I am in an on-off long distance relationship with someone I absolutely love and adore and who has been my best friend for over 5 years.
Yet I date other people, a lot at college.
Why can't I stop? Yet when I date those people, I still feel emotionally devoid, and I feel depressed all the time.
Seriously, I don't know what's wrong with me. My best friend is the most beautiful guy in the world, the sweetest, everything...
How can I stop? (And to make matters "worse," I get asked out a lot at college...and then I think, what the hey, a dinner won't harm...)
2006-08-27 13:29:38 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I do believe that you care 4 this person, but to tell you the truth --- if he is "the one", he'd have your undivided attention... No one could turn your head --- you wouldn't think twice about looking at someone else...
Look, you're still young... play the field, keep your options open...enjoy dating others without any hangups... As you get older, you'll figure out how this dating things works... Trust me on this one.
When he decides to settle down & looks for a wife -- he's not gonna look at the 1-night stands or easy chicks -- he's gonna look 4 the one(s) who really knew him or took the time to get to know him... You're the closest to him... & he'll never forget that...
2006-08-27 13:47:25 · answer #1 · answered by zgoddess_isis 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The uncertainty of an on-off long distance relationship can be very hard to deal with. Being college age makes it even hard when you are in your prime of you life for dating and finding out more about the world you live in.
In the back of your mind I'm sure you have wondered if the relationship ever turns off forever you will have wasted some of your youth on someone that didn't pan out.
The fact that you absolutely love and adore this person makes it very hard to give them up but it also robs you of enjoying the other people you date and your love for a person you may never have could keep you from finding love elsewhere.
I suggest you sit down and explain your feeling to him in an open way without judgment or confrontation, face to face. If he is willing to both hear you out as well as make a real effort to address the problem, then you have someone worth fighting for. If not, you will simply have to bite the bullet and bring it to an end no matter how much it hurts. You can sit and cry about it for awhile but don't stay there to long because you will be even more ready to find true love than ever before. Even if you stop dating all together for awhile that time can be spend on your own growth so that you won't rebound on someone that isn't right for you. It will get better.
2006-08-27 20:58:31 · answer #2 · answered by trentmrlowe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with dating other people if you are in an on-off long distance relationship. I am going through the same exact thing completely and all the details you explained is what I am going through also including how long we have been best friends. My sn is the same one listed as my name so if you need any help or have any questions feel free to email me or im me and I would love to help or know what ends up happening. I wish you the best of luck and that everything goes well.... Take this as a test... if you want to be withhim and you know that he is the one that you want to be with then you can say that you dated around and have no regrets on life. Take each day as it comes and I know that everything goes well... GOOD LUCK!
2006-08-27 20:36:19 · answer #3 · answered by Babygurl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Apparently you don't adore them as much as you think. College is a great time to explore the world & yourself. Why don't you make the relationship "off" for now so you can date & have fun. If you two are meant to be then you can reunite after you finish school. No sense in destroying any hope of a future now by cheating.
2006-08-27 20:33:40 · answer #4 · answered by orionsgirl76 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you love someone you wouldn't cheat on them no matter how far away they are away from you. I think you could stop but you don't wont to stop. You think that just cause she is far away from you she is doing the same thing but sometimes you could be away from someone and still be faithful. Just stop dating other people cause if she comes to your hometown or where ever you at someone will tell her and that will end yall relationship.
2006-08-27 20:43:35 · answer #5 · answered by kita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are young. Your friends are dating why shouldn't you.
You said the relationship you are having is on-off. Why shouldn't you be dating.
2006-08-27 20:39:47 · answer #6 · answered by sarah071267 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
long distance relationships are hard. you can't just reach out and touch them. we as humans need to be touched and loved. it's totally normal. is he okay with you dating other ppl? i wouldn't feel bad. ur just human. enjoy the true love you have with him and if he's okay with it enjoy the substitutes that help pass the time. don't see any harm in it if he's okay with it of course. are you okay with him seeing other ppl? i'm sure he has these same issues. u 2 should talk about it
2006-08-27 20:34:53 · answer #7 · answered by liketoplay420 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like you may have codependancy issues and need the affection and attention of others to feel good about yourself.
Unless you learn to respect and love yourself, all your relationships will suffer.
2006-08-27 20:34:36 · answer #8 · answered by JabbaTheButt 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Love has nothing to do with it .You're a very self absorbed person .Let the great guy go.So he can find someone honest and appreciative of his goodness.
2006-08-27 20:40:15 · answer #9 · answered by painting? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u love this person....then it shouldnt be too hard to stop..i understand that u like the attention of these other people...but if u want upit best friend to respect and trust u it shouldnt be to hard to say "no i cant go out to dinner, i have a boy friend"
2006-08-27 20:33:05 · answer #10 · answered by Marshy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋