For some unknown reason, it seems that my girlfriend and I keep fighting!It hurts me inside to think that her and I keep fighting! I just don't know what to do anymore!!! Like, our most recent fight was just this past Monday on which she wouldn't even speak and/or talk to me about it!!!!!! It seems like the inside of me just wants to cry!!!! Now, I talked to my current girlfriend(with whom,I'll have you know I am STILL "in hot water")!! Like,ok, just last evening on the telephone, when I specifically asked her if she even cares about me and/or our relationship,her reply on the other end of the telephone line was "I don't know"!!!!!Now this past Sunday, my girlfriend and I were watching a couple movies on television @ my house here in Pennsylvania! She(my girlfriend)started calling me "picky/fussy"!!!!!!!!!!! Am I doing or saying something wrong??? I don't know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please--I need help!!!!! When will I ever get out of the doghouse with my girlfriend?????Help me!!!
2006-08-23 00:18:36 · 11 answers · asked by michael_kleman2003 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
if she regrets you asking her out, dump her... move on... sounds like she isn't into you anymore... her loss.. find someone who will respect you more...
2006-08-23 00:21:54 · answer #1 · answered by Forlorn Hope 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need help for sure, but it may not be exactly what you think you need help with. My suggestion would be to figure out why it is that you feel so enamored of a person with whom you fight all the time? Questions such as, why do you like being in the doghouse? Are you picky/fussy? You say you don't know but somewhere down inside you, you do know.
2006-08-23 08:09:50 · answer #2 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While relationships are supposed to be work (meaning the dedication of effort and concentration), they are not supposed to be a constant source of angst, which is what I am reading here. If you two fight (and fight and fight) and it makes you want to cry inside AND when you ask her if she cares about you and she says "I don't know" .... (she doesn't know ?) then you are not in a relationship.
Again, she doesn't know ? How can she not know ? She can be angry; she can be upset; she can think there are things "wrong" but all the time she has to KNOW that she cares about you or there just isn't any reason to work out everything.
You will get out of the "doghouse" with this girl when you choose to get out. We get treated as we train people to treat us. If you continue to accept this lack of communication (you don't even know why she thinks you are fussy or why you are "in the doghouse") then you will never achieve an open, honest communication with this girl. Period. As long as you allow her to treat you this way instead of the way you should be treated, this will continue.
If you two continue to fight for "unknown" reasons, then whatever you are fighting about is not the problem but rather the symptom and the illness may be that you aren't right for each other. Things just grate...don't fit.....don't quite mesh.....aren't quite happy...... You will never know that unless and until you refuse to accept "I don't know" as an answer. You have to know why you care about her and why you want to stay with her or you should be leaving. She has to know why she cares about you and why she wants to stay in the relationship and work it out or she should be leaving. Neither of you should be accepting the status quo here, because it isn't working.
Sometimes fighting can get to be a habit - it's familiar and the couple can then begin to feel uneasy if they are NOT in strife. I know it sounds strange, but it is the same psychological reason that some battered women go back to their batterers - it is familiar; they know how to react to it. It is possible that the two of you are so used to fighting and sniping (or she is used to sniping and you are used to being sniped) that stopping the behavior is almost incomprehensible. WhatEVER would you put in its place ?
Sometimes the way to stop it is to just stop it. The two of you have to agree to COMPLETELY change the way you relate to each other. No sniping....no arguing.....no non-answers (like "I don't know")....you have to substitute brutal honesty for each behavior you set aside and then maybe you two can find out what is wrong and find your way back to what is right.
If not, then you both owe it to the other to let go of the relationship so that you both can find some happiness with someone else.
2006-08-23 07:34:42 · answer #3 · answered by two 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time to find a new girlfriend. This one obviously does not care about you, is controlling and manipulative,. Move on with your life! There are decent and caring girls out there!
2006-08-23 07:23:54 · answer #4 · answered by fairybell 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she can say only that she doesn't know. Then she probably is seeing some else and just haven't found away to leave you, or she is using you for something.
2006-08-23 07:59:01 · answer #5 · answered by dogman 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit her down and tell her how u fell.if it doesnt get better then leave her before u get hurt a lot more if ur meant to be together ull be together but not like this,.best of luck to u
2006-08-23 07:23:24 · answer #6 · answered by orangejuice85 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick her to the curb Dude. No respect here.
2006-08-23 07:28:10 · answer #7 · answered by Sarcastic Sid 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are asking why she is acting like this, when you need to look at the way you talk to her & treat her.
2006-08-23 07:22:59 · answer #8 · answered by lostintheclover 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if it is soooo difficult then first try to talk to her about how u feel and if things still dont change then u can leave the house.
2006-08-23 07:22:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're her lap dog.
Get on with your life and find someone else.
She's got you on a short leash.
2006-08-23 07:21:21 · answer #10 · answered by Angela 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋