what are the characteristcs of an abusive person?

Question

how does one know if a person has the tendency to abuse (physically, mentally, emotionally, verbally)? is there a way of recognizing a potentially abusive person?

Answer 1

Domestic violence experts say that the following 15 clues are signs that a person could be abusive. If a potential partner shows ANY of these warning signs, you should be wary of him/her:

(1) PUSHES FOR QUICK INVOLVEMENT: Comes on strong, claiming, "I've never felt loved like this by anyone." An abuser pressures the new partner for an exclusive commitment almost immediately.

(2) JEALOUS: Excessively possessive; calls constantly or visits unexpectedly; prevents you from going to work because "you might meet someone"; checks the mileage on your car.

(3) CONTROLLING: Interrogates you intensely (especially if you're late) about whom you talked to and where you were; keeps all the money; insists you ask permission to go anywhere or do anything.

(4) UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS: Expects you to be the perfect mate and meet his or her every need.

(5) ISOLATION: Tries to cut you off from family and friends; accuses people who are your supporters of "causing trouble." The abuser may deprive you of a phone or car, or try to prevent you from holding a job.

(6) BLAMES OTHERS FOR PROBLEMS OR MISTAKES: It's always someone else's fault if something goes wrong.

(7) MAKES OTHERS RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS OR HER FEELINGS: The abuser says, "You make me angry," instead of "I am angry," or says, "You're hurting me by not doing what I tell you."

(8) HYPERSENSITIVITY: Is easily insulted, claiming hurt feelings when he or she is really mad. Rants about the injustice of things that are just a part of life.

(9) CRUELTY TO ANIMALS OR CHILDREN: Kills or punishes animals brutally. Also may expect children to do things that are far beyond their ability (whips a 3-year-old for wetting a diaper) or may tease them until they cry. Sixty-five percent of abusers who beat their partner will also abuse children.

(10) "PLAYFUL" USE OF FORCE DURING SEX: Enjoys throwing you down or holding you down against your will during sex; finds the idea of rape exciting.

(11) VERBAL ABUSE: Constantly criticizes or says blatantly cruel things; degrades, curses, calls you ugly names. This may also involve sleep deprivation, waking you with relentless verbal abuse.

(12) RIGID GENDER ROLES: Expects you to serve, obey, remain at home.

(13) SUDDEN MOOD SWINGS: Switches from sweet to violent in minutes.

(14) PAST BATTERING: Admits to hitting a mate in the past, but says the person "made" him (or her) do it.

(15) THREATS OF VIOLENCE: Says things like, "I'll break your neck," or "I'll kill you," and then dismisses them with, "Everybody talks that way," or, "I didn't really mean it."

Answer 2

if you are talking about an abusive man the abuse generally runs in cycle. He will usually begin by being verbally and emotionally abusive, keeping you torn down mentally. If he is able to vent his frustrations like this and hasn't hit yet then that may be enough to satisfy whatever it is he needs. Usually control.
Physically abusive man will start out by fighting verbally(usually) then it will build into a physical confrontation. Once they have abused physically many of them will feel sorry for what they have done and will be extra loving, kind, and attentive. They apologize and say they will never do it again. That will last for several weeks then he will begin the whole cycle as described above again. Sometimes counseling helps and some times it doesn't. This is the general cycle of an abuser, it can be a man/woman, or a parent/child situation.
I don't know who you are asking this about or if it is just a general interest to you. If it is someone you know they need help.

Answer 3

puting you down a lot, i would say would be one of many signs. Pretending to hit you in an argument (raising the hand) because he will follow through one day. I dont know if that was helpful. I have never been in that situation before but god help the person who is, i do feel sorry for them, no lady should be treated like that or shouldn't be in a relationship where physical or mental abuse is concern. Its not worth it. I just hope that you aren't in one girl.

Answer 4

unfortunately i am gng through this now.....an abusive person is anyone that feels the need to put their hands on you for any reason big or small. an abusive person is someone who does nothing but be a bully and put you down all of the time and just is negative and makes fun of you all of the time. they have sex with u in a rough way or take it when they want it. i dont know anything else but this is my life now and i am getting him out of it. i suggest u do the same if it u as well. good luck

Answer 5

My father was, he went out to strip clubs countless times, was an alcoholic and would hit my mother. A man should never raise his hand to a woman, even if he is not intending to touch her. The threat involved should say something right there. Men emotionally, and mentally hurt women to tie them down,control them. No one should ever let that happen. It can take longer then you know to mend the scars you receive. I can promise you that.

Answer 6

The way that they treat the animals is a dead give away. Plus listen for speech patterns . Like if he/she is always talking about man i hate this person or that person and is always saying things like man i sure would like to kick their ***. That is a dead give away of how they handle anger and of the potential damage that they could do to you or others if you make them mad. Speech patterns can tell you a lot about people. Say they are always saying bad things about others then they themselves could do the same to you if you make them angry. I hope this helped you and please if you are in a abusive relationship seek out help to have it stopped. Peace.

Answer 7

Unfortunately, there is no easy way to tell this. That's why there are so many predators out there because they are usually someone who the victim is close to. Look at the BTK killer. He was a teacher or preacher in his town for years and no one knew what he was doing. A lot of people will pretend to be what you want them to be until they get you where they want you. Then their true colors come out.

Answer 8

There are categories of abusive personalities. But you can identify them in ordinary dealings.

A person with a tendency to abuse psychologically is always pointing out your weaknesses, telling you that you are not worthy, dull, ignorant, ugly, negativistic in every opinion you share. he/she can demean you in front of others by acting out indifferently to every good points you share.

An abusive person is easily angered....with low self-esteem...had many failures in life..or a product of an abusive family.

Answer 9

Domination, verbal assaults, emotional blackmail, unpredictable responses, constant criticism, character assassination, gaslighting, constant chaos, sexual harassment.

They also have the habit of isolating their victims from others so that the abused does not have any supports and so that they can create a dependent relationship.

Answer 10

you can tell the character of the person by the face xpression and not by face structure. the face may be dark, pimpled, cratered etc etc but their eyes dont lie .so watch their eyes. if the eyes are disturbing to your then his or her feeling for you is very hostile. and dont go with people whose always pleases you or very friendly (expects your husband/wife) they may be plotting something big right under your nose. dont fall for anyone sweet talk( some of the sweetest candys are jaw breakers), always question their motives.dont try this on your true love or husband/wife. these are from my experience.