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i've talked to this girl for a long time now...and she really liked me and i really liked her too. but i felt it too much. i was too into her. but i didn't know that she wasn't ready for me. so i confronted her...and i ask her where we were at? like are we friends or are we together. and she told me that she should get to know me better. but i don't understand....we talked alot and we give each other little kisses and everything. until now....i know that she feels weird and shocked. and i can't flirt with her without having this weird feelin with me. this girl never used me like most of the other girls i've met in my life. and i kno i did a stupid mistake....wut do you think i should do?

any ideas or tips? please...

2006-08-27 19:02:44 · 12 answers · asked by =D 2 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

12 answers

If you feel she's worth it, take the necessary time needed to allow the relationship to grow. You've made the right move! You asked and now you know where she stands. Now you can work with that and not have to beat yourself up everyday guessing. Sounds like a person of good moral character. Wants to take her time and be sure. This is much better than rushing into something only to find out later it was a mistake. Allow her the time she needs for her decision by not pressuring her. She will admire and respect you for it.

2006-08-27 19:09:29 · answer #1 · answered by Big "D" 2 · 0 0

Hunny the trick in any relationship - whether it be friendship, love, whatever - don't look too far into the future. Take each day as it comes. It's natural to dream about what might be but at the same time don't put too much pressure on her, and on yourself - try and hold yourself back a bit on the hoping and dreaming. From what you've said I can't really figure out why you feel stupid though? If you've been cuddling and kissing etc then what you asked her is a normal question. I was in love with a guy for 5 years - we'd done a bit of flirting and cuddling but he was a moody bugger. It took me ages to get up the guts to tell him how I felt. His answer? F**k off idiot. Now THAT"S feeling stupid!!! I didn't talk to him for a year and now we are great friends but we have never spoken about what i said. I have no romantic feelings toward him now!! Maybe you could apologise to this girl for making her feel uncomfortable and then that would open an opportunity for you both to talk about it. There's nothing wrong with her saying that she wants to get to know you better. By the sound of it that's what you were both doing anyway - taking it slowly and letting it develop naturally. If you really like her than I personally think trying to talk to her again is worth it. You will feel better letting her know you feel like a twit!! Maybe she feels weird because you're acting different towards her now? (because you feel silly, the way you act with her will be different) There is nothing wrong with communication and you need to know where you stand for your own sanity. Apologising will let her know you feel like a silly twit and some girls like a bit of vulnerability in their men! I always reckon its better to ask something and get it out of your system than spending the next 5 years wondering what could have been if you'd gotten up the guts to ask! Best of luck and for the record - if she's cuddling and kissing you back then there are some feelings there on her part! :)

2006-08-27 19:37:53 · answer #2 · answered by ellyfantastic 2 · 0 0

What can you do? Try to restore a certain amount of normalness back into your relationship with her. Make sure you two can hang out and talk without either of you feeling awkward at this point. Maybe during that time she might be 'ready' for you. There's always the possibility that she doesn't look at you as more than a friend. I'm not suggesting that's what's going on. Only saying it's possible. What else is there to do beyond that? If you try to advance things again too soon, it'll just push her away. So just try to go back to the way things were and swallow your feelings for her for now.

2006-08-27 19:06:45 · answer #3 · answered by Olivia B 6 · 1 0

I think she just felt overwhelmed and so you need to respect her space. Very few people like being smothered and perhaps that is how she feels. Give her space but once in a while say hi and compliment her. If she is still shocked or acts wierd, then give her more space and be a little distant (not being a jerk distant) just mellow and smile when you see her. Wait until she comes to you and says hi or invites you to do something. If she doesn't then move on as you can. Work on yourself and enjoy being who you are and hanging out with your friends. People of the opposite sex will come and go through your life. You need to keep occupied and interested ultimately in what you are doing!

2006-08-27 19:08:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

The clue is when you say you feel like you are dying inside.
You are internalizing it way too much. It is a part of the life learning process, but to hold onto those feelings isn't healthy. Carry on offering your friendship,respect and appreciation of her as a woman. Flirt with her in the nicest of ways, slightly sexual but lightly.
Most of all convince yourself that you didn't do anything foolish or that you should be embarrassed about. You sound like a nice guy and one that she will be proud to be seen with and that is all that counts!

2006-08-27 19:20:53 · answer #5 · answered by Christine H 7 · 0 0

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2016-11-05 22:34:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

First of all you didnt do anything stupid. If the girl cared and liked u so much she wouldnt of said she needed to get to know you better. To me I would find someone else she will come around once she sees she has messed up by being a lil tease

2006-08-27 19:22:40 · answer #7 · answered by meme 2 · 0 0

Try to give her a little space. Try not to give her so much space that she thinks you aren't interested anymore though. next time you see her, apologize for being so forward, let her know that you didn't mean to shock her but you just couldn't contain your feelings for her anymore! Tell her that if she needs some space then you are more than willing to do that for her. be patient. she likes you too it sounds like and things will happen in their own time! Good Luck :)

2006-08-27 19:11:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I don't think you did anything stupid,maybe you just miss read the signals she was giving.Keep seeing her, and since she wants to get to know you better,asks her out to a movie and a burger after the show.Keep seeing her and just wait until shes ready to become a couple.Things will work out for you.It just takes time.

Clowmy

2006-08-27 19:12:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

i mean i know what ur goin through i had a guy just like u in my life and i feel that u should just take it slow if u needs more time she needs more time.....she may have been hurt before and she wants to be careful, or u can talk to her and ask about that there may be a reson as to why she said what she said

2006-08-27 19:07:15 · answer #10 · answered by Theresa J 3 · 1 0

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