My wife was diagnosed as bipolar three months ago. At this time she has started up a relationship with a homeless man who is very questionable in character whom she carried on an affair with for the last year. She has walked out on me and her three children and has completely torn our and her family apart. The sad part is I still love my wife very much and understand that she is not well. She has relocated back to our small community with her new man and acts like nothing has happened. In our coummunity we are very respected people because we are business owners. She has now went from most respected to least respected and it really hurts me to hear this about her. Her behavior at this time is irrational. She bought a car and started a job, but has already quit with out another one lined up. I'm very scared for her. I would love to get her help but she says she is fine. Do I just walk away with what dignity I have left and let her be.
2006-08-26 03:46:31 · 13 answers · asked by CJ B 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Wow, this sounds like a terrible situation for all involved. At this point what matters most is what your kids need. For your kids sake, you may want to seek some family counseling and/or a support group in your area. Check out this site to help you get started
http://www.nami.org/
I am so sorry that you and your family are going through this, I wish you the best of luck.
2006-08-26 03:59:09 · answer #1 · answered by Josie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't MAKE someone seek treatment, unless there is a Baker act available to you as there is in Florida. I don't think that would even work for you. This is a very bad situation and I feel for you. I guess you have to look at it like this....How can I get the most good out of a bad situation?. Put the children first. Do everything that is REASONABLE within your power to help your wife. Protect yourself and your business. If it ends up that you have done what you can to help her to no avail, DO NOT feel guilty about cutting her out of your life. Just make sure the kids understand what is going on. If you try and hide things from them, their imaginations will make it worse.
2006-08-26 10:57:44 · answer #2 · answered by Gatorgal 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really do not have a choice but to hold you head high and let her live her life. Some has to provide stability for your kids. You really should get counseling for you and your kids. Just imagine as hard as it is for you to deal with this and you are an adult. The kids are even going to have a harder time because they are just kids. You never know with medication, your wife may come back to her senses and you guys can continue where you left off. Do not put your life on hold while waiting for this tho, because it may never happen. Mental illness is a mysterious thing. Please make sure that you provide as much stability for your kids as you can. Do not be quick to run out and begin dating, at least in front of the kids. They already see their mother with someone else. It would be harmful to see you do the same thing. Pray for your wife, and hold on. My heart is broken for you and your kids.
2006-08-26 10:56:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand the pain you are going through. I lived 15 years with a man who was paranoid/ schizophrenic. When he was well, he was a wonderful man, but he got worse as the years went on, then he started becoming abusive to our children. That is when I left. Abuse to me, I can handle, not to the children though. I walked away, and after a couple of years, I discovered that my life now is so much better then it was. I know you love your wife, but if she won't get help, then step back, get on with your own life. When you live with someone who has mental problems, you yourself can develop problems, so please, just walk away. In time you will realize it was the best thing you could have done.
2006-08-26 10:55:50 · answer #4 · answered by Linda 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am sorry to say this because you clearly are still in love with you're wife but just steer clear you really don't want that kind of erratic behaviour near your children do you also when dealing with bi polar-ism you must understand it is not the women you fell in love with anymore you are now dealing with the mental illness
and i am just guessing but i doubt you are a licensed psychiatrist so if you really want to help her read up on bi polar-ism educate yourself to recognize the signs of an episode and be there to pick up the pieces oh and bi polar-ism is genetic and can be passed down to you re children monitor you re kids closely early detection is key to being able to effectively manage the disorder and it has been proven that the younger someone gets diagnosed the better the chances are of finding the correct course of treatment and medicine to alleviate the symptoms which as i am sure you know can be devastating god bless (if u believe in god)and good luck !!!!!!!! you will get through this but it is imperative that you educate yourself might i suggest a trip to the local library
2006-08-26 11:03:51 · answer #5 · answered by angelina_mcardle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just answered your other part of the question a minute ago, now after reading this, and seeing what all you have tried and seeing what all she is doing, even though I'm B-Polar, I would not put up with me!! I would get out of the relationship as soon as I could, and move on with your life!! Keep your kids safe too!!
2006-08-26 11:06:49 · answer #6 · answered by socratesmanx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a sufferer from Bi-Polar disorder if your wife is not willing to accept treatment and counsleing for her disorder it is really time for you to cut your losses. As much as you may love her you need to think about your children first.....if she is not thinking rationally you could put the kids in danger especially if she is not taking her medication or not taking it as it is perscribed this isn't a chance you want to take is it? She obviously doesn't care about you enough to get help as harsh as this sounds honey cut your losses and move on. As much as it is going to hurt you now in the long run you will better off. Also you may want to check with your mental health place in your town alot of places have support systems for family members of bi polar disorder sufferers.
2006-08-26 11:03:29 · answer #7 · answered by fatchick 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I went through pretty much the same problems with my Bipolar
wife about 6 yrs ago..
I was determined and after a couple of years of doctors, affairs,
drugs, psychiatric hospital stays and misery, she is back and under control...
I would not do it again...
I would cut her loose and never look back..
2006-08-26 10:55:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your wife won't get help you need to protect yourself legally. You can still try to support her, but you could jeopardize your business and finances because of her actions. Being a business owner, I can't believe you haven't considered future complications to your credit, home, etc. TAKE LEGAL ACTION NOW!
2006-08-26 10:51:05 · answer #9 · answered by HamTownGal 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
love hurts, doesn't it.. but there is nothing you can really do 2 make someone love you back.. you can sit and wait it out.. but you might grow old alone.. go out with your friends and try 2 have fun.. and invest some of your time doing fun things with the kids.. keep yourself busy will help also...
2006-08-26 10:57:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋