I have a bit of concentration problem here .... need ur advice friends ..?

Question

Well my girlfriend cheated on me quite recently so i have very upset with the whole thing .... fits of anger occur in me now and then .... as a result of this i find it really tough when i study .... i keep getting distracted ...
any good advice from u people will do ...
thanks

Answer 1

If you can't talk about it with her directly another thing that will at least help you is.....write a very angry detailed letter to her about it and make it really express how you feel. When all of your feelings are on the paper, take the letter to a safe place and light it on fire. Then try to let it go. That works for a lot of people.

Answer 2

Its completely normal to get distracted when an affair has just gone wrong.. No matter what you do with girls, they're always haunting inside your head.. I guess you still have some strong feelings on her.. A part of you hates her while the other part loves her it seems? That's why you get angry now and then and you're upset.. If she's cheated on you, then think that she's not the on for you.. You cannot force her to love you or like you if she wants to leave let her. That's not the answer you're looking for... You said you have a concentration problem here.. Ya its normal for all the feelings, emotions come to your head when you study.. That's because you set your mind to study and that is a good time for your unconscious mind to evaluate what went wrong etc.. No matter how much you try not to think about it, when your mind is clear, these feelings come to your head.. I think it happens to you early in the morning before you get out of your bed or when you go to sleep in the night... Ok my point is this... It takes some time to get rid of these feelings.. They fade away slowly.. It takes some time depending on the person..

Answer 3

Well, this is really sad. First thing I want to ask is why are you still with this girl ?? You think that she won't do this to you again?? Once a cheater, always a cheater, please remember that, no matter what she promises you. My adivce on that matter which you didn't ask, is this, dump her like now. Don't give her a second chance to break your heart because in the future, when it does happen again, it'll hurt even more.
Second, what I have done when I can't concentrate because of my problems, what ever they may be is to tell myself that this person is NOT GOING TO INTERFERE IN MY LIFE, MY FUTURE. I won't allow this to happen. Then, I would re read what I read and try once again to concentrate. I just kept telling myself that no one is worth destroying my life over and in a hundred years, what that person did to me won't matter to anyone. For right now, I refuse to allow this person to interrupt my thought pattern, I must get beyond this and concentrate.
You are angry, I understand this, but I really think it is more hurt than anger. You can never really trust her, you know, not any more. Voice your feelings to her and to a friend, let it out. Talk to someone who will let you vent. Getting the words out, sometimes will also help relieve some of the feelings you are having. Believe me, you must move on, you just must. There is someone out there who will appreciate a guy like you, honest and loyal and think more of you because you would not allow someone to cut you in half.
Good luck, really. I hope this helped.

Answer 4

It's the worst feeling ever isn't it? I understand completely why you are angry and have hard time concentrating. I hyperventilated when it happened to me....I never ever hyperventilated before...so I called 911...I thought I was gonna die.
My head started getting numb on one side and then my whole half side went numb. You have to talk about it...this is a good start...keep on talking about it until you are getting tired of talking about it. You can talk to me, if you want....You can also right a journal...you can call it "The Aftermath Journal". There are also books out there...I read books after books ...I have become quite an expert in this matter. There's one book called "Surviving Infidelity"...I found it very helpful.
I'm not so sure if it was this book that said.. it's important that you blame the person who committed infidelity...because if you don't know how to blame...then you will not be able to express your anger. When someone commits adultery- it isn't you who is to blame....because that person could have broken up with you first before running into somebody elses arms. There's no doubt that you must have contributed to your partner's infidelity to some degree....but leaving you first would have been less painful. Cheating gives the cheater power...power over when to let her/his partner know.

Answer 5

It’s normal and it will pass. None of us can focus really well after a disturbing trauma. Try getting lots of sleep so that your brain can work on your feelings during the night and try 3 sessions of meditation during the day. Morning, noon, and night. During the meditations just relax and when you notice yourself thinking about things then just let go of those thoughts and focus on some mental imagery of some beautiful place. Try to get detailed about the place and imagine the grass and flowers and trees and waterfall or whatever your imaginary place is. When thoughts of her creep into your imagery that’s okay, just let go of them and refocus on the peaceful imagery. You can do this to some very quiet peaceful music or to the sounds of rain or ocean, etc. There will be a strong tendency on your part not to do this meditation but if you do it you will be amazed at how helpful it can be. Do it for 20 minutes 3 times a day if you’re really having a hard time or as little as 5 minutes 3 times a day if you’re having a good day. These feelings you are having that are interrupting your studies will go away and you’ll get over this. Remember, once you notice you’re thinking about something then it’s your choice whether or not you continue to think about it or if you let it go and choose to think about something else. The meditation will help you build the skill to let go of thoughts when you want to.

Answer 6

Lose the anger. If she cheated on you is she still your girl? You might just need to get rid of her picture and forget about her for the rest of the semester. Don't call. Don't take her call, and try not to think about her. This cheating thing will happen again, by the way. You are beter off just sitting it out and focusing on your studies.

Answer 7

Time is the biggest healer so this one will also pass, yes to increase your concentration the best thing is meditation this will not only increase your concentration but also help you to overcome the worldly emotions to a great extend,,,,,,,,,join a good meditation center

Answer 8

enable dad and mom get contain in this severe capture 22 challenge. in the experience that your intentions are organic - then i'm particular in due time, your pal might have the skill to forgive you for sharing this information to her dad and mom. Being alcoholic damages no longer in elementary terms ones destiny yet additionally her dating with different persons. until now issues get extra complicated, I firmly have self belief you are going to be able to desire to seek for for help: her dad and mom, your dad and mom, a coaching counselor, an grownup you the two believe.

Answer 9

don't be with that gurl anymore she ruined the relationship and now everytime something bad happends your going to blame her for messing up the relationship in the first place.... save yourself some time and study on school it will make you smart and rich!

Answer 10

Seriously, it is not worth for you to be angry with people like dat.... you should be happy that u see her true colours early.
Forget her, carry on with your life... time will heal the pain.
Look on the bright side...and good luck !