My ex and I are 20 have been broken up for a few months now. i wanted to end things because i couldnt give her what she wanted/deserved at the time because i was working two jobs, going to school, and about to take two summer classes. I'm back to working one job and school is going to be easier this year and i know i can give her everything she can ever dream of. We've been talking for a few weeks now and i told her how i felt about her but she is stuck on how she needs to be single right now to figure things out and school/basketball are going to be tough for her this coming year. She says she still loves me and still has the same feelings for me as before, but she cant be in a relationship right now. I feel like the only reason she is saying that is because she's just scared to be hurt again. am i right?. Why won't she open her heart to me again and give me that chance to make her the happiest girl again?
2006-08-27 19:06:54 · 14 answers · asked by whoa 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
cuz u the one who broke up w/ her in the first place or she might not feel safe begin w/ u 4 now cuz who know what will happen u might broke her heart again
2006-08-27 19:14:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She was hurt by you and when someone goes through an experience where they are hurt they change a little bit. She has learned what it is like to be independent, and maybe she wants to explore that further. Also, I totally agree that she is probably scared to get hurt by you again. The only thing I can suggest is that you explain everything to her with an open heart and see what happens. She might just need some time to think about things.
2006-08-27 19:14:44 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, so you break up with her because you are feeling insecure and that you can't give her what she wants. Ummm, she wasn't complaining was she? So you leave her and now things are easy and boom you want to get back together? Give her time. She needs to figure things out on her own and be her own person. at 20 you are JUST getting started on that path. It takes a while to figure out all the details. There is so much out there to experience!
don't smother or annoy, give her space and support and see where you end up. Leaving it open right now seems like a good idea. You don't yet understand the size and extent of your fishbowl...
2006-08-27 19:12:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's always the hardest to get over the one that got away. If she wants to be on her own for a while then let her, you can't be desperate that will never get her back, just live your life and live it well, you have to let her realize how much you mean to her. Plenty of fish in the sea, time heals everything. Bottom line is: nothing you do now really makes a difference, so just start dating again, it will help you get over her.
EDIT:
P.S. and I gotta say this, even if she comes to you, I doubt you will be able to really cherish her. First of all, you are too young. Second of all, it's too easy.
2006-08-27 19:13:20 · answer #4 · answered by Xens 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well obviously she wasn't the happiest girl before or you wouldn't be asking this question or having these troubles. It was ok for you to end the relationship when you were busy but when she offers the same reasons not to get back together, it comes as a surprise?! That is hypocritical, consider her denial poetic justice.
2006-08-27 19:22:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she just doesnt want to go out with you anymore and she is just telling you the nice way so she doesnt hurt your feelings. I dont know the girl but maybe she really just doesnt want a realtionship right now. There are plenty of explanations
2006-08-27 19:30:03 · answer #6 · answered by Joe123 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you should understand that she's busy now and wants the best for you too. i don't think she was hurt from the break up since you explained to her why and apparently you two still talk. just give her some time, and when she's ready to be with you again, she will.
2006-08-27 19:12:03 · answer #7 · answered by mymymissmai 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WELL, OF COURSE SHE FEELS LIKE YOU'RE JUST PICKING HER UP WHENEVER YOU FEEL LIKE IT...YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND AND RESPECT HER FEELINGS TOO. I COMMEND YOU FOR BEING FOCUSED AND TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS FIRST, HOWEVER, WHEN YOU'RE IN A RELATIONSHIP, IT INVOLVES TWO PEOPLE, NOT JUST YOU! THE WORLD AND NOTHING IN IT REVOLVES AROUND YOU...AT THIS POINT, YOU NEED TO GIVE HER THE SAME RESPECT THAT SHE GAVE YOU AND ALLOW HER TO THINK THINGS OVER...I HAVE NO DOUBT THAT SHE STILL LOVES YOU, BUT I'M THINKING LIKE HER, ARE YOU GOING TO DUMP ME WHEN THE NEXT SEMESTER ROLLS AROUND?
2006-08-27 19:13:09 · answer #8 · answered by CHASE_ME 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course she is scared to be hurt i mean everyone is scared to get hurt by someone they love.....the advice i can give to u is to be patient i feel if u too are meant to be then u will be....just give it a little time
2006-08-27 19:11:01 · answer #9 · answered by Theresa J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you will eventually get over it. everyone is different and some take longer than others. these are all learning experiences in life. read more on dating and relationships on this site
2006-08-27 19:17:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋