2006-08-27 09:18:20 · 14 answers · asked by Norma S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
The maid of honor and the other bridesmaids should be footing the bill for the shower. If they need help financially, then they should talk to the bride's mother, or have a cheaper party. If you are one of the maids, then fork it over. It comes with the job.
As a guest, it's not your responsibility to pay for it. You should only be responsible for the gift. If they want people to help pay, then they need to be aware that the quality of the gifts will decrease. If a person can spend $50, and $20 goes to party costs, that only leaves $30 for a gift. Now it's limited on what can be bought that is nice for the bride.
Remind her (them) that not only are you having to pay for the gift now, but you will also have all the expenses for attending the wedding. Clothing, accessories, travel, hotels, another gift, etc... Explain that you are on a budget, and you just don't have a ton of money to spend.
2006-08-29 20:00:06 · answer #1 · answered by welches_grape_jelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is tacky. I just declined attending the bridal shower of a good friend (no I'm not in the wedding party - just a friend who is invited to attend the wedding). I knew there would be a shower so had already purchased a gift for the bride (as well as a wedding gift for the couple). When the shower invitation arrived, however, it stated that the shower would be held after hours at a lingerie shop and the guests are "respectfully" asked to contribute $20. as their gift to purchase the bride a gift card. It also said that those guest who wished to spend more would be able to select from a few chosen items. I'm fairly confident that my friend, the bride, would have been terribly embarrassed by this whole concept. I found the whole thing just tacky and have chosen to just quietly give her my gift some other time. Zenobia.
2006-08-27 17:52:51 · answer #2 · answered by zenobia2525 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO!!!! I'm sorry but you don't know what everyone's income is like. Either you want the $20 or a gift. I mean I've heard for a baby shower give a book instead of a card that's cool because a card cost just as much as little kids book. But literally asking them for money AND gift....I don't think I would even want to come! They give you a gift...that's it! You should be happy that they are giving you things to start your new married life. That is just rude!
2006-08-27 16:24:05 · answer #3 · answered by browneyegirl 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well it depends. If you are in the wedding then yes... you do realize that you also have to pay for your bridesmaid's dress, don't you? Too late to start getting stingy. If you aren't in the wedding or are only an invitee to the shower, then no, it's not. The shower is a gift to the bride from her attendants, not the entire guest list.
2006-08-27 16:35:33 · answer #4 · answered by Stina 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well,etiquette wise that means all the bridesmaids are asking people to may for the party their being inviteded too.Which is tacky and rude.You are never suppose to ask gests for money if you can't afford to hold it at an inexpensive place then you shouldn't.I wonder does the bride by any chance know that her bridesmaids are trying to get money out of her guests.I considered tell her that her bridesmaids are m,aking her wedding a fundraiser.
2006-08-27 17:23:01 · answer #5 · answered by movin12006 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The bridesmaids shouldn't be getting gifts!
But if what you mean is the bridesmaid is asking the guests to donate $20 to the couple (as well as giving a gift), it can be done, but it will look tacky. I seriously would think twice before asking people for cash.
2006-08-27 16:22:25 · answer #6 · answered by LingXinYi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO the brides maid should not ask for $20.00 and a gift for the bride.Because that is just wrong.Its either one but not both. and its wrong to ask for money any way.the only way you should ask for money is if you want to pass around an envelope to take up money for the bride and groom for there honeymoon.that to me is more acceptable than asking for it.
2006-08-27 16:29:37 · answer #7 · answered by Angel sent from heaven 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, totally tacky--not to mention poor taste and lacking ettiquette.
If a guest is expected to bring a gift, that gift will suffice. You can not ask for a donation as well.
2006-08-27 16:24:37 · answer #8 · answered by dlgrl=me 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i don't think it should be like that unless its to help the bride
2006-08-28 00:14:53 · answer #9 · answered by the shy one 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you kidding me?! That's beyond tacky. You don't ask for anything at the shower.........people bring what they bring.....
2006-08-27 22:51:19 · answer #10 · answered by bluez 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋