I stubbed my toe the other day and I prayed to Jesus to fix it 'cause it was throbbin' real bad, but he never did.
Then I finally just walked it off and went in the kitchen to get some Campbell's soup, and when I opened the cabinet door, a big can of Cream'o'Mushroom fell right out on top of the same toe.
Now its all bruised and it won't stop hurting.
2006-08-26 20:42:24 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
try ibuprofen moron
2006-08-26 20:56:11 · answer #1 · answered by piece of mind 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is this true, or is it intended to be funny? I tuned in here because I thought, "What is the 'Jerk' stuff about, I wonder.'
Seriously, let me share some of my religious beliefs. While bad things happen, and they are never reparied, it seems, as rapidly as we'd like, wisdom does not allow us to confuse prayer with instruction. Sometimes people pray thinking they're giving God instructions of some kind or informing God. This is a childish attitude toward God: that God is somehow stupid and needs to be disabused or instructed. It always demonstrates ignorance of God to pray about specific things, as if God does not know what is good for us and needs to be informed. God knows what is good far, far better that we WILL EVER know!! We must pray then not to inform God, but to acknowledge God's absolute authority. I pray this way always: "Lord, Jesus Christ, please have mercy on us," or "Jesus please guide me." All else is ignorance and usurpation and childish misconception.
Eventually your foot stops hurting, but even if you took an aspirin instead of "praying", what makes you think your convalescence is not part of God's plan? (rhet.)
2006-08-27 04:05:16 · answer #2 · answered by voltaire 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my god, people like you make my day so happy and full of excitement, I do not know if Jesus is a jerk but I asked to win the lottery, twice, and nothing happened so I am a little hesitant.
2006-08-27 03:47:17 · answer #3 · answered by sotirakis5 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Jesus is Jesus and not an office assitant to come at your beck and call moreover before your big toe got bruised Jesus had asked you to do so many things ,,,,,,,,did you do it ,,,,,,,no ,,,,,,,,then are you also a JERK
2006-08-27 03:53:24 · answer #4 · answered by Practical 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well then, there you go. Now you can't say "he doesn't exist". You are living proof. Not the Jesus you expected, but the Jesus who suffered more than you'll ever know.
2006-08-27 03:47:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Seems to me you better be praying for what ever it may have been that you done. Maybe you are being punished!
2006-08-27 03:48:20 · answer #6 · answered by Board 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe but either way he's sure got a great sense of humour! Ha ha!!
2006-08-27 12:35:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if Jesus is a jerk or not ...but you're kinda clumsy.
2006-08-27 03:45:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You obviously had brain damage.
2006-08-27 03:49:39 · answer #9 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know...I always thought so,but it's good to know other people get sh!t on too.
2006-08-27 03:49:54 · answer #10 · answered by ... 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, certainly: not Jesus!
2006-08-27 03:48:38 · answer #11 · answered by swanjarvi 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋