How do you deal with losing someone so close to you? He was my solid ground...as a family we were so close we would call eachother everyday and i would go over his house at least 3 times a week...he always had the answers and no matter what i did or how much i let him down...he was always there....i miss him so much...i just dont know how to go on with out him....i have cryed for my father but not how your suppose to when you loose someone so close because i'm trying to be there for my mother...they were married for 30 years and did everything together...i was planning my wedding with him he was suppose to see me in my dress and walk me down the isle...he never got a chance to see his grandchildren and never will...its killing me inside...i cant picture living with out him...i dont know what to do....any advice would help...RIP Daddy...i love you
2006-08-25 08:20:30 · 16 answers · asked by E 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I turned 23 on July 31, 2006.
I'm sorry you lost your daddy, i can't even begin to imagine what i will do when my daddy dies. All i can tell you is that this has got to be one of the saddest things you will ever have to overcome. you'll see your daddy again when it's your time to go. until then, know he's still watching over you, so smile big for him, he knows you love him and miss him, but I'm sure all he wants is for his little girl to be happy. Be there for everybody else. You have to help them get through this too.
2006-08-25 08:29:01 · answer #1 · answered by general_stamey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry about your father.
I can tell you that he must have been a hell of a guy and that you both had a great relationship with each other. Being married for 30 years also says so much about this man and about how great of a father and husband he was.
He will always be with you and you will always have great memories of him and how he affected your life. The pain is normal and time will help ease some of it but the pain is also a reminder of how much he means to you. When he looks down upon you he would want to see you doing well and your Mom as well. Be there for each other so that you or your Mom don't have to face this alone. I am sure that your Dad was very proud of you and that you are going to be OK.
Celebrate how he lived his life and how he touched people's lives around him - he would rather see you smile than be sad.
I wish you the best.
2006-08-25 08:36:19 · answer #2 · answered by jarhed 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm very sorry for your loss. I buried both of my parents before I turned 30, so yeah, I get what you're saying.
How do you deal? You just do. You have no other reasonable options, I'm afraid. It's great that you are trying to be there for your mom, but please, make sure you take the time to take care of your own needs, too.
I'm not a super religious person, not by any stretch of the imagination, but I do believe in an afterlife. Your father is still with you. He can still see you. He'll be at your wedding and he will see his grandchildren. Yes, I know, it bites that you won't be able to see him or have a conversation with him, but he'll be there.
Let yourself feel the pain. Cry, yell, sulk, whatever. The pain will never go away completely, but with time, it will become more of a dull ache.
Remember - death is a powerful thing, but it is not powerful enough to stop love.
2006-08-25 08:46:13 · answer #3 · answered by Tish 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HI E,
wow. It was like reading about my life. I was 27 when my dad died and my world ended. I had dads death, divorce and hysterectomy in 3 months!
It is so hard. The memories will be all you have. Pray and be strong and hold on to family. There are no words and Life is so hard without them. It is not something that you get over.
It has been 27 years since my dad passed, and I mourn for him still!!!
He will be at the wedding!!! He will see the grandchildren. He will always be with you. Try to go on and be happy. If you need to talk I am an e-mail away. I feel your suffering! Be strong!!!!!
2006-08-29 06:32:40 · answer #4 · answered by -------- 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how it feels the best you can do is cry till you can't cry anymore then cry some more thats how I got over my best friend dying she and I were so close it hard at first and time does heal all wounds but it will take time how much is up to you and don't let anyone tell you that it taking to long for you to get over it do it with the help of the family and close friends and just know that he would want you to be happy and sad just because he passed away does mean he gone you still have all the memories of him and so he will always be with you
2006-08-25 08:30:02 · answer #5 · answered by asdfghjkl; 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to understand first of all that you're never going to "get over" this. I lost my mother when I was 19, so I can tell you that you will cry and hurt a lot for the first while ... you'll think of him every moment of every day. But we can't stay in that state of despair forever and still have a life that honours the person we lost. In small ways, you'll begin to find your own way to deal with the hole in your heart.
You're very sweet to be there for your mother. Ask her to help you find a way to pay tribute to your dad at your wedding ... not to be morbid, but to honour him and feel his presence there with you on that important day.
Then ... live your life the way you believe would have made him proud of you. Think of him, talk about him, remember him. He'll always be part of your life, even though his physical presence is gone.
All the best to you and your family.
2006-08-25 08:32:00 · answer #6 · answered by Myrna B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh you are still a little girl of your Dad very first i am not at all ready to believe you have lost your Dad. for the good reason that no one in this world ever stays for ever each and every one have to leave the stage when ever the director says us to get out. that dose not simply means i will not meet my Dad ever NO. that's where the faith comes in.
Well these are the hard reality witch virtually, each and every one have to face in some point of time. do not loose your heart, listen to what your eternal father is saying to you, the real father, this father was send by the god father, to act as an father but the real father witch always is beside you, to guide you ,what dose he says. I think God says girl do not get messed up with this tiny life time you are as eternal like god and like your Dad, he is very much their waiting for you to complete your role.
we all the actors play our different roles as we decide before taking the birth we separate and meet again and again their is nothing to cry in this small truth. your dad has really done enough to bring you to an stage you able to live an independent life on the country you should be thankful to Almighty god father for giving such an loving and caring Dad. do not associate your self with limited single life. your dad is very much their looking and guiding you every moment i guarantee you.
2006-08-25 08:39:37 · answer #7 · answered by dubai chaser 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take comfort in knowing that HE didn't see YOU pass - A father's grief over losing his little girl would be even more devastating than what you are feeling. He left knowing that you were well on your way... And find peace in knowing that he has returned to the collective consciousness - the thing of which we are all a part, as one grain of sand in the universe, and a place to which we'll all return. Take comfort in knowing that in the distant future, you and he will laugh together about that tiny speck of time in all of eternity that you both existed in the form we are all experiencing right now. It isn't the end - he is far ahead of us in truly knowing, feeling and understanding what it is to be immortal...
2006-08-25 09:10:14 · answer #8 · answered by DashRockwood 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I lost my dad when I was 20 and it was the hardest thing I've ever been through. I had the same thoughts as you - he never saw me get married, met my kids, etc. One thing I did on the day of my wedding was had a special flower arrangement made up and I went out to the cemetery with my new husband and left them on his grave. It sounds morbid, but that was my way of him being there. I'm 41 now and lost my mom 3 years ago but I still think of both of them daily. He was my life. You will never get over it, but it does become easier. God Bless You.
2006-08-25 08:26:57 · answer #9 · answered by icddppl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry for your loss. My mom died after a battle with cancer...like you and your dad, we were very close. The best healer is time. Be there for your mom, but also allow people to help you...turn to friends for support, seek grief counseling if necessary. Give yourself time to heal. Then one day you will realize that your dad loved you so much that he would want you to have a happy, productive life rather than grieving for him. Each day will get a little better, and you will recover. There will come a time when thoughts of him will not make you cry...instead, fond memories of him will make you smile. I promise you...time will ease your pain. Godspeed
2006-08-25 08:30:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋