I have a best friend that I have known since I can remember...She has done me wrong so many times lately...only calling when she needs help, always having an excuse to get off the phone when I need to talk to her, taking off of work to go out with other frinds instead of using that day to go to my birthday party which she was supposed to be throwing!...there are too many things to list...this all happened when she finally lost her virginity...she thinks she is a whore and she wants to stop but she does not know how...I am getting fed up with her. I am a guy...no i do not like her in a sexual way, and no I am definately not jealous of her. I am just tired of her treating me this way what do you think happened? Things just changed soo fast...I have not been answering her phone calls for the past few days and she leaves messages asking why I am mad at her...today is her birthday and I think I am just gonna blow off her party...I know I should be there for her beacuse that is what a good..
2006-08-25 06:30:56 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
friend would do...but if she couldnt make time to be there for me should I have to make the time to be there for her? Am I wrong for doing this?
2006-08-25 06:31:41 · update #1
yeah i just asked a similar question earlier so u dont have to answer if u already have...
2006-08-25 06:38:01 · update #2
First off, if she thinks that she is a whore but doesn't know how to knock it off, tell her it takes will power. If she wanted to quit and respect herself, she would have done it by now. Pure and simple. Maybe she is only saying this to sorta' make an effort to knock-the-name away... without actually having to stop her actions. Secondly, she lost her virginity and is now ignoring you??? Maybe it is because that's all she is interested in now. Sex and sex alone then she calls you once she has achieved her goal, because she then "has time". I'd say blow off the party, too. The only way she is going to learn is to bluntly show her what she's causing. If she don't know why your mad at her, I'd tell her... but I wouldn't waste too much effort simply because if she was actually THAT worried about it, you 2 would never be in this situation.
2006-08-25 06:40:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't stoop down to her level, if you see yourself as her best friend of course you'll make it to her birthday even if you are mad at her. If she happens to wonder why you came even though you were mad or something similar say because I'm your best friend and of course you had to be there when she blows out her candles. You wouldn't want to break your record of all the years you've seen her blow out her candles in a row now do you? Since she is a girl, she probably just wants to spend more time with her girlfriends and trying to live life to the fullest. You can't blame her much, there are somethings girls want to do that boys would absolutely hate. You should just go to her birthday party and talk to her about how shes been acting towards you. Maybe it is just a simply misunderstanding. I hope you two work out your problems because best friends that have gone through as much as you two are rare to find. Good Luck.
2006-08-25 13:39:00 · answer #2 · answered by Liliac 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe in the cardinal rule treat others how you want to be treated, but that doesn't mean you should lay down and take a beating from your "best-friend". It sounds like you just need to break away and surround yourself with people who will treat you like you deserve to be treated.
As far as the birthday party, I think that choice is up to you. If you think she will treat you poorly, then why go? Your better off going out with other people and having a great time!!
2006-08-25 13:37:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I just answered a question JUST like this one... If you are a good friend... You would go to her party anyways... Your lives might be changing and getting different, all you can do is be there for eachother. Quit ignoring her, that is immature. Talk to her more... Get her to understand that you miss hanging out... and want to more often. That this is NOT a one way friendship and she cant call on you whenever she wants when you cant call on her too. Thats not what a friendship is. But DEF go to the party, you'll regret it later if you dont... and regret is unbearably hard to live with.
2006-08-25 13:36:35 · answer #4 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is what you should do:
-Don't call her, don't email her
-When she calls just say: I am hanging out with (make up a girl name) can we talk later?
-Live as she is at the bottom of your priority list.
I know its hard because she is your friend, but I think you are more of a friend to her than she will ever be to you.
You need to take a stand and be strong. You need to make new friends or just ignore this one. If she really wants to be your friend, she WILL CALL YOU, a good friend does anything to keep a friendship.
A friend should be a friend at ANYTIME. So far you are the friend she runs to only when life goes bad.
2006-08-25 13:38:17 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't let her treat you like a door mat. Next time she calls and wants to know what's wrong, tell her the truth -- that she is not treating you like a friend and that you don't appreciate it.
She may be feeling uncomfortable around you because you remind her of her pre-sex days and the way things used to be (especially if she is telling the truth about not liking sleeping around). Or she may be having feelings for you and not sure how to act about them.
Give her a chance to explain, but be very clear that friendship requires effort from both people involved, and if she's not going to try, its not going to work.
2006-08-25 13:37:35 · answer #6 · answered by tarheel mom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No but realize that she is NOT YOUR BEST FRIEND!!! because friends dont do that to each other, I think she has found the power that all women have over men and she is using it on you, you are getting played. you are her very own clown there for her entertainment only, my advise would be to flip the script on her and see how she licks it.
2006-08-25 13:38:48 · answer #7 · answered by bigmj75 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't blow off her party. Just ignore her from now on and take her of your 'friends' list.
2006-08-25 13:35:33 · answer #8 · answered by can2gone 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
go to her birthday. she may have mistreated you but she is still your friend. explain to her how you feel and see what happens. she will probably feel bad. but dont just ignor her because you are doing the same thing that she does to you.
Good Luck.
2006-08-25 13:39:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that even tho she treats you like junk you should still be there for her. But don't stay to long at her party. if someone treats you bad doesn't mean you have to do it back to them. that wouldn't be a good friend.
2006-08-25 13:37:08 · answer #10 · answered by Female 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋