My younger sister just asked me to do an essay for her. She does this a lot and I always help her but today I'm just not in the mood and I've had enough. She says she has a test comimg up and needs time to study. That's why she can't do this one by herself. Although I'm free to do it I said no I just can't do it any more. Now I feel bad. Am I selfish for not helping her?
2006-08-24 02:09:40 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
No. She need to do her school work. You had to do your didn't you?? She needs to work for her grade not you...
2006-08-24 02:11:54 · answer #1 · answered by angel2005_2001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to admit that you are NOT a bad sister for not doing an essay for her. Her essay is her own homework. It is her responsibility to do her own homework no matter how many tests she have or how much time she needs to study. You said that you are not in a mood to do the essay for her. I tell you that even if you are in a mood, you shouldn't help her do her work. Do you always do her homework for her? If you do, then you are wrong? It is not about being a good or bad sister. It is all about understanding what you should and shouldn't do for her. In this case, I feel that the problem is you should understand what you should and shouldn't do for her. You are not selfish. You are doing what you should do. You should say to yourself that you should never do homework for anyone, as to say that no one should do homework for you.
2006-08-24 02:32:59 · answer #2 · answered by youngwoman 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not helping her - you are doing it for her. she will never learn how to take care of herself if you keep doing this for her. When you both are grown and out of school who is going to support your sister? A man will not be attracted to a woman that has to have her sister do her responsibilities. Employers can't hire the 2 of you for one job either.
How does she do on tests? Who will take her college entrance and SAT's for her if she can't do it herself?
Do you understand the downward spiral this is becoming?
I understand your concern. Do the project WITH her. Not for her. Maybe a parent also needs to be helping. Sounds like you are taking on way too much as a sibling.
I am the eldest of 3 and the 2 younger tried this but never got away with it. My daughter would also try. I told her I will give you the answers, but no guarantees that they are correct. Probably all wrong because I am such a Dummie. Cause only stupid parents do their child's work. She got the message and pulled excellent grades because I helped when needed and saw that she did her own work. if not then there were consequences. she thanks me today.
Take care of your self more. Your sister will still love you!
2006-08-24 02:41:12 · answer #3 · answered by MotherNature 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She never going to learn to stand on her own two feet if you help her out, especially with her school work. She'll never understand the subject if she hasn't involved herself in her own essays. I'm suprised the teacher hasn't cotton. She could be in a lot of trouble if she gets other people to do her work.
Your not a bad sister. If anyones being selfish i think your sister is a little.
2006-08-24 02:17:01 · answer #4 · answered by trackie1 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO you are not a bad sister. You are actually helping her by saying no to her. She needs to learn to stand on her own two feet. What happens if you continue to do things for her? When you are adults she would expect you to help her with money, a place to stay, help her with her job, etc. It will get stressful and tiring and you could end up resenting your sister. It's good to want to help, but people have to help themselves and try their best BEFORE they ask for help.
She needs to do her own work. If she doesn't have time to study, she needs to make adjustments in her own schedule. Instead of watching TV or hanging out with friends or talking on the phone, she should be studying. And she shouldn't wait to the last minute.
You are not being selfish by any-means. Sit down and talk to her and explain that you cannot do her work for her. You are working on your own homework and you have your own things to do. But let her know you are willing to help her but not do the work for her.
2006-08-24 02:42:13 · answer #5 · answered by Erica, AKA Stretch 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No your are not a bad sister for telling her no. She needs to learn how to do it on her own. tell her that when she gets it done that you will look over it and then help her out with it. That way she has to do it by her self. Tell her to do the essay first then study for the test and then maybe you can quiz her on the test and look over the essay.
good luck
2006-08-24 02:15:01 · answer #6 · answered by baby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you aren't a bad sister. Stop feeling guilty about it.
Your sister is cheating and you're helping her do it when you do her work for her. She isn't learning anything at all when you do it all.
Let her struggle through this herself so that she can learn lessons. You'll actually be doing her a favor.'
2006-08-24 02:16:06 · answer #7 · answered by Bluealt 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no you are not a bad sister if anything you are a good sister for stopping.You are helping her.If you continue doing her school work she will only skate through school because of you.And she will not actually learn anything.She needs to start doing her own work.And start doing that first before any thing else teach her time management.You had to learn this.You have to do your own work she cant help you because shes younger.Stick to your ground if she needs help help her show her how to do it but dont do it for her.Good luck sweetie.
2006-08-24 02:38:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No...and you shouoldn't feel bad either. If she doesn't learn, then what will happen to her later on in life. What about when your gone...and then there is nobody to do her work for her...then she will fail. Give her tips and answer questions for her...but don't do the work....your really not helping her at all...your just enabling her to fall short.
2006-08-24 02:17:33 · answer #9 · answered by lisa46151 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are feeling bad because you always did it for her and now you said no. Explain to her that you love her and you decided you are not helping her by doing her work and that you won't be doing it any more. She should understand and if not she will get over it...
2006-08-24 02:56:52 · answer #10 · answered by kitkat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no. she has completely become dependent on u to do her work and by u continuing to do her work ur teaching her to be able to put her work off on others when she goes to college and gets a job. u r a good sister to have done it once for her, two and three more times after that is ridicolous and shes using u. so put that foot down and keep it down!
2006-08-24 02:18:39 · answer #11 · answered by foxzie006 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋