Ready for this?

Question

Today I had a revelation. I am so sick of couples...I have put so much pressure on myself to "find" someone that after a while I just cracked. I decided that I am sick of wanting that. It would be great if it happened, but still. I am so sick of looking. I'm going to stop looking. No more wishing I had a guy to go shopping with, or cook with, or watch tv with. No more wishing I had someone to talk about nothing with, or fight with...I just don't care anymore. But here is the problem...I'll probably snap out of this in a few days and go back to wishing all of that again. Comments...?

Answer 1

You are absolutely right. In a few days you will go back to wishing you had someone. I feel the same way, except that I've been back and forth countless times. I have had a fair share of horrible relationships that should never even have been started, just because I wanted someone. But the healthy approach is to make yourself available whey you are, but don't actively divert your energy towards looking. You will just end up with some loser. The right guy will come along eventually. Or such is the hope :) But no partner is better than the wrong partner. Let that thought help you through those lonely moments.

Good luck :)

Answer 2

You're singing my song, except I'm a man and I wish I could just quit you women. You make me lonely and when you do become my companion and give me hope, you somehow manage to leave me empty inside, EVERY TIME. I'm sick of couples who, to me, appear to be only lying to themselves. I have never met anyone who is on their first marriage and happy, unless they are also ignorant,and in the honeymoon phase and know nothing about the times when the communication breaks down. Everyone wants someone to blame. Yea ,, I'm venting. I've invested what feels like too much in relationships only to have women give nothing in return and to cry to me about how they are sick of looking. I guess that would include you, even though I don't know you. So, I'll pick up the pieces again and go through the freeze gauntlet all the while smiling and being my usual amicable self toward every woman I meet when inside I can't stand to even be close to any of you. You give me every reason not to trust you while you claim you are looking for a companion. You women are the same as men. We all seem to want what we can't have. I'd rather be alone than to hope in vain. So, I quit! Oh, but my phone will ring tomorrow and, sure, I'll be kind, patient, and caring because that is who I am. Don't think for a minute that I am naive to being exploited. Yea , I'll probably read this later and think that maybe I shouldn't have submitted it, or maybe not. You're not the only one who has something to say! So, YEA, I WAS BORN READY !

So, after I wrote what I wrote I read your profile and I see that you are pursuing a carreer in teaching. I guarantee that High school will bring you to tears. I've been teaching for 8 years multiple subject, middle school and high school, and I haven't met a female teacher yet who wasn't brought to tears by there students in high school. Good luck!

Oh, and I didn't have to wait for tomorrow for my phone to ring. So I am once again reeled in by the charm of female compassion and understanding. I hope I don't regret the hope I feel now and have to go through the whole cycle again tomorrow, because if I do then I may have to stop answering the calls, and that would be a sad day.

Answer 3

In all honesty, you need to be able to make yourself happy before you can make someone else happy. It is a great idea to keep your mind on living a full life without a man. I am not saying you will never find one, but when you do find the right man you will have had time to do all the things you wanted before marriage, then you can settle down.

Interestingly enough, the happier you are by yourself, the more prone you are to meeting someone. It just happens that way. As soon as you give up and quit looking, you meet someone special.

Answer 4

We all go through stiff like that. Yeah, you will probably snap out of it. While you are waiting for the snap, enjoy yourself! Try a new craft, meet with your friends more often, find a new TV show and watch all the episodes. Don't go to 'hook up' places. Just when you get to enjoying your own life, someone will wander by. Dating/hunting for a date can suck. Might as well make it enjoyable.

Answer 5

This is what I see, and it's clear: you've become really frustrated at not finding someone yet. How things are now, and what you are after, which would change alot of things. That feeling of being stuck right at the "between." And now you've reached the pinnacle of being frustrated (you can see it from what you wrote); and yes, this part of it does pass. It's the worst part of it, and can stay with you for three days or a week. Hateful! Are you making yourself available enough? And when it happens that you meet someone, make sure it's the one for you. You're smart enough to remember this, right? You know how it can be: meet 4 guys and only one of them is okay for you. Some guys, and girls, aren't right for ANYONE, and should be separated from the main population! The mistake happens not when you meet a jerk, it's when you decide to get involved with him. Or her, in my case. Know what worked for me? Doing something you REALLY like doing, to help get you back in your normal (read: better)headspace. And you'll function better. Times can really suck when it gets like this. Just went thru it last week!!

Answer 6

there is no problem wishing u had someone to talk about nothing with,the problem is if you make a career out of it!do it now and then but concentrate on what you have now which is your independence.remember some attached people wish they could have it back.dont look for love but let it look for you!rest assured if its that way your goin to get it so dont despair!

Answer 7

I know how you feel. This sounds a lot like me right now. I'm waiting to meet "him" and it's really hard. I've been through some relationships with guys but i'm pretty sure i haven't met "him" yet. But i want to so bad...it's hard. Hey maybe we could talk more over e-mail. My e-mail is [e-mail]

Answer 8

Just don't let yourself go back. Focus on other things. If u can't help it then just wait 4 the right guy 2 come along.

Answer 9

I think that you are so right, last week I saw two couples shopping together and it grossed me out to the point that I want to stay single for a little while now...
You are right

Answer 10

Try not to assume that, because you might not snap out of it! Independence is a good thing. Plus, it might even help you get somebody (love comes when you least expect, you know!)