TEST THE SPIRIT BY THE SPIRIT and what lives inside of you, the spirit on the inside makes intercession and confirmation in your spirit about the right thing to do, so I always follow the lead of the HOLY GHOST.
Great question! Peace. (I am a Baptist by the way)

Answer 4

This has happened to me too. I was not raised under any religion, so I had to find my own way. That ment a lot of different churches, and plenty of these moments. I just smiled and clapped along with the songs. I did not participate in anything that made me uncomfy. Be true to yourself! But don't say anything offensive to the people in the church. If you have questions about why they do something different, wait until after the service and ask the pastor/priest ect. Usually you will find they are more than happy to explain things to you!

Answer 5

***How do you respond or react when you are visiting a church that has customs that are unfamiliar to you?****

If i told the truth, I'd say i usually keep smiling and saying hello.I probably look like a deer in the headlights. I do what the other folks do, in an attempt to not standout too much. Visit other congregations to see what goes on, it's an eye opener for sure and you'll meet some great folks.

Answer 6

I attended a friend's church for one sunday and I strongly disliked it.
It was a southern baptist church, and the enviroment was horrible. Everyone was acting suspicious of me, as if I were a threat to them or something. The service was confusing, and the "pastor" as they called it was hard to understand what he was saying. I acted like I was interested into what he was saying, just because I didn't want my friend to know.
Honestly I hated it. I've never visited another church other than my own.

Answer 7

MAN, this one KNOCKED ME OUT! Maybe you are like me.
I'm a quiet, reserved type of person. Personally, I have no
problem with charismatic services. But come charismatics treat
me as if I'm a creep because I'm not jumping up and down too.
Very difficult situation.
Scripture does tell us to respect the customs of others. As long
as we try to be informed, and show respect. We shouldn't
worry about how others react. I know, sooner said than done!

Answer 8

Hi. I love your quetion because i ve been there.
When visiting a new church,the best way to respond is actually dependind on the leading of the Holy Spirit,because the bible said..."he will lead you into all truth"
If you have the leading then just let go ,and flow . God bless you.

Answer 9

I often visit other churches. I usually get involved & participate to the best of my abilities. I'm not offended or put - off by odd or
strange rituals. I accept them for what they are. It doesn't affect
my ability to worship in my own way. Nor do I put others down.

Answer 10

Keep your mouth shut, just humm along to the songs, and watch what everyone else does. If you are in their house follow their rules as a courtesy, you would expect it from them in your church.