What should I do?

Question

I believe in God. I pray to God. But, there is a problem. I am a 14-year old teenager who has a lot of sexual thoughts. I have read that lust is one of the Deadly Sins. I try not to think sexual things, but I can't keep those thoughts away. I am a good kid who just feels bad about this. I don't think I have commited any other sin, at least not since I found out what the sins were, making possible past sins a forgivable sin, since I had no knowledge I was commiting them. I don't go to church, so I can't make a confession. What should I do?

Answer 1

If Christianity forbids sex until marriage, how did Adam and Even have sex without committing a mortal sin? There were no members of the clergy present to perform the wedding ceremony. Bear in mind that the Bible is a book of writings, letters, stories, etc., compiled by man with the goal to unify the Christian religions with some common beliefs. A group of men gathered and chose which writings, letters, and stories to include, and which ones to exclude. Many people literally believe that God wrote the Bible, and this just is not the case. Any Catholic priest who studied the historical significance of the Bible should tell you this.

Sex, sexual thoughts, and sexual urges are natural. Do not feel shame for having these thoughts. Do not feel shame for acting on these thoughts in some way other than having sex. Self-gratification while fantasizing is one thing that all men and women share in common. A Master’s & Johnson survey conducted over many years with over a million participants, concluded that 98% of all men masturbate and the other 2% lie about it. (Though it sounds like a joke, it is not.)

If you obsess about sex, then it becomes unhealthy both mentally and physically. At your age, your hormone levels vary from huge to almost nothing in the span of a few hours. This is one reason for those embarrassing moments when the teacher calls you to go to the chalkboard, but you decline because Mr. Happy decided to join you for no good reason. The hormones cause you to have these urges and thoughts and no amount of religion can make them go away. If you believe that having sex makes them go away, you would be incorrect. Most humans have these urges until we depart this world. My point here is that you do not need to start looking for sexual partners. With the plethora of sexually transmitted diseases, irresponsible sex is quite dangerous. Leading me back to self-gratification as the only sexual release from which you run no risk of disease. A side effect for abstaining from that is wet sheets in the morning.

If your father is available to you, try talking to him. He knows exactly what you are going through. He has been there too. If you do not have access to your father, talk to an adult male that you trust. Your mother is another option, though most males would find this discussion too uncomfortable to discuss it with their mother. Your doctor is another source of information and can reassure you that what you feel is natural.


Good luck!

Will D
Enterprise AL
http://www.notagz.com

Answer 2

You don't have to do anything. Having those kind of thoughts is normal for a teenager your age. And sexual thoughts are not a deadly sin, Its when you take action that it actually becomes a sin. So don't worry, there's nothing wrong with that, Keep your faith in God and stop agonizing over something so normal....

Answer 3

There's a big difference between having lustful thoughts and living a life of lust. Curioisity about sex is normal and healthy - what we do with these thoughts is part of what shapes our lives.

A friend of mine once said on this subject "You can't stop the birds from flying over your head... but you CAN prevent them from building a nest in your hair."

I personally don't believe thoughts are equivalent to sin, and I don't agree with any kind of teaching that punishes someone for their thoughts. So go easy on yourself - be thoughtful in how you treat others because that's far more important in the long haul than random thoughts you'll occasionally have.

Answer 4

I agree with Lady Christmas.Actually, I agree with all the answers so far.
Sexual thoughts are a very natural part of being human.Our Creator created us knowing these thoughts would happen so He totally understands you.Don't be ashamed of them,just don't allow them to control you.Don't be afraid of asking God for any forgiveness you feel you must have.He knows your heart and is in your soul.Talk to Him as if He were a friend.Don't worry.

Answer 5

You actually can go to confession, you don't even have to be a catholic to go. And it is a good place to get advice from a man who is good at conquering this area. He also may never see you again since you don't attend his church so you don't have to be so embarrassed.

But I will mention that this is totally normal for your age. I know that my son has told me it helps to have the absolute minimum exposure to scantily clad women. If you are dating you might want to back off a bit for now while you conquer this area.

Answer 6

If it's something you feel badly about (and you shouldn't, by the way), you don't need to go to confession - just confess to God directly through prayer. God knows we're not perfect, and he knows that people your age become rather focused on sex. He knows because he made you that way. There's nothing shameful about it - it happens to everyone. The only requirement to get into Heaven is to accept Jesus as your savior. Talk to God like he's anyone else - He's just happy you're talking to him! It's ok to question - and it's ok to talk to God yourself. Please feel free to email me if you have any questions you think I may be able to help with. You'll get many different opinions on Yahoo Answers, and I'm not saying mine it correct, but I'm always willing to listen and share my opinion if you want it. God bless!

Answer 7

Testosterone can't be denied at your age.
I recommend that you masturbate while thinking about having a warm and caring relationship with a girl your age after you are married. You might imagine she is sexy and what you migh do after you are married.
When it comes to acting on your fantasies be very careful to avoid the possibility of getting deadly diseases and keep in mind that you must finish your schooling, have a good job and be able to support a child before you create one.
Good luck, have fun, be safe,

Answer 8

It was believed back when people wrote tht bible tht people had a limited count of sperm. That really isnt relevant today so feel free to think and wack-off w/e u want. If that god says you can't do tht then why not find another one?

P.s. I just turned 15..I found the way of the FSM. Very enlightening. Also I get a stripper in heaven and a beer volcano :D!

http://www.venganza.org/

Answer 9

It's okay to have sexual thoughts. It's obsessing over them that makes them bad. It's focusing them on a married woman that is bad. We are programmed to think about reproducing. It's normal, dude.

Answer 10

To Era is Human
No sex is not a Deadly Sin
But is mentioned in the Bible to flee from until your married
Give your self a break