Really, why do people have children?

Question

I obviously don’t have children. I am nearly 30 and am chastised daily for not having children. I get the looks of dismay, disappointment and pity-why? Some people have said “Who will take care of you when you’re old?” “Your married, you need to have a child”. “Children are wonderful, you’re missing out”. “Give your mother a grandchild for god’s sake”. “Can you even have children?”

Aside from fear of old age, responding to a programmed society and accidents, why do people have children? Seeking a logical answer that may alter my opinon.

Answer 1

Consider the IQ of the people that say these things to you.

The truth is most of those people are unhappy with their choice (excuse me accident). They have children because they didn’t use birth control.

So, to answer your question: People have children for the following reasons:

1.They are irresponsible.
2.They are selfish.
3.They are lemmings.

Sorry, two of these, you already mentioned. But honestly, these are the big three.

So when the same person asks you for the third time, “Why are you not having children”, just tell them flat out, “Because I am smarter than you.”

Good luck. Hopefully you make the right decision, and get a dog instead of having children. All your neighbors will fill the gap for you.

BTW: I am 40, and I am often mistaken for someone in my early 30’s or younger. Why, because I have not spent the last 20 years raising children! You should see all my HS friends. I had a vasectomy, and it did amazing things to improve my sex drive. I heard women say the same about tubal ligation.

Answer 2

Reading some of these responses chills me. The love involved between a parent and a child (a parent who wants a child) is the happiest, most fulfilling reward a parent can have. And to be able to give that child the chance to experience those same feelings later on in life is wonderful.
Although - if you do not want children, that is purely YOUR choice. And only a choice that can be made each on her own. You and your partner do what is right for the two of you - not for your parents or for society or anyone else!! Don't bring a child into this world if you are not going to love it - that's just not fair to the child!!

Answer 3

My answer isn't logical at all, but a part of the reason I had a child is the sense of being surrounded by love that I got when visiting many of my friends who have children. Now that I have a child, I think that's borne out--I don't think I've ever known this kind of love before.

There were also rational reasons involved, but none of them would be worth the effort involved if it weren't for the love. If you don't want to have children and your partner doesn't want to have children, bhen by all means you shouldn't--the world is overpopulated as it is.

The reasons people gave you that you list here don't seem particularly convincing. Especially the one about "who will take care of you when you're old?" because with the amount of money you save by not having children, you could probably retire to Aruba when you're old.

Answer 4

Children are not wonderful and they will not take care of you in your old age, no matter what anyone tells you. Don't be pressured into having them if you don't want them. You're not obligated to give your parents grandchildren, either. I've seen people have kids for many reasons other than wanting them, and the kids were abused, neglected, etc. People wonder why I'm not married and have no children, but I don't desire these things. It's not for everyone. Don't let others get you down. Children are overrated, as is marriage. People usually become fat and boring and saddled down with too many obligations once they marry and have kids. I enjoy being free and I won't ever have kids even if I do get married someday.

Answer 5

I wouldn't let something that someone says alter your opinon. You never know, you may change your mind. But, even if you don't, it's your decison. Some people just aren't kid people. There isn't a thing wrong with it. People can be so rude about it too. It's really annoying. You can always ask them a real personal question right back. Or just ignore them and ask as if they didn't say anything.

Answer 6

Sometimes insanity sets in and people do things that they later regret. Remember the cost factor when you decide to have children! Diapers, formula, clothes, toys, cribs, beds, medical bills, braces, school supplies, piano lessons, private schools, etc. Also, remember the headache factor, midnight feedings, teething, colic, measles, cursing, talking back, breaking windows, getting into fights, getting into trouble in school, skipping school, mooning cops etc. etc. After all is said and done if you still want kids God bless you! Have fun! Been there and done that! I love and adore my kids but being a parent has its moments of sheer frustration! Thank God my kids turned out OK!

Answer 7

I have 2 kids. I didnt really imagine myself as a mom. Then it just happened - I got pregnant. They are alot of responsibility and there is special moments. It's cool to watch them grow from a tiny helpless thing into almost a minature adult that wants to be just like you. No one else will love you so unconditionally and vice versa. It truely is a blessing, even though it IS hard work :)

Answer 8

Well, I wonder also and I'm a mother of 3. If I had a do-over, I'm not so sure I would have had any...maybe 1. Cats are alot easier.

Answer 9

Well apart from those three things, maybe they are all just jealous because they are tied down to band practice, ballet and no more romantic breakfast in bed for just the two of you.

Answer 10

Sometimes I look at children and their parents and wonder the same thing......Living proof for the value of forced sterilization...