How likely is it that..?

Question

Hi,Im 15 going on 16 in a couple months and My boyfriend is 16 going on 17 next month on the 13th. Were in love, && were not sexually active that much. But we both want to have sex, and we both know 110% that were ready and understand What could happen If anything goes wrong.. && I thought sex brought a couple closer together and made it a stronger relationship since your going onto the next level.. But all on yahoo! answers.. everyones saying it messes up the relationship no matter what. So, how could it mess up our relationship?? and how likly is it too??

assuming that we dont get pregnant. Or anything..
How would it mess it up?

Answer 1

It won't necessarily be messed up, but it will change things forever in both good and bad ways. Once you start having sex, if it's too much to handle you can't go back to holding hands.

It's your decision, but it sounds as if you are legally underage, and have some doubts, or you wouldn't be asking this question.

All I'll say is Think about it. Really think about it. Take a long time to think about it.

And obviously if you decide yes in the end, use protection, but remember there is no contraceptive that is 100% reliable. And condoms don't always protect you from HPV, because the condom only covers the penis, and not the area around the penis. And if you don't know what HPV is, and what it can lead to, then you need to educate yourself a lot more before having sex. Talk to a doctor or a nurse before you have sex.

Answer 2

You are only 15. You have a school and have to be able to get out on your own. The one you love is your boyfriend. Boyfriends change. So you sleep with the BF now, then when you break up you sleep with the nex BF and the next. Having sex with your BF guarantees nothing. Some of the most long term relationships are of people who chose not to have sex until they married. I am talking about people married 30 to 50 years. Many of those who started having sex young do not have long term realtionships. Going on to the next level of realtionship means getting to know each other better and not have sex. Sex does mess relationships up. Waiting until you are married means a lot and it makes for a better life long relationship. "Old saying familiarity breeds contempt. " If you get pregnant, is your boy friend ready to marry you. Will you be able to live on minimum wage. Do you have a good family to help you through the tough times. Or will you end up as a single parent trying to attract a husband who will not abuse your child and be good to you. I thought I was grown up at age 15 too and I thought I knew all the answers to life. Now 50 years later I look back and think of what little I knew about life. So take your time. Do not be ready to jump into bed just because those hormones are surging. Get a good hold on life before you start having sex. Make sure you have a committed husband who can support a family. Finish school and go to college. When you are 20 you will look back and see how little you knew at age 15 and how immatrue the 15 year olds are compared to 20 or 30. Sex without a commited marriage does foul up a realtionship.

Answer 3

Do not give it up to him. I was a 16 year old guy once and i realize that i had no idea what love is actually im 20 now and i still don't understand it all. It normally ruins relationships when the people are too young to handel it. No offence but at 15 I'm pretty sure you are too young. I lost my virginity when i was 19 and i think i was too young now that i look back. But I am marrying the only girl i ever had sex with and we are happy together. The best advice i could give you is to wait

Answer 4

..Sex does not necessarilly break up relationships. Some people that have sex early on in it before getting to know the person, end up just relying on sex with the person. And if the sex sucks or something about the persons sexualness dissatisfies them, then they dunno what else to do, and leave the person. I don't think sex will ruin the relationship between you and your b/f. Maybe depends how long you guys been together though and at some point, might only stay together for the sex....which seriously happens when the emotional connection fails. Otherwise, it'll probably just connect you guys better.

Answer 5

the reason it tends to ruin relationships (ones that arn't committed fully to each other in marriage) is that it is mysteriously sacred and once "pandora's box", so to speak, is open, things start to take twists that you and he probably arn't ready for. You may start to get extremely possessive...this is natural...you, as a woman, were meant to be in committed relationships, and when theres no marriage or committment, yet sex is present, resentment and jealously rear their oh so ugly heads. For him, it may a list of things that happen...he may think its not as good as he was hoping for and begins looking into other things to bring back the passion that was there before actual intercourse got involved. He may also think its getting too deep and be ready to end it, because he's not sure he can handle the deepness thats mysteriously entered between you. And the worst that can happen is....he's conquered you and he didn't even have to give you a ring or make a committment that was expected of him to fulfill....he may just think thats a reason to move on.

I'm not saying either of you are bad and that the motives to sex are bad. They're natural, but....like i said...once sex (the mystery of relationships that can build or destroy) enters the picture, you can be sure it will either make or more often than not, break the bf/gf relationship.

(hey... i didn't even mention STDs or Pregnancy!...)

Answer 6

Because sex is an adult activity, and neither one of you are adults. I know that when I was fifteen, I couldn't even decide what to wear in the mornings, much less make decisions that could effect the rest of my life. Wait a few years, and if the two of you are still together, then see what happens. Being pregnant or getting a venereal disease at sixteen will be the end of your life as you know it.

Answer 7

At your age, sex is a hard thing for adults to give advice on, we all want to say NO, wait. Why? Because you should wait until you know for sure that you are in love, and are mature enough to take all the responsibility that comes with sex. Most sane people would tell you to wait until you are married, but that seems so out dated, at least wait until you are sure the guy is the one for you and you plan to get married. If you choose to have sex, are you ready for the possiblity of children? What if he is telling you exactly what you want to hear, and then as soon as you give it to him, he is gone? That would complicate things wouldn't it? So that is why you need to be sure. Without a doubt. I can trust that you can make those kinds of decisions at your age, but would like you to take your time, and consider all the options and possibities, before rushing into it.

Answer 8

It does change everything. After you have sex once, then you've crossed the threshold. It's no big deal to have sex afterwards once you've done it the first time. It's easier to do it again, and again, and again. Assuming you enjoy it, you won't feel satisfied again with just going half-way.

Be careful and smart, which is hard to do when you're 16 and in lust.

Answer 9

Neither of you is old enough for marriage and in case you got pregnant you might think about an abortion - that wouldn't be good either (in my opinion). The situation you and your boyfriend find yourselves in is the reason why women used to only have sex after marriage (most of them anyway). I know it's not a popular viewpoint, but it does have the advantage of preventing trouble.

Answer 10

you are too young and you need to save that, because when your 20 your gonna look back and be like ughh i wish i wouldnt have done that... on my page i asked how old people where when they lost they're virginity and most of them say they wished they would have waited longer... go look at that and read what some people wrote, its interesting. but seriously your too young to be in love.. you might not want to hear that, but its true. WAIT if you're unsure if it'll ruin your relationship or not, you ARENT ready... theres alot of stuff that goes into sex and you have your whole life ahead of you, DONT screw it up.