I've been through therapy now and know i'm not crazy or at fault, but am having trouble finding someone to be with.
2006-08-27 15:13:43 · 23 answers · asked by snogfacetx 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
so far most of these are very good answers, thank you for your interest, i'm considering all the advice with earnest. Thanks!
2006-08-27 15:30:14 · update #1
no. you needed out of those relationsships.. i still love you. it's okay. and so does your husband. right?
2006-08-27 15:16:55 · answer #1 · answered by Kitten 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you've been through therapy, then you know you're somewhat responsible for everything in your life. We all make choices that alter our lives. Being married three times doesn't make you a loser, nor does having been physically abused by two husbands. The only way you'd be a loser is if you didn't change at all in spite of your hard time. It may take you a long time to understand and get along with yourself alone.... Be by yourself for a while, learn what you're like, what you want in life, let it get grounded in pretty good. Then you'll do the kinds of things that will lead the right kind of guy to you. So relax for now, enjoy the alone time. Good luck.
2006-08-27 22:23:11 · answer #2 · answered by *babydoll* 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are n ot a loser, You have made some bad judgements perhaps.
I am glad you have had therapy to help you come to terms with the abuse of two husbands.
Don't be in a hurry to get into a relationship. Be careful with your heart and soul.
Guard your heart. When you meet someone who you would like to get to know better, do just that, get to know him really well before you do more than hold hands, kiss etc. You don't have to give your total history, just explain that you have been hurt and are not wanting to rush into anything. That you need time and need to take things slowly. A decent man will respect your reserve, will honor your decision.
Too many people think that because they have shared body fluids they are in a "relationship" They think that they have to have sex to hold a person's intrests. This is a big mistake! Your body is sacred, treat yourself as if you are precous and so will others. If a mam can't find value in your company without having to share your bed, he is not worth the time and effort. Don 't accept less than God's best, ever!
2006-08-27 22:27:19 · answer #3 · answered by Christine M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having three husbands is like having three boyfriends is nothing defferent but a signature on paper all you need to do is find an other boy friend and do not sign any papers until you know is the right one you can live with him yea why not but you have to get to know that person for aleast two more years from the day you had sex with him in order for you to know if that person will ever change....or he will stay the same as when you met him, that way you will avoid anymore abuse because some guys think that they own their wifes just because they signed a pice of paper a real man will love you not abuse you...well not if you start to abuse him first i am not saying that is the case.....
2006-08-27 22:25:55 · answer #4 · answered by Latin Lover 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being married 3 times does not make you a loser, just someone who keeps making the same wrong choices. You sound like a victim to people who can take advantage of you. I know because I have been in the same boat. You need to realize who you are and that you are someone who deserves respect and will not tolerate anything but that. Stay strong and tell whoever does not respect you to get the hell out.
2006-08-27 22:19:47 · answer #5 · answered by JJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not a Loser. I may not be the most expierenced at life,but from what i've been through recently. LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES!!! Never doubt yourself. There are so many lessons to learn in life that you think you know already, perhaps a good person from a bad one. Just hang in there and always listen to your heart and be careful to whom you give it to :) . Married 3 times? You just hit rock bottom more than once. When you get hit the getting up is up to you. Always forward never back. I Really hope this helps you, if not i'm sorry. Hang in there and GOOD LUCK your included in my prayers.
2006-08-27 22:25:46 · answer #6 · answered by Craig G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not ur fault or either u r a loser.
Its simply ur character behaviour that attracts abusive behaviour from ur ex husband. Its like "hit me" written on ur forehead.
U need to change ur mindset, value urself as a whole being. There is nothing wrong with u. The only wrong thing is, when u THINK there is something wrong with u.
Stop wasting ur money on therapy, it doesnt help.
When u r drowning, u dont need someone to teach u how to swim. u need someone to SAVE u. U NEED A SAVIOUR.
U need Jesus in ur life. go to any local church near ur place that preaches about Jesus love, His finished work and what He already done for u.
You are precious in His sight.
Have a blessed new life ahead! :)
2006-08-27 22:23:54 · answer #7 · answered by J 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i really dont know what to tell you..im really sorry for what you have been through..and i know how scary and how empty it can feel to be alone..your dream man will show up unexpected one day sweetheart and he will be everything you ever wanted..until then focus on finding your inner peace and being happy alone...(which for me would be almost impossible) but im sure all you have been through you are a much stronger woman then me. even if you dont feel strong..you are..people learn from there mistakes..and im not saying your marriages were mistakes..but the men who mistreated you made the mistakes..you did the right thing..which is also the hardest thing..moving on and getting yourself out of a bad situation.always value yourself..and know that you dont have to be anyones bi*tch..keep being strong mama and love will come your way..your not a loser at all either..good men are hard to come by these days..you have to be very selective and very sure of someone b4 you let them in..be careful with your heart and guard it with your life..cuz i believe in the end its all a person has..ill keep you in my prayers..good luck .
2006-08-27 22:22:03 · answer #8 · answered by kelkel0514 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you're not a loser for being married 3 times. you just need sometime to yourself, and think where to look, for a great guy, someone who loves you a lot wouldn't abuse you physically. I say let the right person come to you.
2006-08-27 22:17:50 · answer #9 · answered by superboredom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't make you a loser at all but I sure wouldn't be searching for someone to be with! You need to take the time and find yourself and know what you want and need and then find someone to fulfill those needs! Good luck!
2006-08-27 22:17:20 · answer #10 · answered by monroe1172002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not a loser. I'm sure you will find someone worthy of you at some point, but for now just be happy with yourself.
2006-08-27 22:18:29 · answer #11 · answered by just me 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋