Ok to spank your children?

Question

I have a 5 year old I never spank. I dicipline her with time outs and when she grows out of that I'll use push ups. She always seems to do the right thing and isn't disobediant. Who else thinks this is the way to go? Or do you believe spare the rod spoil a child?

Answer 1

I have three boys, 9, 5, and 8 months. They youngest is a little young and doesn't really need discipline, My 9 year old boy has always been very good as it breaks his heart when he knows you are mad at him, so a stern eye works with him. My 5 year old, he is a different story. He does not respond to time out at all. I do spank him but only after counting to 5 and giving him ample warning.
I think it all depends on what the child responds to. If you've exhausted all of your non-physical options, a smack might be the way to go. Now-on another hand, I do not smack my child in front of anyone and will do so in a private place. I do not believe in humiliating a child. But he knows when I tell him we need to take a walk, he's in for it. Sometimes just the threat of me starting to count or saying we need to take a walk works. Another thing to consider, if your child is hungry or tired, no matter what you do, they are not going to listen well at all.

So I say rule out the basics, try non-physical discipline, and if all else fails, yes, spanking is okay!

Answer 2

I don't think spanking works. It might scare a kid into not doing something, but how long would that realistically last? Hitting a child, to me, just says that a parent is too lazy to think of another, smarter way to discipline. It doesn't show any use of the brain we've been given. I absolutely do not believe the saying "spare the rod, spoil the child." I think that as a child grows older who's been spanked, they may lose respect for the parent who does it. And in some cases, spanking when angry can just lead to abuse. There's a fine line that one can cross, and it'd be easier to cross in the midst of anger.

I believe you're on the right track. My parents raised me w/out spanking me and that was rare for the 1950s/60s.

Not sure about the push-ups, but maybe it's worth a try. I think taking away privileges is a good method as the child gets older.

Answer 3

Your methods obviously work with your child. As long as she listens to you and stops acting up or being bad, then good for you.

I am 51, and have 2 sons that are now 20 and 22. When they were little guys, they were absolute terrors, and no amount of shouting, threats, and time outs would make a bit of difference to them..my only solution was a good swat on the ***, and a supervised time in the corner. By the time they were ready to go into thier teens, we had a good understanding of eachother,..and differences were talked out. I now have 2 remarkably polite well centered sons, that I am extremely proud of. (They had me plenty worried though!!!!)

Answer 4

I think it sounds like it is effective. I never spanked my children either. Did time outs and then as they got older started taking away things that mattered to them or had them do chores. My son is grown and turned out great. My 14 yr old daughter hates getting her things taken away, and does extra chores and it seems to work great. She avoids trouble at all costs, as she loves her social life. Being without a phone at her age is the worst thing ever she says. Keep up the good work

Answer 5

I think that this depends upon the level of disciplin sometimes I dont have a problem with a spanking but other times I do! It depends upon the deed and upon what form of disciplin you use instead of a spanking. I won't say that spanking a child is wrong but I won't say it's right either! If your method of a non-spanking lifestyle works...stick with it!

Answer 6

In a nutshell.... how do you think kids got so disrespectful and in more trouble nowdays??
There's a lot of debate on this subject. The bible says to do this. So I think most christians do this.
I have to say that I don't understand why God says to do this, when it doesnt' always work.
My 16 yr old has learning problems, cognitive problems, etc.
And she has NEVER responded to spankings. It's like she doesn't understand sometimes.
Tell you the truth, NO form of punishment has worked for her and we are having trouble to this day with her. But that's not to say we never tried. I tried everything I knew.
When they took punishment out of schools, well.... you see how the kids are today.
Think about it, years ago kids, and people in general, so so much well behaved (most of them anyway)
All I got to say is, whatever punishment you choose, you sow what you reap!!

Answer 7

If time outs are working then that is great. However, this method does NOT work for all children... for those children it is perfectly acceptable to use other methods of discipline.

Answer 8

Timeouts are the best, i was hit when i was spanked when i was a child, i now see how my brother disiplins my neice, and it works very well.

Answer 9

I applaud you!! Most parents and/or guardians believe that is the way to correct your children. I wholeheartedly disagree. If you can find non-violent ways to discipline your children, that's the best way to go. It also teaches them responsibility and respect. Way to go!!

Answer 10

geez what is up with white people and time-outs?