how do i get my teenage daughter to clean her room?

Question

ive tried deducting pocket money, restrictions of privledges , icant think of anymore please help.

Answer 1

Don't yell and scream or bribe her just tell her she will have to live with it and if she wants her things washed that are hiding in her room she will have to do it herself. It is her space. Also tell her you would really appreciate it if she could help you out. Sometimes they just want to see its a good thing to help out. Praise her when she does it. Some people feel safer cluttered in their own space. Ask her if she would like help but that you won't do it for her but with her. Make it a mom and daughter time. Do it together and show her some shortcuts along the way. Don't get into her personal things.

Answer 2

This might sound a bit ridiculous.... but have you taught her HOW to do it? Many times, young people are willing to do things like that, but they don't know how to begin, etc. They don't want to admit, and maybe they don't even realize, that they don't know how to do those simple tasks.

Start by saying, "Let's get this cleaned up, I'll help you." Teach her step by step, systematically: first you carry a plastic bag around and pick up the stuff that needs to be thrown away. Then you pick up all the clothes, throw them into the hamper (or hang up the ones that are not dirty). Then put things back where they belong, then vacuum or sweep the floor. Etc, etc, etc.

Sounds very basic, but really helps. And the time the two of you spend together cleaning her room can be very valuable quality time. You'd be surprised how many things about her life she will share with you at such times.... things she wouldn't have thought about telling you otherwise. It will make the two of you closer.

Beware about snooping, though!!! Make sure you never read notes or letters that you find in there. She will know if you have, and, more importantly, she will be able to tell if you haven't.
That will really help the trust between the two of you.

Answer 3

I was forced to keep my room clean. I am 34 now and I still hate cleaning it. I don't very often either. Don't make my bed either.

It is her personal space, but it is in your house.

Probably bribing with reward will work best, since it is something you want and she doesn't care about.

Maybe you should just tossing more stuff in her room. All the things you don't want to clean up. Ha! no, that would be bad and start a big fight.

I do take the shovel into my kids room and start hauling things away.

Answer 4

Insist she take up a detail-oriented hobby. Soon it will probably just be natural to keep it clean. Something like needlepoint, cross-stitch or quilting is good for learning patience plus it's a skill that might be good for stress relief later in life, or even to earn extra cash etc. Also consider that she might be tired, is she getting enough nutrition and exercise. Does she need to spend more time outdoors? Often I get a fresh perspective on my room after spending time outside

Answer 5

One of the biggest threats that my parents used to do was if I didn't clean things up they would come in with a trash bag and put everything in it and toss it. It was a big enough threat for me to do it, but the thing is you have to stick to the threat and if she doesn't clean it....away it all goes! Everything that's there except the matress and 1 blanket and pillow to sleep on....gone. That's definentely the best advice I have. Oh and my parents always threatned to take my door off of my room too. That was another one that I got.

Answer 6

Take her things away. If she has a mobile (cell phone) ipod, mp3 player, dvd's, cd's.

If that doesn't help, try talking to her. Ask her why it's so hard for her to do that. Tell her that at the end of the week, if she's keeps her room up, you'll go with her and buy her a top or a skirt. Don't spend too much on her.

Answer 7

plan a take pictures of it and promise her if it is not cleaned in 4 hours you will put it online for all to see, especially people she is trying to impress

plan b take all items that is not in place, remove them and lock them up somewhere
yes clothes, cd's, dvd's, and make up, etc....
leave the trash and garbage for her to deal with
keep the items locked up for one week, give them back to her and when room is messy again do the same thing. she will get tired of not having her stuff and this should work
you will love the neat room and she will have learned something

Answer 8

Gee hmmmm I have the same exact problem.

I YELLED VERY LOUD AT MY DAUGHTER!!!

Told her it had to be CLEANED BEFORE school started. She finally did it! Low & behold! Wonders never cease! LOL

For my 12 yr old son I helped him with his room. I MADE him stay in there with me. He whined a lot but I stuck it out.

Answer 9

Ground her, or take something she likes away. tell her she can have it back when she learns to keep her room clean. and that she has to kep it picked up. Or tell her that everything that is in the floor will be thrown away when you clean it. she won't like that when all of her things are gone.

Answer 10

My sister was like that and still is, i was always very clean and oganized when i was a kid.

Just tell her that your not trying to be a pain you just want her to grow some organizational skills for when she grows up, the sooner she starts the sooner she'll get used to it.

That or some tough love, stop doing her laundry/dishes that she likes (if she does). Make her do it, anything she makes dirty put on her bed, eventually she'll have to clean it.