I have a 28 month old and a 2 month old, just wondering if it gets easier?

Question

My 28 month old is going through his "terrible twos" and my 2 month old is, well only 2 months old. I'm breastfeeding the baby, my older child deals with it well. The 2 month old is up every 2 hours at night and my 2 year old is waking up once a night to be held, because of a bad dreams?(not sure and doesnt say what woke him). Try to spend time with the 2 year old when the baby is sleeping. The 2 year old doesn't nap anymore but I do put him in his room for quiet time. Just trying to figure out from other parents when to put in time to do housework, pay bills, take a shower, etc. By the end of the day I'm too exhausted to do things when the boys are sleeping. I don't have anyone to help me or give me a break. Grandparents all work full time and so does my husband. Plus I go back to work in a couple of weeks (just 2 nights a week for 6 hrs each) Just looking for ways other moms/dads handle it.

Answer 1

I had my 2 boys at the same ages....it was tough. They are 4 and 6 now and it's definately a bit easier. The thing is once they get older, the fighting starts. My 2 year old also stopped napping as soon as baby came along, so I did not get much rest. What I did, was insist that my husband take 2 nights a week of baby duty, I understand that they work too, but 2 nights won't kill him, if you can do it everynight, he can surely handle 2. Start pumping breast milk now, and freeze it for when hubby gets up to tend to baby. You will find that even with just 2 nights of decent sleep, you will feel much better, physically and emotionally. The house is bound to be a disaster, and it's acceptable. You have 2 babies, no time for full cleanings, just do what you can...again if hubby doesn't like it, hand him the mop and broom and tell him to have a go at it....Now, I did use the TV, to entertain my 2 yr old, while I was doing some household chores, there are plenty of non offensive, healthy shows on for that age, PBS is great, and also Noggin if you get that. The shows are very educational and fun for them, I'm not saying stick him in front of the TV for hours, but certainly 30 minutes while you do other things is not unhealthy....good luck, just keep in mind it will get easier, in about a year, things will settle down, you can do it, and asking for help is not a sign of an unfit mom, it's just needed

Answer 2

Parenting, the toughest job you'll ever love, eh? It's hard, but you'll get through it. A physician, way back in the 16th century wrote on the importance of a mother finding time to be alone each day, even if it meant going into a closet and closing the door behind her.

If it doesn't matter to your hubby now to give you a bit of a break, is he going to expect you to carry that load and work, too? We've a housefull of kids here, but mine still takes time to keep the small ones' attention for at least an hour in the evening. Was really helpful, especially as a couple were 'Irish Twins' and born less than a year apart. Hand him the baby, leave him with the toddy and go take a nice long shower. He works hard, yes and you appreciate it, but he's also their father.

Answer 3

Give it about 18 years. It should get better after that. I have a 27 month old and an almost 9 month old. I'm in the same boat as you. No one around to help me with anything. Everyone works. I guess I'm lucky though, both of my kids are great. The older one "helps" with the housework - I give her a Swiffer cloth and she cleans the windows that she can reach - she's quite proud of herself when she does a good job - lol. When I have to vacuum, I just plop them into the playpen and go to it. They're quite content in there together - until I'm done - then it's "out? out? out?" arms stretched into the air. Showering, laundry, kitchen work, it's all the same thing - the playpen is a wonderful invention. Nap time is also a great time to get things done. My two year old still naps in the afternoon and I've trained the baby to nap at the same time - so it's a couple of hours of blissful time to myself. Like now. Good luck, don't forget that I was there at one point (six short months ago) and I'm still here to tell you about it. Good luck.

Answer 4

if you can possibly swing it, hire a housekeeper for every other week. I had three kids and never did this but i hear it helps.
I had my husband put the older kid in a back carrier and help
with the housework on the weekends. He was really good about helping with he kids but always got them wound up at bedtime. I had no grandparents around either, lived too far away. My kids were 6 to 7 years apart though. Maybe that made it easier? I don't know. But don't fret about the housework, just give it a lick and a promise so to speak. They do grow up so fast. You never get those times back. I was in Walmart yesterdya and heard this mother and grandmother telling the kids to shut up and how sick they were of them. How awful. What a sad mistake that is. enjoy those babies now.

Answer 5

I know how you feel, I have a 5 , 3 and 18 month old. They are exhausting. Honey, I hate to say this but it gets worse. Once the 2 month old starts walking, you will never get any peace. All you need to remember is that you love them so enjoy the little things. Even if you only get a little at a time, what you do for your kids now will impact them for the rest of their lives. You are the most important thing to your children.

Answer 6

It gets easier..LOL although some days i wonder..lol I work full time as well and I have kids that are almost the same exact age apart as your. I have a three year old and a five year old. And let me tell you they both still take naps. Mommy needs time to refresh and renew...plus it keeps them from falling asleep at dinner. So there is nothing wrong with your two year old taking naps still. The "bad dreams" your two year old is having may just be his way to get mom all to himself. I would suggest going into the room, saying to him its all right, it was just a dream then scooting your butt back to bed.
Also i would suggest taking one day a week...and getting a sitter. maybe even one day ever two weeks just as long as you get a break. Go get your nails done and recharge. A study has shown that full-time moms actually perform the work of Three full time people. Don't feel bad that you need time for yourself. its ok.

Answer 7

Well, I"m going to be in the same boat, only my son will be 21 months when my next baby is born (due January 24). Right now I am having my son help me with the house work. He throws away his own diapers, and helps me unload the dishwasher. He's becoming very helpful to me. His daddy and I work opposite shifts, so we don't see each other until the weekends. I also work full time (as of right now) and I am undecided whether or not I will return to work after this baby or not. I am very worried about being stuck in the same situation as you. Both sets of grandparents either work or live more than 30 minutes away. I'm glad I stumbed across your question...some people in this group have very good advice on how to deal! Good luck to you, and thanks to all of those who've given some really good answers!

Answer 8

We have a 28 month old and a 5 month old. Its still pretty exciting at our house, but I believe it does get easier. The little one is sleeping through the night. Our 2 year old has settled in on her 8pm bedtime. This gives us some downtime at night. It will get easier. Hang in there.

Answer 9

It will get easier! Some people tell you it wont, but it will. Have ur little 2 yr old help with simple things, like throwing away diapers, make him excited to be a big brother so he wont feel left out. When they get older and out of diapers things get easier..but then u have to deal with the attitudes lol, but atleast you dont have to clean their butts!

Answer 10

It gets easier. They grow up and begin to do things for themselves, which makes it easier on you. They become more independent and do not need you as much. I know it sounds kinda depressing 'cause u want be needed as much, but it does give u more time for you. Hang in there.