Will I Turn Out Like My Dad??

Question

When i was a child my father was very agressive and violent, i have been brought up around violence and family hatred. I keep contatc with him but not alot. I am older now and i am really worried if i will turn out like him, i would really hate to be like him and treat my children like he did to me and my siblings. Is there a really big chance of me turning out like him????

When i was a child my father was very agressive and violent, i have been brought up around violence and family hatred. I keep contatc with him but not alot. I am older now and i am really worried if i will turn out like him. I am not a violent person myself, my friends can't even say me and violent in the same sentence but i am still young. I would really hate to be like him and treat my children like he did to me and my siblings. Is there a really big chance of me turning out like him????

Answer 1

Well my dad was the same way and i noticed when i get mad i would do somthings like punch my pillow and i have wondered the exact same things! i think that since you watched your dad act that way he did you might, but not as intence just think about what your doing like i ketch my self a lot and then stop it so just try to be careful and really watch your self and think of other ways you could express stuff thats what i try to do... hope that helps :)

Answer 2

There is a chance, temperment might be hereditary, but I think one disturbing thing I have discovered as a parent, almost all of the things that my father did (he was not violent but possible bordered on verbally abusive) that made me scream "I will never do that to my kids" I am finding myself doing at some level. We tend to fall back on what we know, which is how we were raised.
This though does not mean that you will deffinitely be abusive, the fact that you are concerned at all gives you a very big step in the right direction.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

You have the opportunity to break the chain of violence. You already are aware of what had happened in your family and you do not want it repeated when you have your own family. If you feel that you are becomming overly angry for no real reason, then you might want to get some therapy to overcome and change. Good luck to you!

Answer 4

The fact that you have put thought into this, means you are a thoughful person who will think things through before becoming agressive. I think that if you just remember how he acted and how much you hated it then you will automatically steer clear of this type of behavior.

Answer 5

Its all up to you. Its a choice only you can make. You dont automatically become violent because your father was. You just need to figure out different ways of handling things then what you learned from him. If you dont want to be abusive its up to you.

Answer 6

Very slim chance. Since you are aware that it is inappropriate behavior, and you do not wish to act that way, you can easily stop it.

If you think that you are beginning to become violent, seek counseling, and they can help you find ways to direct your anger in other directions.

Answer 7

Hey, everyone has a different personality. The chances are very unlikely. If you don't want to be like your dad, you won't. Just be cool and calm. Are you like him right now?

Answer 8

Not if you don't want to.You can learn to stay calm with your children and not lose your temper like your father did.Anything's possible. Good Luck

Answer 9

Since you know the problem you should know the pitfalls to avoid. You should get counseling even if you are not showing any signs just to make peace with it for yourself.

Answer 10

If you try your hardest not to act like him, then you will not. The whole thing is you need to stop worrying or else it is going to end up with you ending up like him.