My boyfriend's ex girlfriend asked him to help her in moving out. Me and my boyfriend are just starting a relationship. Should I trust him? It's his only day off this week and he chose to help his ex instead of being with me. he left me a message to let me know but I have not returned his call...It's been over half day, he has not called me up again...should i be botehred?
2006-08-27 18:01:47 · 31 answers · asked by hayley 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It would be completly normal to be bothered..
But, return his phone call. The longer you wait to do it, the more bothered your going to be.
2006-08-27 18:04:33 · answer #1 · answered by Montello43 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Do not listen to anyone who says oh you should just trust him. If it were their bf or gf they would be pissed as hell. He obviously is not over his ex-girlfriend. And then he had the audacity to help her move on the only day he had off when he should have been spending time with you? He is s***. That is the exact reason why I choose to ignore the advances of men and be single, b/c they do stupid things like that. Do not return his call. Make yourself busy with other things. He is wrong. He has not even called you again. If you were important to him he would make more of an effort to call you back. I would be so angry with him. How dare he do something like that to you. Do not call him at all. Make him chase you. Then when you feel ready to talk to him. listen to what he has to say and then tell him it is over. That is totally disrespectful what he did. He had no right to do that to you. He probably had sex with her. Why couldn't she get off her lazy a** and call someone to help her move. What is he the only person on earth that she knows? You may trust him, but he and her have a history together. You never know what happened. DO NOT TRUST HIM. TRUST IS EARNED. Men are such dogs.
2006-08-27 18:14:23 · answer #2 · answered by Tonya 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's perfectly natural to be uneasy about this. Even though things are new between the two of you, you're going to have to trust him. It's better this way anyways. Find out right away what kind of guy he is. The fact that he's helping his ex move instead of hanging out with you doesn't mean he 'chose' his ex over you, it just means he's trying to help her out probably. Now if this was something that happend all the time, you'd have every right to talk to him about it and say you think it's inappropriate. Just try to deal with it for now and see how things go as time goes on. And call him up, no need to do the whole 'silent treatment' thing about this.
2006-08-27 18:06:26 · answer #3 · answered by Olivia B 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sort of depends on why their relationship ended, how long they were in that relationship and what his ties to her are. You mentioned that you just started this relationship with him, it might be best to find out this information. It strikes me as odd that he would opt to help her move, but I'm not convinced that there is going to be something going on. I've seen a lot of relationships fizzle and develop into friendships without anything funny going on....this could be the case.
Do the right thing and call him back, explain to him that you are a little apprehensive about him helping her move and see what he says. If he gets all defensive and combative, dump him..there is still something going on. If he takes the time to explain it to you, chances are he'd have no reason to lie. I guess it all comes down to how much you trust this guy.
Go call him honey, you are entitled to truth so you can put your heart as ease.
2006-08-27 18:08:34 · answer #4 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all..You should call him..Tell him that you are alittle uncomfortable with him spending time with his ex..If he has not helped her move yet..Ask if you could help..Just to see his reaction to your question..If you have had problems with men cheating in the past..You might have trust issues either way..Call while he is helping her move..See if he answers..If you get a gut feeling though..And you just feel like you are being played..The feeling is most likely right..Although, if you are first starting off a realationship with him..Don't you think he should be spending his off day with you? Helping her or not...Think on this question too..How long did that date?
2006-08-27 18:12:25 · answer #5 · answered by Don't Judge me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you have to both lay down ground rules for this relationship. If you are not comfortable with him being friends with his ex's then let him know. But be prepared to stop dealing with your ex's. Now if he jumps off the cliff because of your conversation then something is up. I am a firm believer that if sex was involved with the ex then the ex must be out of the picture.
2006-08-27 18:07:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i hope your not the type that would get a fox to guard the hen house. of course you can't trust both of them together. there are some things that no man can resist. if they were together for any length of time she knows what that is. I would not show signs of jealousy or "call to check up on him". if he really loves you he will be back. if not, he wasn't yours to begin with. if you show signs of jealousy and distrust you will alienate him if he did nothing. if he did revisit his feelings for her and you press the issue you may drive him away. the only question is are you happier with or without him. if he makes you happy and you make him happy you have nothing to worry about. if you would be happier without him then why do you care? Be mature and realize that if he did it, it was only sex. when he does come to you make love to him like he has never had it before and he will be yours forever.
2006-08-27 18:16:23 · answer #7 · answered by handyman5218 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, it is a little early in your relationship, but if you don't trust him now, you never will.
Wait, see how he reacts/acts toward you later after he helps her move and see if the ex needs any more help and see how he reacts to that.
2006-08-27 18:11:40 · answer #8 · answered by Road Warrior 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh wow. you were in the same problem like me ! what i did was just say that i let him because i tried to trust him. since you're starting your relationship, you'll always feel left out & feelings that will make you worry like hell ! but yeah, try to trust him & take my advice, let him go because he will feel upset & bad that you don't trust him or let him hang out with an ex or a GIRL friend,.
2006-08-27 18:06:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would definately be bothered, however, whatever will be will be, if I were you I would be going out tonight and try not to think about it. I definately wouldn't let him see me upset. Insecurity is a turn off, just wait and see what happens. If he comes home to you, then show him how much you appretiate him and how badly you truely want to be with him.
2006-08-27 18:14:44 · answer #10 · answered by Tammy C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I had a gf, it would bother me. Of course that's me. If I were a good guy, then I would have stayed with my present gf. If I were not, and expecting something in return, *wink* then I might go help my ex.
2006-08-27 18:12:52 · answer #11 · answered by Dr Love 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋