My g/f doesn't have a mind of her own. Her family does her thinking. Everytime i time i try to tell her she gets mad. Her older brother controls everyhting and it pisses me off. Whatever he says everyone does including her parents. I really cant talk to her parents because they only speak spanish. They always make me seem bad to my g/f and she thinks like that now. How do i stop this? I really love her.
2006-08-23 16:32:35 · 9 answers · asked by southside_209 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If there is a dominant member of the family, and that family allows that person to dominate, there's really nothing you can do about it, I'm afraid..........If she thinks you are a bad guy because her family says so, than that tells you that she has no inner strength and why be involved with a person like that? C'mon, you're better than that!!!!
2006-08-23 16:36:20 · answer #1 · answered by mizzzzthang 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not knowing how old you are makes this a difficult question to answer. If its her culture to be with her family until she's married, then you may be in for a losing battle if you are not of an age to marry.
If you love this girl and you are an adult, then you need to do what you can to make this family respect you. Make sure you are employed or in school (and still have a part time job). Make sure you treat her with respect and dignity. Be polite and deferring to her parents and to her older brother. You are the outsider, if you want to be part of her life you have to become part of her family.
2006-08-23 16:38:04 · answer #2 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as though there may be some cultural differences here in that in some cultures the man runs the whole show - and especially daughters are not allowed to think for themselves. Not being able to talk to her parents only compounds the problem.
You will need to show them by your actions that you are responsible, respectful and to be trusted.
Why are YOU trying to control her, too?
2006-08-23 16:37:53 · answer #3 · answered by Road Warrior 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you have to find a way to communicate with her more effectively. It seems that she comes from a Spanish speaking background, and may therefore be more comfortable with Spanish, perhaps find someone who can translate your concerns to her in Spanish. You could also try talking to her brother.
The cultural issues may be a big issue here, as they may come from a more traditional family.
2006-08-23 16:39:22 · answer #4 · answered by Aida Z 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesnt sound as tho you stand a chance. If no one will take the initiative, then how do you expect to make any headway. I would suggest you change your life and move on. Unless you wish to have your heart broken, and be miserable as well. I would further expect that it is their family way.
2006-08-23 16:36:52 · answer #5 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mexicans guide thur the old saying, You marry her, you marry her family, so either you get prepared or u dump her.
2006-08-23 16:37:58 · answer #6 · answered by Mr. E 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a new girlfriend. Or, don't do anything, it really doesn't matter. Messing with this kind of situation is not recommended.
2006-08-23 16:38:21 · answer #7 · answered by Mortimer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can't stop it, either get along with it or leave.
Mexican families tend to go by old school values when it comes to family, this can't be kicked.
2006-08-23 16:35:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you gota move on
2006-08-23 16:37:38 · answer #9 · answered by salsa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋