After 6 months my girlfriend's Ex, whom she remains friends with, calls her a dozen times a day, at all hours, wanting to chat, know where she is, who she is with, etc. He told her recently that he still thinks that they will wind up together, but she told me not to worry because she thinks he will get over it. He yells at her, belittles her, me, and our relationship, and has physically grabbed her, held her, and tried to kiss her several times recently. I'm at my wits end because the guy seems to be genuinely crazy, borderline stalker, yet she refuses to push him away and still wants to chat on the phone with him and "hang out" with him a couple times a week.. Am I overreacting for being extremely upset about this??? What should I do???
2006-08-26 21:32:36 · 25 answers · asked by Alan T 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you act insecure about it then she might just do it to get a rise out of you. If you are the one she truly wants then she will tell the other guy to buzz off. Some girls think it's fun to have two guys trying to get them, but it's not fun for the guys involved.
2006-08-26 21:38:26 · answer #1 · answered by starrynight1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she is mixed up, if she wants to spend some time with him. This guy sounds like an abuser and is very controlling. I wonder if she's afraid of what he might do if she doesn't give into his demands. It would be good if she could see him for the person he is and tell him to leave her alone. If he doesn't, she should call the police and document everything. It will be helpful in getting a restraining order. If he does anything to you, I would definitely call the police.
2006-08-27 04:44:10 · answer #2 · answered by salsera 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is extremely disrespectful on her and his part. You need to make up your mind and either deal with it or give her an ultimatum. Ask her to put herself in your shoes and exactly explain to her what's been going on from day 1; 6 months ago. She will either realize that she is ruining your relationship or if not, she is crazy - RUN, let them deal with each other and find another girl without the baggage.
2006-08-27 04:41:28 · answer #3 · answered by nymischief 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She seemingly doesn't want to let go of this person that seems to be unbalanced, unpredictable, and inconsiderate. If she can't let him go, you shouldn't hang around. Does your gf think that in another 6 months he'll get over it? As long as she "welcomes" his advances without her saying no, he will never rest until he has her back or driven away every boyfriend she has including you. It's up to her. Does she want you or not? You are not for rent.
2006-08-27 04:45:46 · answer #4 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly thats rediculous. i dont feal you are over reacting you have a right to be conserened for her. it sounds like the guy is a total soseopath and aut to have a restraning order. but you shouldent get ignorent to him. that wont salv anything. ask your gir friend to put limets on there relationship dont anser the phone or the door for him all the time. ask her to be cousis and not so "friendly" with him. but what ever you do dont loos your temper and say somthing stooped.
2006-08-27 04:41:12 · answer #5 · answered by jon i 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she still cares for him. If you tell her to make a choice she will choose him. If you actually trust and love this girl than you will let her handle it, the only time you step in is when things get out of hand.
2006-08-27 04:41:11 · answer #6 · answered by demons_echo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alan,
Ur gf ex sounds abusive, and being her bf i personally think you have rights to stop her from contacting your gf. And probably your gf still cannot forget her ex totally.
Talk to your gf but dont tell her to stop talking with her ex , instead tell her how much u worry abt her safety and ask if she could ignore her ex calls.
2006-08-27 04:41:54 · answer #7 · answered by angelinecja 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
calling that much is inappropriate. Your girlfriend has to set boundaries with her ex or she can no longer be friends with him. Don't act like a jealous fool and tell her how you really feel. But she needs to let her ex know that you two are together, she doesnt like him, and that they can only be friends if he can abide by that.
2006-08-27 04:36:58 · answer #8 · answered by Lov'n IT! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey.. you got to be kidding me..
he's your girl's ex and she still entertains him?
i would do more than over reacting if i were you!
you need to have a really good heart to heart talk..
coz the guy is obviously not over your girl.. and the girl is sending a message that she still cares for the guy..
keep in mind that she's been involve with the guy.. and who knows if she's still is?
think about it..
2006-08-27 04:40:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is soooooooooooooooooooooooo foolish!!! Dump her and get yourself someone who doesn't play games because that is what they are both doing and your right smack dab in the middle. Do you deserve to be,I don't think so.
2006-08-27 04:45:15 · answer #10 · answered by Linda R 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋