I was at my friend Tamara's house yesterday. Her family is very Christian and usually nice. Her mom overheard me say "b***sh**" and swatted my behind with a wooden spoon and said I should watch my language when I am a guest in someone else's home. I was so startled I said the "s***" word and she swatted me again harder! I told her she had no right to do that and she was like well I am lucky I am not her daughter otherwise she would "really tan my bottom and wash out my mouth with soap." So I said "I am glad you're not my Mom." Then she asked me to leave until I learn some manners and respect and she called my Dad and told him I was rude and need to be punished. She also told my Dad I dress inappropriately, like my jeans and tops are too tight. Now I am grounded tonight and tomorrow...which is way too harsh!. My Dad wants me to apologize to her. I am thinking maybe but she should apologize to me too? I really like Tamara and want to be able to go over there and not feel weird. Unfair!
2006-08-26 11:34:44 · 35 answers · asked by Lori 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
And yes I told my dad she smacked me twice and he was OK with it! He didn't agree it was good but he was like well it wasn't abusive so it's not that huge a deal. FYI, my mom is not around any more.
2006-08-26 11:44:52 · update #1
And she said I am not allowed in their house until I apologize. My Dad she told him I need a lickin' with a belt....freak.
2006-08-26 12:00:34 · update #2
Wow...some of you did not give very nice answers. All I did was swear she slapped me twice so I told her what I thought! what is so bad about that??? I am sooo disappointed in the following answers and people should rate them all thumbs down!
soapintruck
falchic
stevo
bluebris
idamahn
adelle
foluso
old man
1ncebit2iceseye
tammy
jill*
2006-08-26 14:57:31 · update #3
Bad situation, you were rude for cursing in her house (for future reference save that for outside) and she was wrong for hitting you. You should calll your friend's mother and apologize for cursing and say you will not do it ever again, and just tell her, please do not hit me again, that was not right, and that startled me. After you are off grounding, explain to your father that she should not have hit you, since you are not the woman's child. Reporting her is too drastic, and dumb. It was a bit unfair, but don't curse too loudly in anyone else's house other than your own.
You do not know what will happen.
Hope this helps!
2006-08-26 11:46:52 · answer #1 · answered by bonycask 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your friends mom had every right to be mad that you used the first word, but that doesn't give her the right to smack you. Plus she should have realized the second of a sudden out burst. The response you gave her about the washing your mouth out with soap thing, wasn't rude at all. You could have also added that it was rude for her to have smacked you and that if you wanted you could press charges for assult, which can happen since she isn't your parent. As for the clothes, it wouldn't be your fault if they were too "tight" that just about the only way they come of the shelf anymore for teenage girls. You don't have to apologize for anything that you said (which should only be for the first word) but she should apologize to you for hitting you with the wooden spoon, which she probably didn't tell your dad about. One way to make sure your parents know is to have every single person in the room, honestly, say what she did to you. You shouldn't have been grounded, because the whole situation wasn't your fault. Come to think of it, your friend's mom may use the word, but might want to look and act like that she's never heard it before. Good Luck!
2006-08-26 11:46:29 · answer #2 · answered by Allyson B 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, I think this mother seems kind of strict, and it's not very polite going around beating people you hardly know, whether they are grown ups or teenagers. You should make sure that Tamara doesn't have a too hard time with her parent, seeing how these people might be treating their daughter harsher than they treated you. On the other hand, you should respect the way that family chooses to run their household. You could be careful not to swear in front of the parents (I could never swear while an adult was listening). That would be the polite thing to do. Maybe you and Tamara can hang out at your house? Hope this could help. :-)
2006-08-26 11:44:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Being able to see your friend for a simple apology (for language) is a small price to pay. I would make the overture and watch your mouth when you're in their (or anyone else's house). Cursing is something that I do at times but it's always under control and there are English words that can be used in any situation that show your intellect and capability to be polite. Just a thought...
2006-08-26 11:41:20 · answer #4 · answered by westgaliberty 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If I were your mom (and I am a mom), I would be so upset that someone else felt they had the right to hit you. I would be all over that woman and possibly in my anger call the police. She had absolutely no right to hit you. If she were that upset by your language then she should have just immediately asked you to leave her house until you can respect her rules. This woman needs to beg yours and your family's forgiveness. I would just stay away from this girl, move on and make new friends that don't have wacky parents.
2006-08-26 11:48:59 · answer #5 · answered by luveeduvee 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
yes...you should apologize to her and tell her you didn't mean to disrespect her in her own home. Knowing how her family was I can't beleive you weren't a little more attentive to your language. You shouldn't be saying those things anyway....As for her swatting you with the wooden spoon I don't think that was right. And her comment about how lucky you were she wasn't your mom was like an insult to your own mother. I would tell her that she hurt your feelings by saying that to you.
2006-08-26 11:41:48 · answer #6 · answered by WonderTwit 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
She didn't have the right to smack you at all. All she needed was to tell you not to speak like that in her home. When she did that you should have called your dad to pick you up. She was out of line doing that. I would personally tell her don't ever touch my child, you call me instead. That's what she should have done. If I were you I wouldn't go to that house again, no matter how close you and her daughter are. I think your dad should have talked to her about it with you both together. Good luck sweetie!
2006-08-26 11:56:22 · answer #7 · answered by Humming Bird 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
OK, First of all she did over step a line when she "smacked" you butt. There is no excuse for touching another person in that manner whether offended by them or not. It would have been in her best interest to say to you "excuse me but we do not use that type of language in this house" There for the second cuss word I'm sure would have never happened, and I'm sure you would have said "I'm sorry for using that kind of language in your home, I will not do it agian". All would have been done and over with, and the second cuss word probably never would have happened, but it it did she had every right to ask you to leave but not to smack you again. And in my eyes the comments to your dad about your clothing was just for her to insure you got in to trouble. I would be livid if that happend to any of my children and I think your father should re-think grounding you. I think she needs to apoligize to you however you do need to say sorry for using curse words in her home. Reguardless I would never be able to go over there again and feel comfortable being there and if it was one of my children I wouldn't want them or let them go over because of "if it happened once it can happen again" type of feeling. Good Luckk and I hope it all works out for you.
2006-08-26 12:29:18 · answer #8 · answered by wiazardofoz 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
not to be too harsh but come to my house respect me, my home and if you can't out the door you go.My suggestion is most of us people over 30 were taught to respect our elders, so learn some manners and above all apologize, this was a small misunderstanding so deal with it.
2006-08-26 12:24:57 · answer #9 · answered by matt 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When you are a guest, you behave like one, I'll let no body disrespect my house in some manners. If I was Tamara's mom, I'll completely forbid her of bringing you over to the house.
Forget the fact that she over reacted, it's her house!!
2006-08-26 11:44:14 · answer #10 · answered by Mother of three 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋