is it wrong to have a good friend of the opposite sex?

Question

ive known him for almost a year now. him and i are really close. im starting to have feelings about him. is it wrong. should i avoid him? should i tell him?

Answer 1

This is always a tricky situation, and its often feared that the friendship might be ruined if the other person doesn't feel the same way. I think that if you two are 'best friends' and really close and have a healthy relationship, then if he doesn't feel the same way, maintaining the friendship should be easy.

I think you should tell him and for all you know he could be feeling the exact same way, and having the same fears! So take the risk. If you don't then you are risking a really good chance to be with someone in a relationship that you really care for.

Plan the right way to do it for you- whether that be on the phone, face to face, through a hand written letter, email or msn...whichever is best for you, the point is that you do it and get it out in the open of your relationship.

Just remember of all the great possibilities, that's why you should do it.

Answer 2

There is nothing wrong with having a good friend of the opposite sex! Nothing wrong in having feelings about your guy friend either. Don't avoid him, be honest. Otherwise he'll just pick up weird signals and wonder what is really going on. Just take a deep breath and take the plunge. Tell him that you've started to think of him in *that way* and see if he wants to do anything about it. If he does, that is awesome. It would be the basis for a great relationship. On the other hand, you should be prepared for it if he doesn't want to. He may be afraid to risk the friendship if the relationship were to go South. Good luck, and remember, fortune favors the bold!

Answer 3

Yes tell him You might as well tell him because you are no longer interested in just being his friend. When you had no boyfriend like feelings you could listen to him tell you about other women. Now you would not be able to hear it without the jealousy. So just face it you will never be what you were even if he doesn't want more from you. So go ahead and let him know. By the way I don't believe that people of the opposite sex can be just friends. Somebody is always going to start to feel that warm loving feeling that you just don't feel for your friends of the same sex. Even when two people of the opposite sex are friends and one them is a homosexual and truth they see one another as the same sex not opposite

Answer 4

The fact that you are good friends and can continue to be for almost a year indicates that you are attracted to each other. You tell each other it is going to be a platonic relationship but you are actually fooling yourselves, Eventually you will move to the next level and before you know it, it becomes a relationship.

I assumed that your are married or is in a relationship with someone else. So, it is entirely up to you whether to avoid him or to tell him. I believe if you tell him about how you feel, he will reciprocrate the feelings.

Ask yourself these few questions and make your decision.

1) Are you happy with your present relationship?
2) Are you still very much in love with your spouse or present
partner?
3) Is he the right one for you and will he be able to give you love
and happiness?
4) Most important, how you feel?

Answer the above questions honestly and your answer is there.
I answered the above based on the assumption that you are presently attached. Otherwise I can't imagine why you are not able to expresse your feelings.

Good luck

Answer 5

There is nothing wrong in having a friend of opposite sex, but when thoughts like u talk of emerges then u have to think of the relation with fresh beginning, and it is not wrong to discuss the same with u r friend. Friendship has great values, and one should not underestimate it at any point of time.

Answer 6

It is healthy to have friends of the opposite sex. Depending how close you are/ if you feel you can speak to him on that level than tell him. Give him some compliments and see where it goes... I like your clothes. You look nice today. If he perks up abit then you know he liked that. Feel him out a bit so you won't be dissappointed.

Answer 7

There is nothing wrong. U known him for 2 years and now seems you have open your heart and u start to have feelings for him. WHy avoid him?

Its not easy to love someone.

God Bless

Answer 8

Well,I don't know how close U both R but if I assume that U both R so close friends that U can't confess this feelings of your to him..........then I must say that there needs to be some serious conv. between U & your friend...........& ask him if he has any feelings for U or not?................& ASK HIM TO BE VERY FRANK

If he answersIN AFFIRMATIVE that's GREAT!!!

If he answers IN NEGATIVE,then U should take some more time to decide your pos. & making your next move

If he's in a dilemma,grab the chance & make your feelings known to him ...........it's the best chance U'd get

Answer 9

I see nothing wrong with being good friends with people of the opposite sex .. however if you are starting to have feelings for that person maybe its a great time to discuss your feelings with that person. Who knows maybe they are sharing the same.

Hugs Mel

Answer 10

if both of you are single and you enjoy being with each other and wanting to get into relationship, sure go ahead and tell him. or you can wait for him to confess too (provided that he feels the same way). do not avoid him, that's juz hurting him. it is not wrong to have some feelings after being together for long time, it juz happens.