How many Amish does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, one to hold the bulb and the other to tell him it's against the will of God.
How many atheists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. They're never in the dark.
How many atheists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. Atheists question whether it's really light anyway.
How many atheists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. Atheists never "see the light" anyway do they?
How many Branch Davidians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. They provide their own illumination.
How many Branch Davidians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Nine. One to do it and the other eight to find a leg for him to stand on.
How many Catholic Bishops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. Catholic Bishops don't change anything ....
How many Hari Krishnas does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Ten, one to do it and the rest to dance around, play the tambourine, chant, and sing lots of songs using only the words "Hari Krishna."
How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to change a lightbulb?
Don't know - I didn't let them in to find out.
How many missionaries does it take to change a lightbulb?
101. One to change it and 100 to convince everyone else to change lightbulbs too.
How many Mormons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Six. One to screw it in and the other five to serve refreshments.
How many Muslims does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. If the lightbulb has died, it is the will of Allah, and it would be blasphemy to attempt to change it.
How many Quakers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Ten to sit around in a circle until one feels the inner light.
How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to screw it in, and another to repent.
How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to do it and a priest to hear him confess and give the old bulb last rites.
How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't. It's been like that for 2000 years and there's no precedent for lightbulb changing.
How many Taoists does it take to change a lightbulb?
You cannot change a lightbulb. By its nature it will go out again.
How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A tree in a golden forest.
How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. The Universe spins the bulb, and the Zen master stays out of the way.
How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None. Zen masters carry their own light.
How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One to change and one not to change is fake Zen. The true Zen answer is Four. One to change the bulb.
How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two: one to change the bulb and one not to change it.
2006-08-24 08:59:43 · 9 answers · asked by darkangel1111 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
ive been way to serious this morning, here are some funny lightbulb jokes, enjoy
2006-08-24 09:00:32 · update #1
Jehovah's Witnesses have the true religion.
Learn more:
http://watchtower.org/library/jt/index.htm
2006-08-28 06:10:08 · answer #1 · answered by achtung_heiss 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
pretty funny for the most part.
I got one.
A business man was walking to work one day and saw little Billy selling some puppies. As he walks by he notices that the box says "Atheist puppies". The business laughs and continues on his way. About a week later he walks by the box and sees it has been renamed "Jehovah's Witness Puppies". So he asked little Billy why the name changed. Billy looks at him and says their older now. "What does that have to do with anything"?
Billy replied their eyes are open now.
I think the one about Jehovah's Witnesses was pretty ok. I know there are allot of times people decide to not open the door when I come. It is nice because it is funny but does not belittle my faith.
2006-08-24 19:49:41 · answer #2 · answered by Ish Var Lan Salinger 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb.
2. The real question is how they got in there in the first place.
2006-08-24 16:06:56 · answer #3 · answered by VetteLeo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I stopped reading after the catholic Bishop. Way to many. I would have to say that I like the Atheist ones though.
2006-08-28 15:47:16 · answer #4 · answered by butterfly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How many idiots does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Duh, what's a light bulb.
2006-08-24 16:13:52 · answer #5 · answered by Nails 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There all dumb, the light bulb jokes are way over done.
2006-08-24 16:13:21 · answer #6 · answered by LADY ICE 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'll be happy if the thing just gets changed! LOL.
2006-08-24 21:47:00 · answer #7 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
:-):-);-)
~p~
2006-08-24 16:06:50 · answer #8 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
:)
2006-08-24 16:02:59 · answer #9 · answered by IrishEyes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋