I and my girlfriend have been dating for some time now. We often talk about the future and what we both want out of it. She wants children and I certainly want a son most of all. But I am afraid that my son will inherit my A.D.H.D. that I grew up with for many years. I don't want my son to have the childhood that I had.
2006-08-23 17:12:04 · 10 answers · asked by jbrbbt 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
All people are their own people. You can try to teach him how to live by Action, but you cannot tell your child how to live and expect him to listen to it, and have a fufilled life through it. If he learns it through your action, it will make sense to his subconscious as "how people live" but telling them something goes into his brain as "what people say" and doesn't go anywhere near the "how people live" category of his brain. I'd let him be his own person and do what makes them happy to fufill their own lives.
2006-08-23 17:18:41 · answer #1 · answered by Answerer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My 5 year old son was just diagnosed with ADHD. I was told if you have it , your kids are 50% likely to have it. Neither my husband nor I have it. My dad hasn't been diagnosed with it but I believe it probably runs in his family and I would say he has it. My brother and I are ADHD free though. So if you really want kids, just go for it. There is no way of knowing what will happen.If your child does end up having it, I agree that things are probably better for those kids today. You will be at an advantage if your kid does have it. You know what it is like and will be able to recognize it. Through your experiences, you should be able to help your child cope. I suggest if you haven't already that you discuss your fears with your girlfriend. Maybe you are afraid if she can handle it. My son is a handful and it is very tough work.I love him greatly though and I wouldn't trade him for anything. Let her know your fears for the child and your fears of how you will deal with it. If she understands and is willing to take the chance , maybe the decision will be easier for you to both make. Good luck.
2006-08-24 01:58:44 · answer #2 · answered by iceemama 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't let that stop you. The childhood you had will not be your child's. If you are aware that there may be something different you can be prepared and ready to help . When I was growing up no one had ever heard of ADD or ADHD. I was 29 years old when I found out that I wasn't a BAD person.l I have 2children now and they are both affected. Not a problem. I can relate and give them the help and guidance they need. And you never know it can skip your child or children.
2006-08-24 00:17:06 · answer #3 · answered by blondie_3935 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, there's a good chance your children will also have ADHD, it is genetic. But there is so much more awareness in schools, and among teachers of the problem this disorder causes students, in both their academic and social lives. Your child probably will have a totally different childhood, just like yours was different from your parents. BTW, I'll bet one of your parents has ADHD as well, it just was never diagnosed, and if not one of your parents, an aunt or uncle then.
2006-08-24 01:35:21 · answer #4 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is genetic but that is no reason to not have kids. There is a lot more help now with ADHD then there was when you were a kid. there are different levels of it and even if he does get it it may not be as bad as yours and you are in the great position of knowing what it is like and be able to help your son(or daughter, it is possible for you to both have a girl and her to have it) through it
2006-08-24 06:35:49 · answer #5 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your child could have it and could not..because of your struggles you will understand your child as well and be able to help them with their problems say they get it.
As for the comment about wanting a son..i understand this..because you want your name carried on and it is the way for the man to have the name..
But let me tell you this, my grandfather didnt have his name carried on,and he depended on his son carrying it on, but my uncle didnt honor the name, and he also had a girl. All my life i had been told the male has this and that to do..and the male mattters but now i proved that it can be either and they are just as important
i loved my grandpa so much when i had a son, i gave my son his last name..so not only can males carry it on but females can to..my son is proud to have his name - you see i to chose a male-
2006-08-24 00:22:17 · answer #6 · answered by away right now 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not know how young your lady is but if she is less then 30 years old, then later having babies will become an *issue* to say the least. Solomon wrote that a barren womb always seeks fulfillment, this is a paraphrase.
2006-08-26 17:37:41 · answer #7 · answered by rc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask a doctor adhd may or may not be genetic.
2006-08-24 00:14:26 · answer #8 · answered by paganrosemama 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
see a doctor about that or u can adopt
2006-08-24 00:13:37 · answer #9 · answered by BoRiQuA_MaMi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is possible but they have better treatments now!!
2006-08-24 00:15:15 · answer #10 · answered by babynam2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋