We just moved to our new apt for 2 mths. I'm a working mother wif 2 kids. Everyday when I reached home I need to do all the housework by myself n look after my kids. My hubby will sit n relax n I realise tat whenever our kids request for something or talk to him he seem no respond or sometimes he will scolded them. I have talked to him bout this many times but problem still not solve n he still continue the same. Anyone out there can give me some help?
2006-08-23 13:45:45 · 17 answers · asked by llceva 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Give him an ultimatum. If he cares, he'll straighten up. Works like a charm, nearly every time :)
2006-08-23 13:50:05 · answer #1 · answered by Amanda K 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds overcome with the thought that the life he had with you sharing experiences together has succombed to that of the hum drum everyday tired parents syndrome. He goes to work and sees his money and efforts disapper into the newly found needs of parenting and tired wife. While his thoughts of raising glorious children take root in his head, he sees no particular granduer ahead for him personally... nor you which emburdens him to the point he sulks and seems to ignore his immediate surroundings.
Throwing him out is no answer for you as it will really leave you with no help at all and maybe even curtail what income you do have. No, I think your marriage still has it's fire but you will have to find ways to kindle it. As a man, the best way I can see to do that is to think heavily on the things that thrill him and then arrange for a babysitter so you can do that thing WITH HIM. Make memories of good times while you have children so that he can look back at times WITH kids with positive feelings and excitement. Show him that kids aren't absorbing your every interest.
If he is the man I am, he will come up with equality and recognize your efforts in keeping him interested and happy. I would hope he would respond with motherly attributes also and show a bit more help around the house and with the kids.
Good luck!
2006-08-23 13:57:05 · answer #2 · answered by Les 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
used to have the same problem. my husband and I fought over this, well I don't know how many times, I quit picking up after him all together. The kids are old enough to take on some of the responsibilities. So I delegate dishes and laundry and vacuuming to others I let my husband know that I was not his mother and I would no longer pick up any of his messes. and then I didn't. if he drank soda and left the empty cans lying around they stayed right where they were. It didn't take too long and he began to adjust. I even didn't cook for him when he wanted something different than what I made. He either made it himself or he didn't eat. loluck
2006-08-23 13:56:45 · answer #3 · answered by I-o-d-tiger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you need him for-he obviously will not change for would have already and no amount of talking will do it. Suggest family counseling for its not just you that's sad but bet kids are sad that they lack a father for they need more than just a body being there. Contact your Community Service Board(County) Blue pages.-will help You find low cost counseling for sounds like you can use for he probably will not do it. Counseling can strengthen you so can better decide how you wan the rest of your life to be. Wish you a better and happy life
2006-08-23 13:54:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I was a young mother I use to have a chore schedule made up of daily/weekly/monthly chores and it was divided up evenly between my hubby and me as we both worked outside the home and had littles ones too - no where does it say you have to work and come home and do all the work too - either your old man needs to learn to do some house work or you need to back off and learn to live in somewhat of a mess until he comments and then you can start in on him. - good luck
2006-08-23 13:50:29 · answer #5 · answered by redneckgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She desires a psychiatrist - and that i'm no longer being facetious. She desires expert help and despite if she would not prefer to, she could see a doctor. She has emotional issues and besides the shown fact which you the two do no longer see it, her harming herself is a fashion of controlling you. It gets you working to her and giving her a lot of interest. that's a variety of blackmail. in case you do no longer do what i choose and make me consistently happy, i'm going to harm myself and for this reason harm you. Hurting herself in all probability takes away emotional soreness for her interior the quick term yet that's no longer common behaviour and extremely risky for her and for you too as you adore her. Get her the scientific help that she desires. there's a reason in all probability in her formative years that makes her do those issues to herself and she or he could discover ways to interrupt out of this risky cycle while you're the two to have a happy existence and courting. stable success.
2016-11-05 11:58:30 · answer #6 · answered by awad 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well...your hubby seems to thing that the dinner will be served by herslef...and that the kinds will gorw up alone...and that the apartmant is going to get clean if you order him to do it....he realy seems to thing he got the magick lamb in aladin !!! i am sorry but that pisses me off !! there are many children who suffer by not having the parents attention and althought you are trying i thing that mabye you should try it with wizdom. like...he expect his dinner...well if he wants to eat he can make him self...or if he wants to sleep he will need to change the sheets on the bad...yuo dotn have time, and niether your kids woman to do everything and feel bad so that can he lie down his entire life. show some courage...you have done nothing wrong !!! and make ultimatum...if he works he will be home f he doesent he doesent deserve you !!!
2006-08-23 13:58:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the problem is that he "simply" does not care about u or anyone else but himself, he is selfish to the bone, a person like that should be left alone, there are other men out there that can find something good in you and can care for you and yours, your wasting your time,,walls dont talk back, get it and get on, good luck.
2006-08-23 14:03:44 · answer #8 · answered by tone284 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Share responsabilities
2006-08-23 13:52:50 · answer #9 · answered by spyblitz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
remind him.. it takes 2 people ,to raise children,and run the house... can you help please ...and no ..help. doesn't include the money he brings in..men are like children as well they love to be rewarded with treats..do some special stuff with him too..start teaching kids the chores as well they have to know that as well....my family we all have stuff we have to do in order for our house to run properly..It doesnt work unless everyone plays..good luck
2006-08-23 13:57:32 · answer #10 · answered by Ken and Wendy M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋