Do you think I should call the police ?

Question

My boyfriend grabbed my neck , like he was choking me and I just has neck surgery 2 months ago. He is not supposed to be living with me because of previous Domestic violence incidents. It hurts but I'm thinking he didn't damage the surgery. If I call the police he would be sent to Jail for a long time. We were arguing about a stupid cell phone call he made. I was afraid he would paralyse me. This would be the third time for domestic violence. He's here now and wont leave. I am afraid to call cuz he might do something to me if he catches me. Help! I live in howell MI and the domestic violence issue is taken very seriously! so mayby i fh

just to let you know he is on probation for his last domestic violence charge, my neighbor called police on that one and then he violated his probation by knocking down my other neighbor a few months later and for that he was ordered not to be in my house or see me for the rest of his probation so he is not suppose to be here but he wont leave and threatens me if I try to make him

Answer 1

You are a precious person that has the right to live your life without fear of the one you love. If he is beating on you and this is the third time then you have the right to call the police.

There is a foundation that will help you to get out and start over. Its called SPRING. I put the website in the source.

Don't stay! It will cost you your life and yours is precious.

Answer 2

Well, I read the part of your question that says that he is there, now, against your will, and that you are afraid to call the police. First, establish whether or not you feel you can safely leave the house.
If not, then how many phones do you have? Do you have a cordless phone or a cellphone? If so, try to sneak it into your pocket, then go to the restroom and lock yourself in. Dial 911, then speak quietly, yet audibly to the operator (maybe flush the toilet or run water to cover the sound of the conversation).
Give your name and location first and tell them you are in danger and to send the police.
I would recommend you stay locked in the bathroom and stay on the line with the 911 operator at least until the police come.
Whatever you do, please make sure you get into a safe place.
I don't know if there is a way to contact the police via the internet. Maybe you could contact me, with your info and I could try and call the police for you.

**EDIT: Ok, I was about toleave, but I stuck around a while to see if you'd contact me (using Yahoo contact). I have to leave now, so I won't be near a computer, but maybe, if you are still in the situation, you could contact one of the "contactable" folks who've submitted an answer here.

Good luck! And stay safe!!

Answer 3

Are you crazy? Has he already knocked you senseless? This is why police don't like to respond to domestic calls. "He's not supposed to be living with me because of previous domestic violence incidents." Now you've had neck surgery and you, not a doctor or surgeon, don't think he hurt it.
You need to do more than call the police. You need to enroll in some classes at a domestic violence women's shelter, salvation army, or other such facility. This cycle of abuse is going on because YOU are also an active participant. Not because you don't walk on eggshells around this man, but because you enable the violent behavior in ways you don't have a clue about.

Call your doctor in the morning.

Call the police tonight. Perhaps prince charmings long stay in jail will give you time to understand that you are sick too in this situation and how to heal yourself.

Answer 4

You need to care about yourself, because this jerk obviously does not. Think about it, you just had surgery and he went for that area. He has a history of violence. You are only guessing that no further injury occurred to the surgery area.

Think a little more. His third domestic violence incidence is not your fault but rather his inability to control himself. It will not stop with this last incident!!!

You need to take this seriously. What do you need to convince you to stop putting up with criminal behavior. It doesn't matter what the argument was about or how trivial it was. He assaulted you. There is NO excuse for that.

Get away from him to someplace safe and call the police. Otherwise, you won't be worrying about being paralysed, because when you are dead you don't have any worries at all.

He needs serious counselling but my dear, so do you. Ask the police for referral to a battered women's organization or a victim's advocate. But you need to stop wondering and get help.
As for this creep, look at it this way: if getting arrested is his wake-up call, you may just be saving him from a long time in prison and/or becoming a murderer. And who knows how many other women you might be protecting?

Answer 5

Yes you should call the police. If there has been domestic violence in the past, he should know by now not to put his hands on you, especially since you just had surgery. As for him being there and not leaving, they couldn't force him to leave if he has an established residency there under the california penal code, dont know what it's like in Michigan.
But, if he doesn't want to get arrested for something, and it really isn't arrestable if it isn't as bad as you say, he could agree to leave.
Either way, under California Penal Code section he could be arrested for PC 243(e)(1) domesitc abuse, even if he didnt' leave a mark on you.
Sounds like he needs to go to jail tonight, you are obviously scared of him. I would call, people like that dont get better, they get worse, believe I know, I'm an officer.

Answer 6

You need to get yourself into a safe place pronto. Preferably get away from him, out of the house, and then call 1-800-770-3030. You'll get WTCS (Women's Transitional Care Services) based out of Lawrence, Kansas. They have national domestic violence resources. I don't know local dv resources for Michigan. Also, yes, call the police. Even if you summon the courage to leave him for good (which I hope you do), he's going to find someone else to hurt if you don't turn him in.

Answer 7

If you are that scared of him and he continues to abuse you, then yes you should report him. If he isn't supposed to be with you because of previous issues he could be in alot of trouble just for that. He doesn't sound as if he respects or really even cares about or for you. Think about it, you recently had surgery and he's hurting you, if he keeps getting by with this you could wind up worse than paralyzed one day and that alone would be bad enough! Put a stop to this now and get him out of your life, no one should have to live this way, that isn't love at all!!!! You are worth more than that, kick him out for good and prove to him and yourself that you are a valuable human being. Don't lose your own self respect because of him. Get your courage up and don't lose your self esteem in the process, just get rid of him. He has to sleep or go to work some time doesn't he? Remember, this won't stop unless "you" do something to make it stop. Take care of your self and believe in your self, you can do this. Don't worry about what will happen to him for being with you, he sure isn't, and besides it's kind of like (for him) being in the wrong place at the wrong time!!! He deserves it. You go girl and get him OUT for good!!!!!!!!! Hope you will let us know how it worked out for you and I pray that all will go the best way for YOU.

Answer 8

I can't undersatnd why you haven't already. Apparently you like to be abused, or you like being with losers, or you are an idiot. Maybe you would like statistics. 98.7% of abusive people don't change, which means that if you think it will get better, you are wrong. Abusive relationships account for more than 80% of traumatic domestic injuries, so if you think it will get better, you are out to lunch. So, obviously, everyone thinks you should call the cops, but if you haven't already, then plan on ending up as a statistic.

Answer 9

if this is real and i do not think it is because by the time you wrote all of this you could have alreadt called the police. how would you get away with typing all of this and what would you do if he walked in while you were typing. i just read your plea for help again and you are so full of s h i t. i like the way you left the cliff hanger at the end. funny stuff. if you needed help you would have put an address in there first thing. you should not put stuff like this on here. should i call yahoo and have them trace you to your house. i bet i could get you locked up for this. let me think on it for a bit.

Answer 10

Yes, he's not going to change, and he is going to seriously hurt you. There are too many good men out there that won't hurt you to stick with a loser that will. In this order : 1)Go to the ER, 2) Call the Police, 3) Dump his a**.