My 6yr old is very intelligent........?

Question

I find lately that she is becoming very obnoxious and rude. She has an aswer for everything we say and back chats us terribly. Will this pass or am in for a hard time when she becomes a teen????

Answer 1

We have been going through the exact same thing with our little girl. She's smarter than other kids in certain areas, and she's very good at reading humans and knowing how to push their buttons to make them mad. She started being very rude to me and my husband. And my thinking was just like yours, if she can be this obnoxous now, what are we in for when she's a pre-teen or teen? We came up with a solution that is working, for now. Every time she is rude, we take away a toy, whichever toy is her favorite of the day. Then we put a star on the calendar so she knows what day we will give it back, it's usually a week. But if she misbehaves, we go and erase the star and move it to the next day and the next. This is giving her a visual record of how her behaviour is affecting her consequences. If she's good and not snotty or rude for a day, we'll go move the star on the calendar back a day. She still has her moments, yesterday was a bad day, but her rudeness and mean tone of voice are coming less and less often. Good Luck.
P.S.- And if she's rude or snotty at school, the other kids won't stand for it, kids, especially girls can be brutal. Once she realizes that behaving rudely to people makes for a very lonely recess, she'll change her ways at school too.
And don't forget to "catch" her being nice, every time my daughter says or does something nice, we make sure we praise her for it.

Answer 2

My little brother is 11 and has been amazing since he was 2. When he was only 2 years old, he could name every president on every dollar bill without even looking at them. When he was in second grade he knew all 50 states in alphebetical order. Now he has memorized almost 100 digits of pi, A large portion of the constitution, and the binary code (i dont even know what that is). He will look things up on the internet and just keep getting smarter and smarter. Everyone hates it when he corrects them. We find it very rude and obnoxious, but i guess we just have to deal with it. I mean, my brother, and your daughter are going to do something important one day. And if we disencourage them to learn more than that may not happen.

All i can tell you is, when she is being obnoxious, you can just her that you are having an adult conversation and she should go in her room and do something. Maybe that could help. but whatever you do, don't get mad at her for being smart. If she corrects you, you could simply say thank you, or you could explain to her that it is embarrassing for her to correct you in public. She will understand.

Answer 3

Intelligence and rude and obnoxious don't necessarily go hand-in-hand. Yes. If you don't tell her you aren't going to put up with rudeness she isn't going to learn.

When you say "back chats", though, do you mean she's "mouthing off" at you in a rude way, or do you mean if you say "wear your coat or you'll be cold" she'll politely say, "I won't be cold because I'll be riding my bike"? Having an answer for everything isn't necessarily a bad thing if that answer is given politely and respectfully. If she's yelling it or otherwise being rude that's a different thing.

Obnoxious and rude has to be stopped. (Have you ever watched "Super Nanny" on television? She has good tips. She also apparently as a book or two out.) Tell you daughter that you want her to share her thoughts, concerns and even differences in opinions with you; but nobody is going to be rude and obnoxious. When she is tell her. Tell her, "Look. We don't talk to you that way. We are not going to have you talk to us this way."

Bottom line: No. It will not pass. This is one you have to do something about now.

Answer 4

We have a very intelligent daughter too and she tried the same thing. First of all, kids will be kids. That said, it's up to us parents to control it. They need to learn to use that intelligence properly. We told our daughter the first rule is "treat others as you'd want to be treated". Then, however you acted toward us, we'd return the exact same thing. She didn't like the rudeness. Kids want to be liked, so they don't like the thought that how they act will put others off. We stuck by this and she passed that stage rather fast. We just instill to use her intelligence for good. If she didn't change her tone or whatever it might be at that time, she'd lose privileges or get punished. One of the things that works best is sending her to her room until she can be civil. The key is sticking to it. If you don't help them control it now, the teen years can be horrible. Not all teen years have to be bad. Our kids learn from what we teach them and they take that with them.

Good luck!!

Answer 5

My daughter was very intelligent also, and she was a good child, I think because I had twins shortly after her to occupy her. I didn't know it then, but she was a genius. (141 IQ) she wrote a legible note to me at 4 years old! but she turned into a horrible early teen, partly because the school would not advance her to skip grades like they do in the movies. MY advice is have her tested immediately and/or just give her things to challenge her. Just as a pet dog, they tend to become distructive if they are bored. Give her upper level things to do. One grade or two grade ahead and see what she can do with it. IF you do have a gifted child, then challenging them will be key and be the challenge to you to keep up with them. As for bad behavior.. I have no advice. I just hope that the challenges will make the rude/bad stuff go away on it's own with your help and decipline. Present the challenges as fun. BEST of luck.

Answer 6

if she is six, you'd better discipline her now before it is too late. That is the personality most kids develop and more or less she will become bad if she get spoiled at this time.

don't use physical punishment. but share the pain with her. For example, if she doesn't want to eat certain things. Starve with her and tell her many people out there in the world are not as fortune.

As far as her mouth goes, you have to watch what she is saying.. punish her with less award so she can control her mouth

Answer 7

It is completely up to you to nip in in the bud now! Do not tolerate it, she can continue all she wants, when she is sitting in a bare room, with no toys, no TV, no birthday parties she gets to go to, day after day, eventually it will kick in. She is training you on what she can get away with. With my five year old who started getting "sassy" and defiant I tried everything. Pretty soon I tried the 1,2, 3 method of showing her three circles with the numbers on them, her first offense was "1" and so on, when she got to 3, she went to bed RIGHT AFTER dinner, even before her two year old brother! It took three days, then we didn't even get to number 2....how long it will last who knows, I just know no matter how much she tests me I don't give in, don't make threats unless I follow through. Your daughter is normal, going through not being a baby any longer, sort of growing up and feeling out of sorts...she will just test you and want limits but I don't think it makes it that she will be a bad teenager....

Answer 8

Join the club... This is the age of discovery. By 7 they know every button you own and push them readily!

It does however show intelligence on their part. I can't stand good little perfect monkey children that do everything they are told. They have to learn to challenge and the way to teach them to learn from their mistakes is to always remember that YOU are smarter than they are and don't fall for it.

Most parents don't understand that they are the smart ones and react exactly how the child expects them to every time. That teaches them to manipulate, not delegate intellectually.

Answer 9

Yes this will pass on into her teen years if it is not stopped now. Intelligence does not give her a pass to be obnoxious.

Have you taken her for an IQ test?

Answer 10

If youre not a parent dont answer these questions.
I think we share the same 6 yr old......:) Mine is the same way. We have taken away toys and threatened her to take a nap, she hates naps. It works sometimes. We have not let her have her friends over and that seems to be working. Good luck