all my life i told myself i wasnt scared and ended up in a lot of fights just cause of people think i wouldnt?

Question

i am almost 28 with 3 kids do you think there is a problem with me.

Answer 1

if you are scared that is not the end of the world at least you would be yourself.you dont have to prove anything to anyone, you dont need approval, if someone wants you to fight then they dont respect you as a person. you are worth more to yourself, family and children alive and free, free being not in prison. people might have a grudge against you and take it out on your children and you would not forgive yourself, seek councelling and you would be able to be who you really are maybe you would overcome everything.

Answer 2

The normal and socially acceptable thing is for people not to fight physically if that's what you've been doing. The issue of whether or not you're scared shouldn't even be an issue because the issue of having a fight looming isn't what people generally have to deal with.

If you've been telling yourself you aren't afraid to fight then what you've been thinking is that you're ready to fight if you need to. That's the only reason you tell yourself you're not afraid to fight.
You have to realize that it generally isn't what people do, especially if you have children and want them to see a good example of how to handle arguments/differences with people.

I do think you have some kind of thing going on, and I think you either have to just decide that fighting isn't an option or else see if you can get some counselor to talk with and find out why it is you see fighting as an option sometimes.

People should be able to disagree, maybe have a polite arguments, even - in the case of some business matters - taking it to court. Most people are able to have day-to-day disagreements or even little "issues" at places like the supermarket without having it turn into a fight.

Its nice that you've put your queston on here. I'll bet many people will agree with me that fighting isn't something that people should be doing, especially when there are children who need to see examples of how to behave.

Maybe there was a time in your life when it was important that you not be scared and that you be ready to fight someone. Unless you're living in prison now or unless you're spending time somewhere where people just aren't civilized, it isn't important whether you're not scared now. Somewhere along the way it seems like you got to believe that not being scared was important and maybe showing that you weren't scared was even more important. It shouldn't be an issue at all. Just my opinion, but I'm not alone.

Answer 3

Sounds like you are afraid of being scared. Only a fool is never scared. Accepting fear as a part of life will help you overcome this problem and allow you to mature into a good parent.

Best wishes and good luck.