He hit me...out of anger..What do i do?

Question

My boyfriend ( this is the same one who i've been having trouble with lately, the way he talks to me, and the way he "uses" me as a sex object ) hit me a few minutes ago. He came home so upset about work and how everything he does is wrong, he started yelling at me, and i told him to calm down and he called me a ***** and slapped me. He never does that! its so out of character for him. I love him, but if he's venting and taking it out me, maybe i should reconsider our relationship? he apologized after i started crying and told me he loved me...what do i do?

by clicking on my avatar you can look at other things i've asked that are about somethings my boyfriend has done.... just to see where im coming from

yes, tracysocool...your right..

Answer 1

to tell u the truth if this same thing happened to me and it was my boyfriend i wouldn't leave him. it sounds like he just made a mistake. if i were u i'd give him a another chance.....depending on how much u trust him and love him. if u truly believe he isn't going to do it again and that it wasn't something like him to do. i would never stay quiet about it though. after he calmed down i would look him straight in the eye and say "if u ever touch me like that again i NEVER want to see ur face again you got it?!?!?.” If he doesn’t change then he never will……and just because im a little crazy…if a guy slaped me i would prolly swing a punch....i don't advise you to do that though.

Answer 2

You have to call a battered women's helpline immediately, if nothing else.

HERE IT IS: National Domestic Violence Hotline, 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or www.ndvh.org

If this has happened once, it's very likely to happen again. The men feel bad and apologize right after, and the women forgive them, then they hit them again, and apologize again... see where I'm going with this?

There are organizations that can help, but you need help immediately, because this won't be an isolated incident. This is a dealbreaker.

P.S. Just looked at your other questions. Even though you may not think so, you deserve better than this man. I can't help thinking that you keep posting these questions in the hope that someone will tell you to stay with him, not because you love him (which you may, I don't know), but because you're scared to leave him and want someone to validate your fear.

At some point you'll have to decide which is more important to you -- your safety and self-respect, or the path of least resistance. Right now it seems to be B. When you realize it's A, then you'll be able to make a positive move.

I've found that when I'm afraid to do something major, it's because I can't imagine what will happen, so just sit and think for a moment what would happen if you left this man. Are you afraid he'd hurt you? That you wouldn't have anywhere to live? That everyone would find out you've been abused?

Just think about how you'd deal with all these unpleasant possibilities and go forward expecting them all to happen. (But get some male friends or a cop or something for protection if you feel you need it. Or whatever the battered women's helpline says.)

Good luck.

Answer 3

Chances are , he probably really does love u( or at least thinks he does). Either way, there is no justification for him having to get so physical or verbally abusive with u . keep in mind baby, him loving u ...nor all the love in the world will bring u back from the grave should one day ( out of anger & uncontrollable rage) he strikes u hard e-nuff to cause fatal -consequences...or even permanent-injuries.
And as far as the "sexual-abuse" goes...i am sure to say that if u don't stop him now...then he might just get the crazy notion that secretly u are really enjoying the treatment & disrepect . Show the fella that u desire & demand his respect ( by first respecting ur-self). You can respect yourself by"not allowing urself to be treated that way by any man or person"!
Pick a time to have a heart-to-heart talk with ur b/f; and at that time tell just how u really see & feel about the realation between he & yourself. Tell him of those things he does(or don't do) that makes u feel both, hurt & un-happy . And at the same time do give him his "utimatums" as to what he can expect if you don't see the deisred & expected changes in him soon .
I mean do seriously think about it ; if you , yourself really want him or any man to treat you like a "woman"........then a "real-woman" is precisely what you must be! A" real- woma" would demand her "respect" ( through every aspect of her very being).. not just ask for it !
If the fella( your so-called b/f ) can't handle that... leave his ***!!!!!!!!
No abuse is good abuse; but physical -abuse deffinitely kills ! So life u save might just be ur very own ! Say nooooooooo to abuse!

Wishing u all the luck!

Answer 4

No it not out of character for him, its just the next step in your abusive relationship. I bet you cried with him and told him you loved him to. I swear to with every thing I have, this is only the first time. I'm sure he is just stressed out. I bet he doesn't know whats wrong with him. And you probably deserve better than him. I've heard it all before. What I do know is that now that he has gotten away with it he will do it again. Next time you'll be a slut or ****. And why do you keep pushing him when you know he's at that point. "You know how mad I get Why do you push me" I will also predict that he is cheating on you. If so it will only get worse. I went from being grabbed by the arm and shook to being punched in the back of the head as not to leave any marks. I know you love him and just want him to be nice to you and love you. He probably does love you but he has never learned how to love a women. I'm guessing his parents are divorced or had an abusive relationship. I would tell you to leave but you won't and if you do you'll end up in another bad relationship. You must have always needed more attention from your dad and probably not getting it. Not to say he wasn't a good dad just not affectionate. Please tell me if I'm close. I would love to talk to you more

Answer 5

Hey, girl, you need to get out of that relationship. I know that isn't what you want to hear, but it seems just from this question that he doesn't treat you like a person. Anyone who treats you like some sex object does not respect you as a person. Another thing, since he hit you, and he never has before, you definitely need to get out now while you can. Hitting turns into other things, leading to your murder. I'm not trying to scare you. I am only telling what I think. I've known so many people in abusive relationships that they can't seem to get out of. Just ask yourself, what are the good traits about your boyfriend. Then ask, what are his faults. Be honest, and weigh the good traits and the faults. If the faults seem more than you can handle, you should not waste anymore of you time with this guy. Get out now!

Answer 6

FIRST THING FIRST call the police dept. this is a case of abuse, he may say it won't happen again but I have had a friend who got into a relationship where he controlled her and everything (he wouldn't let her go outside at all or talk to any guys) her abuse was emotional not physical. If you live in the United States most places you could (if you feel threatened by him) call 911 and hang up they will either call back or in most cases send an officer to the address the phone call came from.

Answer 7

and ur still with him???????

that apology he gave you is just his guilt trip........everythime he hits you he will feel guilty at the end and apologize and he maybe sorry for that moment, but if something goes wrong then that demon will come out again.

get out the house, go to someone who will protect you from him and call the police and make sure you press charges against him. seriously he is just getting started and it will get worst than you think. he has no right to take his anger out on you and you have no obligations to him. if you stay you may end up in the hospital or even wose 6' underground. we all don't want that and i know your parents would hate that if it happens. this life and death you are talking about and if you stay it make end up in death.

Answer 8

A person that loves you does not hit you.Stand up and tell him this will be the last time he puts hands on someone that is not his CHILD. Tell him to get another job if he is that stressed or find another punching bag, seriously.There are too many men out there for you to end up with a jerk. Hey,what is a few years or months compared to the rest of your life.??

Answer 9

Leave! If he hit you once, he will do it again. He may have problems, but that is NEVER an excuse. Don't believe it was a one-time thing. It will only get worse. You must have enough respect for yourself to get away from him and find someone who will treat you with the respect that you deserve.

Answer 10

Leave him there are way to many women out there that just take it like the deserve it or something its sick if he really loves you he wont let you go but definitely leave and make him believe you are leaving him. If you do get back with him don't ever give him another chance to abuse you once is already to much

Answer 11

Try to break up or leave for awhile. If he loves you, then he won't let you get away. Just give him some time to think about what he wants and also what you want. If you do love each other, there should be a way to work it out without causing heart break.