What do u think about sex befoer marriage?

Question

I'm a christian and I'm going to be having sex with my boyfriend for the first time soon

i'm using an implanon and he had an injection so he can use condoms

At the moment I have no idea where i am at with God. I've been a christian for 3 years and I understand bout the whole sex before marriage but I just can't wait

what will happen if i do?

my Boyfriend is not a christian but he belives in some sense. I know he would never pressure me to have sex. he's even said he'll wait if he has to

I'm 18 and he's 20 months younger than I am

Answer 1

Honestly, I would highly warn against it. I wish I had waited for my husband. I know a girlfriend of mine, her and her husband, were both virgins when they married. And the relationship they have just after one year of marriage flat out beats my first year of marriage to my husband (which was 7 years ago). I know first hand the bruises that can be left on a woman's soul from allowing herself to give of herself to another outside of wedlock.

Take a peek with me if you will into God's Word a moment:

Act 15:20 Instead we should write to them, telling them to abstain from food polluted by idols, from sexual immorality, from the meat of strangled animals and from blood.

Galatians 5:19-21 The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Ephesians 5:3 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people.

It comes down to this, though we are saved by grace and our sins washed away by the blood of Jesus Christ when we repent of them; if we know the warning signs and still do not heed them, the struggle and strife in our lives will be that much greater than if just chose to heed the warnings. God tells us like it is. He does not lie. He has told us time and time again as you can see in His Word, sexual immorality (ie: sex before marriage is also included in this immorality. Because marriage is a covenant with God through a Holy union of man and woman. ) will lead to struggle and strife...and a distancing from Him and His Kingdom.

I messed up, my husband did too. Though we did mess up, we know now the ramifications of such decisions. It comes down to this, we know what it is like. It is not pretty, it is not pleasant. For a breif moment in time, you will enjoy a blissful state with your boyfriend now. But the question is, how long will he be your boyfriend? Will he marry you once he lays with you in your bed (or his)? Most guys that fall into this trap, and even women, fall into the trap of disrepescting the other gender. Men begin to resent women subconciously, as well as women toward men. And this begins an evil downward spiral that when a woman and man do eventually choose to marry...they had a challenging time respecting one another, because they had others before them. They did not save that most intimate part of who they are for the one and only they will spend eternity with for the rest of thier lives.

If you want to enjoy and encounter a blessed life, I strongly urge against having sex with your boyfriend. Resisit the tempation, do not fall into the hands of the enemy. He wants to keep you from freedom and a wonderful life; don;t let the enemy steal that joy away from you. You can still enjoy your boyfriend without sleeping with him. You can still grow with him. And if he pressures you into it, you know he is only after one thing. And he will not respect you any more than if you sleep with him if he pressures you. Let celibacy become a strength for you, something you can enjoy. Don't fall into the trap so many of us already have.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF I DO? (You asked)

You will have to repent of the sin you committed. Plain and simple. You will have to choose to be able to live with the pain that is associated with this sin. And as I said before...it will feel good for a breif moment. But that moment is not eternity. If I could go back and do it all over again, I would choose eternity then and abstain. The reason you feel you cannot wait is because satan is really trying to grab you away from God. Pray, fast, do whatever you have to...abstain from seeing your boyfriend if you have to for awhile. Keep yourself from tempatation. Condoms, oral sex...any of that junk...sex is sex. God does not write out speficis, He simply says "No! If you want a righteous life, no!" But to the opposite side of that...if you want it now...then you will choose a painful ramification. The choice is always there...just which one will you choose? Which voice will you listen to? Your's (satan's) or God's?

Answer 2

I commend you for thinking this through; just the fact that you are wondering if it is the right decision, instead of just going through with it, shows that you have decency and ethics.

However, that alone is not enough. Questioning something doesn't justify doing it.

Sex before marriage is wrong. In Christianity, in Islam, in Judaism, and just on a certain moral level in humanity. The fact that you believe in a faith that considers it a sin is more than enough.

In religion, there is no "give and take". You can't avoid one sin, and commit another.

I would advise against it, but the choice is ultimately yours.

Answer 3

Nowhere does the Bible teach that sex in itself is sin. Man in his sinful nature has taken what was intended to be a glorious and complete act of love between two people and has made it something cheap, low and dirty. The Bible is one of the outspoken books on the subject of sex, and it condemns sex outside the bonds of matrimony. The fact that immorality is rampart throughout the world doesn't make it right; the fact that some clergymen may condone it doesn't make it right.
By looking and talking with people, we all know the devastation that permissive sexual activity generally causes. It's like a cancer in the bodies and minds of those who indulge, without exception. Innocent bystanders such as your parents and other family members, friends who are all concerned for you. Who want only what's best for you. Anything less than a happy marital voyage would give them grief. The wisdom of their years says that premarital sex is always a mistake. God created sex to be good, it is not a sin, it is God's gift to the human race. It is for procreation; for enjoyment within the bonds of matrimony, for the fulfillment of married love.
Several false assumptions about sex are:
1. Chastity is not truncation: Too often it is assumed that to have refrained from sex outside marriage means that you are only half a person. Not so; Singleness - as long as it continues to be a Christian's situation - it is a " Charismatic Gift ", a charisma ( 1 Corinthians 7:7)
2. Innocence is not Ignorance: It is not the pursuers of purity who don't know about life - it is the " Promiscuous " who don't know what life is for.
3. Permissiveness is not Freedom: It is as the permissive society has continued, that it has become greyer, more monotonous, and less able to deliver.

Answer 4

I wouldn't. I have just gotten back with Jesus after years of straying from him. During that time, I met and fell in love with my fiance'. We did not wait long before we had sex. Like less than a week.
However, nearly a year later, we both found Jesus again and are trying to get our lives back in order. The fact that we have already had sex makes it much harder for us not to now, even though we have both agreed that it is something that we should put off until we can get married.
Right now, since you have not done it, it won't be that hard to continue to wait. Once you cross that line, it's hard to stop later on. It's not impossible, it's just REALLY hard!!
I would wait. Really...pray and ask God for help and understanding.

And trust me...YOU CAN WAIT.

Answer 5

I think that if your a Christian than you know whats right. I personally am waiting unti I get married!! You know want God wants for you and you know what you want for yoursefl. You just have to decide if your gonna do whats right or if your gonna give nto temptation. I personally thing you should wait...btw how old ae you

Answer 6

I think that issue is between you and God. But I'd also warn you, the age difference in some states (since it appears that he's under 18), can have you wind up in jail for statutory rape. You might want to go and look it up somewhere.

Use protection (condoms), and make sure you've got some other kind of birth control (the pill or Morning after pill) so you don't wind up pregnant.!

Answer 7

Clearly you are giving thought ahead of time. I bet some young Christians assume they won't and then let the emotions take over and have sex without planning ahead.

If you love your boyfriend and are sure he loves you, and you take precautions to have safe sex and avoid an unwanted pregancy, then you're adult enough to decide on your own.

By the way, I think it is good that you have sex before marriage, as its important to know that you are compatible lovers before you get married.

Answer 8

Islam does not approve of intimate mixing of the sexes, and forbids premarital or extramarital sex. Islam encourages marriage as a shield to such temptations and as a means of having mutual love, mercy and peace

Answer 9

Sex isn't the most imprtant thing in a relationship...but it only makes sense to me to make sure you are compatible in that department before committing to marriage.

Some say that you should wait until after marriage and learn what the other wants if you truly love them...but I beg to differ!

The bed is not a place for charity.

Sex should both selfish and selfless at the same time.

P.S. - Now that you mentioned his age...make sure you are not breaking the law. You will go to jail for having sex with a minor...and every state has their own definition of "minor".

Answer 10

All the "Christians" who would condemn you most likely had sex before they were married, too, but they probably won't admit it. Although it is not the recommended course of action, it does happen in most cases. I only know of one or two who have held out for marraige, and they are 50+ year old virgins now. Jesus came into the world, not to condemn, but to free us from condemnation.

Love, Hope, & Peace,

Cal-el & Swissy

Answer 11

Who can stop you? But, some do not believe this is best.

Best to save the thrill after the wedding. Then have a sweet little baby and become proud parents!