My mom has never had any friends or non-immediate family members in her life to support her. She is usually very lonely and becomes more and more depressed as time goes on. It bothers and saddens her when she sees all three of her kids and even her husband hanging out with friends. I am 18, her middle child, and I’ve told her I would be happy to go out to lunch or just out of the house with her when she feels this way. Still, she is depressed because I also have a friend. I feel so guilty. She isn’t the social type, so I can’t simply tell her to “go join something” (I am also shy, so I understand) and she certainly does not want to go on medication for depression. She also cannot afford therapy. What can I possibly do to help her? It kills me to see her like this because I love her so much and I’m desperate to help. Please be kind, this is my mother we’re talking about.
2006-08-23 04:30:53 · 7 answers · asked by kid_at_heart 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Have a Mother/Daughter day with your Mom, just the two of you. Go shopping for new clothes, go to the hair salon, go to lunch, go to a movie (comedy of course). But make sure you don't bring anyone else along unless it one of your other siblings. Have Fun!!! I hope your Mom feels better!!!!!
2006-08-23 04:38:39 · answer #1 · answered by Tonya W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you thought about maybe inviting one or two of your friends and their mothers over for dinner. (if you like any of your friends mothers) This way she doesn't have to leave the house, she can meet them on home court. There will be other people there to take the spotlight off of her. And with more people in the room there is less of a chance of that awkward silence. After dinner don't opt to watch a movie, you cannot talk at get to know anyone during a movie, but try a game of cards or whatever seems fun. I also have a mother like this and inviting people over is the only way I can get her to socialize. For the next two or three visits you may have to initialize contact with them for your mother again until she can do it on her own, maybe this way you can bring a little of the outside world in and show her its not such a bad place. I hope this helped.
2006-08-23 11:45:41 · answer #2 · answered by silent*scream 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Offer to take a dance or yoga class with her. Tell her that the only way to get out of this depression is to do something about it. That means going out. It will make it easier for her to do that if you go with her and a good place to start is taking a class. There are tons of classes out there that are cheap, I'm sure you can find something that suits you both. At a public class you will both meet people you can identify with and people who obviously have the same interests as you. Encourage her to talk to people at these places (all you have to do to start a conversation is ask a simple question, like "Where did you hear about this class?".) She won't get any happier by sitting on her bum at home doing nothing. If she wants to feel better she has to take the first step.
2006-08-23 11:36:42 · answer #3 · answered by corbeyelise 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh sweetie pie,
I spent my entire childhood and many years as an adult dealing with my mothers depression and I am so disgusted with it. She would NEVER help herself. I know you want to help your mother, but she suffers from depression and it is a very selfish and self centered condition. Refusing medication is not an intelligent choice. By refusing meds, she has chosen to live this way. I am glad that you love your mother, BUT SHE HAS GOT TO HELP HERSELF. Encourage her to get help, your counselors at school may be able to give you information. Do not allow her illness to bring you down or make you feel guilty. You have every right to live your own life. Good luck sweetie
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2006-08-23 11:48:17 · answer #4 · answered by Annie R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What does she like to do as far as hobbies go? Find something she really enjoys doing and try to do those things with her... for example...if she likes cooking, take a cooking class together or spend a day cooking...or go for a bike ride, a picnic..etc
2006-08-23 11:40:26 · answer #5 · answered by Maestro 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take her on a weekend getaway, maybe to a spa, or something, get her out of the house, there are places you can get help for her depression thru a community service. good luck, i can tell you really care about your mom.
2006-08-23 11:45:45 · answer #6 · answered by julialng 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can't think of anything you can do. she will have to do this by herself. she has to get out and she will meet someone
2006-08-23 11:38:47 · answer #7 · answered by BIG DADDY 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋