Kid friendship..a little adult friction. Any advice?

Question

My 6-year-old son has a friend he really wants to get together with to play. This friend's mom has apparently decided she's not keen on my son. I know, I'm my son's mom and therefore totally prejudiced! But he has never, ever had any problem making or maintaining friends. He's respectful and kind, most of all with kids younger or smaller than him. As best I can tell, this arose on the basis of 5 minutes' interaction at a birthday party when my son made a 3rd kid angry by saying he didn't like Legos.

So my question is this: I obviously don't want to let the chill that has descended between me and the friend's mom to ruin my son's relationship with her son--this is adult baggage, not kid baggage!--but I could use a little lesson in politics here. This lady is not going to react well to being confronted directly a la "what's your problem with my son"? I'm not interested in creating enemies here, just in salvaging a friendship for my son. Advice?

Answer 1

i used to hate the kids my kids hung out with it took me a while to accept it i wonder if its not your son but her..there is always a way to talk to people most of the time when confronted people tend to cave. maybe if you sell yourself to her it will influence her to let the kids play. and if that dosen't work you tell her i hate legos too. good luck.

Answer 2

Well, if yours has no trouble making and maintaining friends, let this one go if his mom doesn't like your son. He and this boy can be friends at school because the boys obviously get along fine. If your son REALLY wishes to see this other little kid outside of school then you should talk to the mom and see if that would be OK with her. If she says no then you'll just have to tell your little one that his friend's mommy said he can't come over and play because he is not allowed to right now - he must have other things to do. Try ecouraging your son to pick a different kid to invite over to play! Maybe after he establishes a great friendship with a different kid he will forget about asking to get together with the boy who has the mom who doesn't like your son.

Answer 3

I've got a few suggestions:
1 ~ Kill her and her son with kindness. She'll eventually melt.
2 ~ If you want, you can try and manipulate the situation and bring up the original incident to explain how hard it is when boys get together and the competetive behavior begins.
3 ~ Invite them both to the park for an afternoon so she can see that you and your son are not what she thinks of. (I did that and it worked with a family member)

Good Luck!

Answer 4

Invite the mum and the boy over for coffee and play so she can see your son in a new light and hopefully change her mind about him. There may have been something else to it that you don't know about. Little boys even the best of them can have pretty bad moments and sadly a lot of people judge them on that one thing. Give her a chance to see the real little boy that you know

Answer 5

what's the big deal about lego's, i understand where you are coming from trust me been there in worse ways i dont know your son or hers for that matter so i cant pass judgment there but i personally wouldnt want my child playing with a kid whose mom is probably in his ear telling him things about your son, maybe its best to confront her but in a parently way, not so much to make sure they remain friends because friends come and go but to get to the root of why she dislikes your son.

Answer 6

You can invite him for a playdate but don't push the mom. She will not like it and only keep her son away even more. Try to interest him in other kids.

Answer 7

Geez she sounds way too protective of her child. That is really stupid to cost your child a friendship because you say one kid misbehave for 5 seconds. Kids will be kids geez

Answer 8

there are so many other kids that your son can play with just let this die down