I would like to get married and have children, but I associate sex with violence due to a stranger rape when I was 8 years old. Just seeing couples holding hands makes me want to vomit and I have panic attacks. I am in therapy, but I don't see that it is helping.
2006-08-27 11:14:50 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Many persons hv different phobias. I will suggest u to surf on the following websites. Here u will find the symptoms of different phobias, remedy to those phobias. I hope much of ur curiosity about phobias will be satisfied.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/-phobia
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/phobia_symptoms_types_treatment.htm
http://www.phobias-help.com/
http://www.hypnosisanswers.com/typesofphobias/
http://hcd2.bupa.co.uk/fact_sheets/html/phobias.html
Please visit the above pages. I hope it helps u.
2006-08-29 01:21:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
That is really terrible to feel. Sex is wonderful, especially when you do with with somebody you love.
If therapy is not helping, that is because you have closed your mind and your belief that sex can be a good thing. I don't blame you. I will blame the stranger who took advantage of you when you were so young.
If therapy indeed does not work, then only you can help yourself. If you find a partner, or got somebody close to you, be open to him and tell him how you feel about being close, holding hands, kissing, etc. If he is mature enough to understand, he'll stand by you no matter what. If not, dump him and you don't deserve another fool.
Your parents (if they're together) and siblings who are married can also help you. They are living examples that sex is not a totally terrifying experience.
2006-08-27 11:22:22 · answer #2 · answered by Busy Diyosa 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need a male who will have a ton and a half of patience. This is a big issue and just therapy wont cure it. You need to slowly allow a man in your life, even if its just a a friend.
I had a friend with a similar issue. It was very akward, I somehow managed to get her to hold my hand when we would go for walks. I never liked her as anything else than a friend, but the whole hand thing did help her. She is engaged now.... to a very shy guy.....LOL
2006-08-27 11:21:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your therapy isn't helping, you need to find a new therapist!
That's what it's going to take to get you on the road to recovery. Sometimes it takes a while to find a therapy that works, so stick with it.
Exposure therapy has not been shown to work with this phobia, and it's more than a trust issue - it has to do with shame, self-worth, guilt, and hurt from your past experience. It's more than just having a wonderful, trusting relationship can cure. Good luck, and don't give up.
2006-08-27 11:21:41 · answer #4 · answered by Bad Kitty! 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if you want to succeed in life of having a marriage and children you must try harder to overcome your fear. I am so sorry that you had to go through such an awful and embarrassing encounter, I really feel for you my dear. Please keep up the therapy, it just may take a little longer but I think in the end result it will be fine, just keep going to your therapist. I wish you all the best.
2006-08-27 11:19:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you need to talk to someone else like a pastor someone more spritual. Why don't you a pray about it and seek other help. And truly let go of the past before it destroys your future.
Be encouraged I am Praying for You
1love
2006-08-27 11:25:48 · answer #6 · answered by caramelcutie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex is not worth it believe me l've tried it. You can always adopt children without ever having sex. l'm in an asexual relationship right now and it is the most wonderful feeling l've ever had we don't even hug or hold hands. We just enjoy each others company.
2006-08-27 11:21:24 · answer #7 · answered by catsclaw 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think to get over your phobia the best thing would be to do it. try to start out holding hands with some1. And go from there. Go slowly and work your way up to it. And I think that u will realize that its not that bad or hard
2006-08-27 11:19:08 · answer #8 · answered by sexystud32111 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You may not believe it, but your better off with it , until you find a mate to settle down with and get married! Sadly many marriages are filled with violence and constant fighting!
2006-08-27 11:20:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to realize that not all men are bad. Its time for you to realize that you are a good person and you are not going to let that rapist take away your happyness anymore. You should start by masterbating, so you at least feel comfortable with giving yourself pleasure. Then you may be able to get and give pleasure with someone else.
2006-08-27 11:19:33 · answer #10 · answered by willberb 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋