2006-08-26 07:15:27 · 12 answers · asked by HELLO 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I am not a muslim, but I will tell you the words of one of my muslim friends. He lets his daughter has a boyfriend and dates him, but he expects her not to have sex with him before marriage. He explains that by saying that you shouldn't ban anybody to love or to be loved and that the worst thing you could do is to kill somebody's feelings by not letting him or her to express them. Above this, he thinks that his daughter could and even should have more boyfriends (but not at the same time) because she will learn more about people and relations this way. Finally, she will meet and choose her husband this way (as he doesn't believe in arranged marriages and he thinks that the girl should choose her husband herself; he thinks that he and his wife should after that decide if the guy is the right one for her; they can object if they think something is wrong because they are older and more experienced than her, but she is the one who chooses the first and they are there just to check the things; they would never force her on anything). Please note that he lives in the Middle East, not in any western country.
So, what do you say?
I think you should date, but not because of other people who make fun of you, but because of yourself, as love is one of the most beautiful things in this world... So, I think it would be pity not to enjoy it.
I recommend you to talk to your parents (to your mother, I guess), explane your thoughts and feelings about this and ask if you can date some boy, but without having sex with him. They might let you have a boyfriend that way. I don't know where you are living, but I guess it is some western country, so, at least there is no social pressure about (not) dating. So, your parents might let you have a boyfriend this way...
And if they don't... I don't know what to say. I would recommend you to have a secret relation(s), but it is easy for me to say that, isn't it? I have never been in that kind of situation, so I cannot really recommend anything. Maybe you should wait until you don't get a little older and get on your own...
And then consider the next statement: love is never wrong and always nice...
And yes, about getting pregnant (mentioned in an answer above)... If you only date somebody without sex, you don't have to worry about getting pregnant, of course. And if you have sex, you don't have to worry neither. If you are well informed about sex and you know what to do (use preservative), you won't get pregnant this way neither. So, just get well informed about all these stuff and you will be safe.
2006-08-29 02:36:08 · answer #1 · answered by Miss Smart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really believe it is haaram to date---it is. Live by your beliefs. I do not think I have ever heard of a halal date. Maybe your parents would think it is a ''good'' date if you are with a group.
But, I think your best answer back to people is, ''I will not date anyone who is not a Muslim''. That does not refer to bad and good in Islam, as it would be hard to explain that to them.
2006-08-26 07:23:59 · answer #2 · answered by Shossi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Assalamu' Alaikum:
I'm glad you decided to seek answer instead of trying to please people. Mashallah you are the only Muslim in your school. No, there is no halal ways of dating. Ignore the people. As a Muslim, it is your duty to set a good example. You are different from others. In Islam, if one wants to be in the company of the opposite gender, the only halal way to do so is to get married. Inshallah talk to your parents/elders. Don't be pressured by the haram ways of your surrounding. If you can't get married now, then fast and do alot of dhikr (rememberance of Allah) and make a lot of duas to stay on the straight path. Imagine, if you keep yourself away from all this haram and keep yourself pure, inshallah you will receive so much reward.
I hope this helps, inshallah.
Take care!
2006-08-26 07:23:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you asking about the eating date ???
or are you asking about the concept of going out with the opposite sex....
the first one is Halal ..if you pay for it or some one has payed for it.....and has allowed you to eat it...
the second one...you are right and you should .....not indulge in that sort of activities....
its haram....and there is no way you can ...go around it...
so technically you are doing the right thing..
good luck ...even though the temptation is there
2006-08-26 07:23:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont worry what others think or say if people are making fun of you they are the ones that are insecure. Follow what you believe and be happy knowing you are doing what is good for you.
2006-08-26 07:18:31 · answer #5 · answered by Cat D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no there is no a halal date... where are you living? you should stick to the teaching of quran and ignore them at the end you will make something with your life and they will end up pregnant or fathers and mothers and want enjoy their lives like you... I'm a Muslim too
2006-08-26 07:24:35 · answer #6 · answered by ♥ amal_dxb ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they will all be jealous of you when they are pregnate at 15 and have diseases and you're making tons of money and living a good life.
2006-08-26 07:19:39 · answer #7 · answered by failurbydsign427 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is ok , i know muslims that go out on dates and even have sex but they dont tell thier families because they like sex but their families are muslims , i would just say god wants us to do what we think is best and whose consequences we wont repent later.
2006-08-26 07:32:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
i m hindu but i know muslims believe in "Allah is most mercifull". so Allah will have mercy on u even if u do something wrong.
2006-08-26 07:23:22 · answer #9 · answered by crackluver007 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgive them, and know that God is wary of thy deeds.
2006-08-26 07:18:30 · answer #10 · answered by Tofu Jesus 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋