What is the proper dicipline for lying, disrespect,dishoner, and deceit repeadedly.
2006-08-23 11:45:06 · 36 answers · asked by coker5563 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
A good bare-a.ss spanking
2006-08-23 11:46:32 · answer #1 · answered by . 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Trust me..if you try to dicipline her, then she will have hard feelings against you for a long time, because in a way, diciplining her is trying to take her mother's position, and that will make her rebel even more. I have a step mom, and whenever she tried to dicipline me, I hated that she tried to control me in the first place because she wasn't my mother! So, leave the diciplining to her real parents. I'm just stating out of experience.
Instead, just try to be her friend, or as close as you can get!
2006-08-23 11:50:55 · answer #2 · answered by eaglefeather831 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The proper discipline for lying, disrespect, dishonor, and deceit repeatedly? First of all her natural parent should be the primary person to discipline her. Physical punishment esp. from you is definitely not a good idea. Have you thought about family counseling?
2006-08-23 11:47:26 · answer #3 · answered by WendyD1999 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, it's not going to be easy. This type of behaviour is only occurring because whoever raised her to be 17 allowed it to happen. I would put the smack down on her. Don't let her do anything. Make her earn YOUR trust. Let her know that trust is one of the hardest things to earn and that if you have it, you're golden, but if you break it - she's going to be living hell on earth. When I was younger, my parents raised me in a way that I have always been truthful with them. I knew when I had done wrong and I always knew that if I was honest with them straight up, things wouldn't be as bad. The truth will always surface. Let her know that you'll accept the situation if she comes to you with the truth rather than you finding it out later from someone else.
Hope this helps!
2006-08-23 11:50:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There isn't any. You can try to dicipline her, but she's probably not going to listen because
#1 the age she is, she's close to an adult which makes her feel more independent.
#2 You're not her mother.
Just because your not her mother does not mean that you can't dicipline her, it just means it's going to be a lot harder to dicipline her.
What does her Dad have to say??
Does he give in to her all the time??
Good Luck:)
-Jenn
2006-08-23 11:48:47 · answer #5 · answered by jmt4127 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to discuss the rules with your wife, and if possible with her ex. Everyone must be on the same page, or she will exploit the lack of communications.
Some lying is natural for some teens who are trying to establish their independence. She could get over it. Disrespect, dishonor and deceit should not be tolerated, so you'll need to work out the consequences together and stick with the plan (everyone!) for her sake. It could be a symptom of something worse though.
It sounds to me like she could be using drugs. Please go see the Website references below. If you catch her out, all privileges like cell phone, money, use of the car, long visits with friend out of the house etc need to be stopped immediately. Then you will need to go into family counselling together. She will have to earn back your trust, through random drug testing and whatever other measures you decide on. My heart goes out to you.
2006-08-23 12:04:38 · answer #6 · answered by Zelda Hunter 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try looking into the "systematic training for effective parenting of teens" program. It seriously helps because it explains the goals of bad behaviour so that you can meet the needs of the child in a pro-active and positive way. I will post a link to the course manual below.
2006-08-23 11:51:44 · answer #7 · answered by Loulabelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I know it is hard to have a step child but in no way should you has a parent be disrepected. I know you are probably trying to win her love and dont want to discipline because you will probably feel she will hate you.. Instead of all this try sitting her down and talk to her let her know you care and are there to listen. I am not sure what have you have tried to do so far but I do know all this outrage is because she probably needs someone to talk to and you know but she might not..that you are that person
2006-08-23 11:49:08 · answer #8 · answered by Daniela 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is what teenagers do. It has nothing to do with her being your step daughter. What do you think is the correct discipline? She should have less freedom, she needs to earn her privledges through respect, honesty and trust. If she lies about where she is going, then the next time she asks to go somewhere, the answer is "no, the last time you went somewhere you lied about it. So I am unable to believe you this time." If you show me some respect and prove that I can trust you, the answer may be yes the next time"
2006-08-23 11:52:03 · answer #9 · answered by Deb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ground her. Take away EVERYTHING. I mean no phone, no computer, no car, she can ride the bus, no rides. My Mom would take the actual phone with her to work so I couldn't use it while she was gone. If she continues when she hits 18 you can kick her out. My Mom did and if she didn't I wouldnt be who I am today. Be a tough parent. I respect my Mom and she is my best friend. I got over it and realized I deserved it. Good Luck.
2006-08-23 11:48:46 · answer #10 · answered by taz4x4512 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should talk to her father and the 2 of you come up with a plan that you both back up together and stick with it. This will only work if you and your husband are on the same page and stick together. Why is she acting out this way? Does she treat just you this way? Others?A good idea is to find out what is goingon in her world.Good luck.
2006-08-23 11:49:38 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋