How can I get my 5 year old daughter to act more like an adult?

Question

I want my daughter to behave more like the little adult that she is. I think she has come a long way b/c she is being very polite and is really good at doing tea parties, treating her dolls like they were her own children, etc. but sometimes she gets these "urges" to go out and play in the neighbor's sandbox and get all dirty. This is unbecoming of a young woman and I'm not sure what to do about it. Is there a finishing school for young women anywhere near northern Georgia? What should I do?

Answer 1

OH PLEASE!.....Let her be a child and play in the sand box, she is a child not a woman yet....don't take that from her....You cant be serious, this is a joke RIGHT?
She should be outside making MUD PIES for her dolls and the tea party.

Answer 2

Lucky L. Every one the answers I have read so far have said to let your 5 year old be a child. She's five for gawd sake. My daughter is seven and she is very well behaved and treats older people with respect but that's not because I'm pushing her be become a little adult. Besides its not possible - a child brain is not mature enough to think the way adults do so you'd fail dismally there.

Look bottom line - the majority has it. Leave her alone to be a kid and allow her to grow and mature over the natural courses of time.

Answer 3

First stop thinking there is something wrong with her. She is not a little adult she is a 5 yr old child and those urges are just her being one. This is coming from a mother of 5 whos ages are 21 yr boy, 19 yr girl, 16 yr boy, 7 yr girl and 5 yr boy. The more you try to make her grown up now the harder she will rebell when she is a teenager. Instead of telling her not to get dirty at all find more creative way to let her get those urges out, like finger paints and paint with her. This will show her you enjoy spending time just because she is your little angel. Then when it is time to act grown up she will respond better. Think about the trade off here, a little clay, finger paint or a day at the park now in return for not having to worry about OMG what kind of psycopath will she bring home tonight latter. Kids are kids, let them enjoy this time, it only come once then they become us. She is 5 and not anywhere near ready for that.

Answer 4

Lucky L. Every one the answers I have read so far have said to let your 5 year old be a child. She's five for gawd sake. My daughter is seven and she is very well behaved and treats older people with respect but that's not because I'm pushing her be become a little adult. Besides its not possible - a child brain is not mature enough to think the way adults do so you'd fail dismally there.

Answer 5

Come on, she's a 5 year old... she is still a child! Why would you want a 5 year old to behave like an adult? How was you at 5 year old? Don't you also turn out become a fine lady?

Answer 6

I hope you won't take offense at my answer, but a 5-yr-old is not a "little adult." She is a child and has only one childhood. While there's nothing wrong with learning manners and how to behave in polite society, there also is nothing wrong with her wanting to play in a sandbox and get all dirty! That is what little kids do, and believe it or not, it's not only ok but good for them! They need time to just play..what about that is objectionable for you? A finishing school is not the place for a 5-yr-old. It is more suitable for a young lady of teenage years. I think you need to relax your parenting style. You sound like a caring person who only wants the best for her child, but children need "down" time in which to be kids and that sometimes means playing outside and getting dirty. Little girls need this, too, not only boys.

Answer 7

Short answer: wait thirty years.

Longer answer: she sounds like a healthy, delightful little girl, particularly if she's as well-mannered as you say she is. Most children, male and female, like to indulge in a variety of types of play. It helps them explore the nature of their world, figure out how things work, and even relax a bit. Sometimes that means getting dirty. And actually, as dirty goes, a sandbox isn't so bad.

It may be hard for you to watch, if you're a meticulously tidy sort of person, but please do try to allow her her "urges". These will disappear all too quickly; in five or six years you may be arguing with her over appropriate attire and wondering what happened to the little girl who occasionally liked to sneak out to the sand pile.

If this continues to be a serious worry for you - after all, everyone has their own ideas about what constitutes an appropriate upbringing for their children - talking to your minister or your child's teachers about your concerns might be a good idea. I have a feeling they'll reassure you that you've done a good job and your little girl is just fine as she is.

Answer 8

She five? Let her be a kid for crying out loud! We spend a very long time being grown ups and serious and having responcibilities. Childhood doesn't last that long. Cherish her for who she is. Good manners are wonderful but at five, she is a little girl, NOT a young woman! Being five is all about learning and getting messy is a part of that. Maybe you should play in the sandbox with her, you never know, she might teach you a thing or two.

Answer 9

Lady I think that you need some very serious help. You have a five year old and you want her to be grown. You, must let your child be a child while she can. Too, many children are growing up way to fast these days. This is why there is such a high pregnancy rate in our youth. There is nothing wrong with manners and good behavior, but you are pushing way to hard to have a child that is 5 act grown. You could cause her some very serious mental issues later on in life. You might want to look for a psychiatrist in the northern georgia area for yourself.

Answer 10

At the tender age of 5 she is no more an adult than you must be for thinking she should never misbehave or get dirty. She is a child and that is what children do. Let her have her childhood . Kids grow up way tooo soon as it is. As long as she has manners and respect the rest will follow at the appropriate time of her life. Let her just be 5.

Answer 11

Your daughter should act like an adult when she becomes one!!!!
At five years old she is a child. Childhood is but a brief time in our lives so let her play in the sandbox and get dirty. I remember making mud pies, it was great fun. Perhaps it was preparation from the play time to the real time when you actually baked a real pie!!! You are joking right? Finishing school!!! While she is growing up you teach her right from wrong and the rest all falls into place with your gentle and timely guidance. Lighten up mom.