I'm a 23 year old guy and I just moved into a new house with two 20-something female roommates in a new town where I'm starting graduate school. We have our own private bedrooms but other than that the house is pretty small and most space is communal. I'm not old friends with these roommates. They're nice people, but only met over the internet and that's how I ended up here with them.
My question is:
If I get a girlfriend during the course of the year, what is the etiquette for what I can and can't do with my girlfriend here in the house? Could my (hypothetical) girlfriend spend the night here with me and have sex with me in my room? I'm a little worried because I think the walls are kind of thin.
And can we hang out in the communal space - cook, eat, watch TV, etc?
I will approach this subject with my roommates themselves once I know them a little better.
I'm just wondering what others think, and if there's any sort of common etiquette on this sort of thing. Thanks.
2006-08-25 14:08:45 · 17 answers · asked by worldpeace 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it goes without saying that we would keep it quiet and discreet!
i respect my roommates and want to be a good roommate
i would definitely bring it up with them first.
but do you think they ought to permit me to have a gf spend the night, or do you think they'd have grounds for saying no?
2006-08-25 14:30:28 · update #1
honey, no one can sit here and tell you that its alright to do all these things because we dont live with you. the best thing to do is talk to you roomies. explain to them what you explained here.
i dont think they would really mind your g/f being there or staying the night, but plz give a heads up to them when your planning on doing something "more"!
2006-08-25 14:14:49 · answer #1 · answered by ? 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'd say it's perfectly fine to have her over to hang out and cook, eat, watch TV, etc. But I do think that having members of the opposite sex in the house that it would be entirely rude to have sex and have her spend the night there. It would be fine if you did it at her house. But also, this is just my opinion, the females in the house may not mind at all, and then you also have to accept them having sex with men in the house too.
2006-08-25 14:12:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
common etiquette for any lady not just roomates is too respect them fullyif you do get a g/f then ask them and discuss with them what they think they can give real insight and wisdom as for the sex part well that is up to them you are threee people after all ask them if they would be offended if they say yes thenask her if you could find somewhere else but if they tell you no then do it themselves ask them what the difference is and then feel free if they say it's there apt then say fine i'll move never let one overrun the other it should be equal all around
2006-08-25 14:15:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you guys need to have a meeting and an agreement on this subject.
I would say an occasional night with being quiet as you can. And about the communal area and hanging out,,,,,the needs to be determined at your roomate meeting.
I would enourage you to write out the agreeement and sign it, so that in the future there will be no arguments over what the rules are. Also, rules can be ammended as time goes on.
2006-08-25 14:15:36 · answer #4 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This may sound like ancient history but I really got burned when my French housemate (No, I am not gay) showed up unexpectedly with his beautiful girl friend.
Of course, when he was having some doubts about if she was smart enough for him, I fell hard for her.
That really hurts so be careful with living around a bunch of women since they can be very unpredictable.
BTW, you have to set ground rules in any situation where you are sharing living arrangements.
2006-08-25 14:14:47 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Watch Three's Company.
2006-08-25 14:11:24 · answer #6 · answered by Jimmy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
best thing for you to do mate is ask what are the rules as to what you can and can,t do in the house. the rules need to be upheld by everyone.if they don,t want girlfriends and boyfriends in the house staying in the room and you gotta get some well get a hotel room for the night or find a romantic spot to have some nookie
2006-08-25 14:14:53 · answer #7 · answered by sammy11232003 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should ask them this question just as you did here.
If its a small space it would be lame to impose your social activities on other people who are trying to have a space they count on to be quiet and or a refuge from the normal intrusions of the world.
2006-08-25 14:15:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you're paying rent there, you can have any girl you want spend the night.
If she hangs around alot though, that might piss off the roommates.
Make sure the gf leaves the morning after without hanging around.
2006-08-25 14:12:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Of course talking to them is paramount. The thin walls are kind of freaky though. How would you like being kept up all night?
2006-08-25 14:12:10 · answer #10 · answered by Tall Guy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋