Muslims only...co-wives?

Question

What websites would give me information about the rules for a man to approach a woman to be a co-wife?

**Does the man need to tell his first wife before he marries? please give facts form Qur'an/hadith or references to a website

****Are you aware of anything in the Qur'an or hadiths that say how the man should support the 2nd financially as far as shelter, food , clothing? References to hadith/Qur'an please

Jazak allahu Khairan

Answer 1

While I am not Muslim, my ex-husband was so I am very familiar with the questions you have posed. It should be noted that I studied Islam when I was married.

1. It is proper and respectful for a man to inform his first wife that he would like to co-habitat with a second wife.

2. The Prophet said that the man must be able to support his second, third and fourth wives all in the same manner as his first wife. Example: If the first wife has a house, servants, etc., each subsequent wife must be treated equally. If a man cannot support each wife (household) in the same manner, then the Prophet said that the man should not marry a second, third, or fourth wife.

Have a lovely rest of the evening.......Bright Blessings Upon You.

Answer 2

ur only allowed to marry more than once if u have no other option for example if ur first wife can not have kids and even then it is better if u can adopt instead of re-marrying in the time of muhammed (saw) he married more than once to help women living in poverty have a better life and to make sure widowed women do not lose their rights, back then this was the only way you could help poverty stricken women and so on which is why it happend, but now things are different and it is clearly stated in the quran that a second marriage should only occur if u have no other choice and even then u must ask ur first wife for permission if she is not happy with the idea then u can not remarry whilen ur still married to her, also if u can not treat them the same u are not to remarry!

Answer 3

here is what i know:

-he 1st has to be very fair. if he can't be fair then remain with only one

Quran 4:3
[3] .....but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one ......."

-God is telling men that you will never be fair even if you tried:

Quran 4:129
[129] You will never be able to do perfect justice between wives even if it is your ardent desire, so do not incline too much to one of them (by giving her more of your time and provision) so as to leave the other hanging (i.e. neither divorced nor married). And if you do justice, and do all that is right and fear Allâh by keeping away from all that is wrong, then Allâh is Ever Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

-introduce ur wife with compelements and forplay (kissing, soft touching, nice words). such as don't jump on her like animals:

Quran 2:223
[223] Your wives are a tilth for you, so go to your tilth, when or how you will, and send (good deeds, or ask Allâh to bestow upon you pious offspring) for your ownselves beforehand. And fear Allâh, and know that you are to meet Him (in the Hereafter), and give good tidings to the believers (O Muhammad (peace be upon him))

-either live with them in kindness or leave them in kindness

Quran 2:229
[229] The divorce is twice, after that, either you retain her on reasonable terms or release her with kindness....."

-live with them honorably. and becareful!, if you hate something about ur wife, God may make this bad thing that u hate so blessing.

Quran 4:
[19] ......And live with them honorably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allâh brings through it a great deal of good.

Answer 4

Well Jazak, it is basic "right" of the male in the muslim society to have upto as many as four wives. So there need not be any "informative" dailogue with your current wife.
Secondly, as per Koran marriage is only a contract for a man to gain access to the reproductive organs of a woman solely for the purpose of his physical pleasure. They are not bound by any responsibility to support the ladies. Look at muslim societies, if there were any obligations as to provide for the wife/wives, muslims would be into family planning.
For your reference "Why I am not a muslim" by Ibn Warraq.