My nan was recently admitted to hospital with a stroke, and my aunt - who is her next of kin, stopped the hospital from talking to the rest of her family - if we phoned they couldnt tell us anything, if we visited we were not allowed in unless she was informed first.
She also takes money off my nan, for petrol to take her shopping - although shes going there anyway. She is given pocket money every week - my nan that is - who is 72 and quite capable of dealing with her money herself.
No-one will say anything to her - in fear of rocking the boat and annoying her - as she will prevent other family members from talking to each other.
What shall I do?
2006-08-25 01:51:47 · 14 answers · asked by schmushe 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
She is a control freak. Control freaks are not kind people. When your nan gets out of the hospital, talk to her about it. She may be afraid of offending your aunt. Some times when people get older they are worried that they will have no one to help if they can't take care of themselves. Let your nan know that you and the rest of the family WILL help her. She does not need to count on your aunt only. Have a family meeting. Don't let your aunt bully everyone & don't let her bully your nan.
I hate control freaks. They cause more trouble in families than anything else.
2006-08-25 02:06:45 · answer #1 · answered by Patti C 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tell her. Get it out in the open. Open up your mouth and do what all women do best, let it rip. Tell your aunt in front of an audience, preferably family members. Hopefully some of them will come to your aid as well. You and your family members can seek to get guardianship over you Nan. You have to show proof why it would best. The best would be the fact that your nan can spend her money, won't have a theft around, and the rest of the family can be informed about her health. You should try and get everyone together and appoint someone who would be the best in being her guardian. Go for it.
2006-08-25 09:12:07 · answer #2 · answered by trustnoone_ever 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have no choice but to "ROCK THE BOAT!" The only way this is going to stop is if someone (you) puts their foot down & say something to your Aunt! Who cares if she gets "annoyed" Too bad! What she is doing is wrong & it sounds like she is taking advantage of your nan! If your Aunt gets annoyed or mad! She'll get over it! You gotta stick up for your nan! You need to somehow tell your nan about all this! Even if you have to write a note/letter to her & slip it to her when you do get to see her & tell her to keep the note from your Aunt! Your aunt is definatly a control freak & has issues! Maybe she should be in the mental ward of the hospital!
God Bless & hope things get better!
I will be praying for you!
2006-08-25 09:01:02 · answer #3 · answered by Joeysol'lady 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know what, rock the boat. She cant stop others from talking to each other, and if you already know shes like this, theyll expect it. Do whats best for Nan. Seems to me like she keeps Nan away for cash, not for love, but yet I dont know her, only what youve said. There comes a time when you have to stand up and say what you believe to stop others from having an advantage. Then talk to Nan herself, and tell her your feelings, and that you care for her. But go ahead, rock the boat! Nan might even respect you more for it, maybe this woman is blocking communication Nan wants to have? Youll only know if you stand up. Sometimes someone needs to. Cant wait for everyone else.
2006-08-25 09:01:53 · answer #4 · answered by lasttruediva 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your Aunt is not your Nans Power of Attorney she does not have the right to do these things to your family talk to a lawyer. If she does have POA you all are screwed there is nothing you can do. God forbid if something does happen to your Nan it sounds to me your Aunt will try to take everything unless your Nan has a will. Good luck and GOD BLESS.
2006-08-25 09:03:02 · answer #5 · answered by Carol W 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Go and visit your nan, if she's looking alert enough to take in what you need to say, tell her exactly how you and your family feel and ask her how she feels about it and what she would like to do. You never know, she might be happy as she is. On the other hand if you take it into your own hands to sort this out without consulting your nan then you'll be just as bad as your aunty
2006-08-25 09:00:32 · answer #6 · answered by anna-lee 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
she sounds like a witch, perhaps contacting a laywer to get someone else the power of attorney over your nans legal affairs...it may sound harsh, but if your aunt is taking advantage of the situation, then someone else should file to get that. They would then have control of her money, medical care, and would be the person that the MD talks to when needed...
2006-08-25 08:55:52 · answer #7 · answered by ndussere 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Get an attorney and see what your options are to getting power of attorney over your nan. Then get the family together and bann her from your nan. Sounds like she's just after your nan's inheritance. Seek legal advice!!!!!
2006-08-25 08:58:00 · answer #8 · answered by really???? 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If she is on Medicare you might ask them to step in and help. Call the DR. and insit on him letting you know.Let him know what is going on! O ther wise tell her you are going to report her to a agency for taking your nan's money.
2006-08-25 09:17:15 · answer #9 · answered by indiana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've read all of the previous answers and they are great so I won't repeat them but I will say that if I wanted to visit a loved one in the hospital NO ONE would be able to stop me!
2006-08-25 10:34:22 · answer #10 · answered by Mollywobbles 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋