My 17 year old daughter came to me with the thought that she is bisexual. she says she feels that it is correct because she took a quiz and answered it honestly and got the results that said bi- curious. I explained to her that she is only 17 and is still trying to find herself and not to commit to any certain thing right now until she truly finds herself. I made sure she knew that no matter what I love her just the same but inside I am absolutely crushed. I have no problem with gay or bi sexual individuals but I dont know how to handle this because its my child. Help? I dont know how to handle this or her questions????
2006-08-22 23:55:50 · 20 answers · asked by anginfla 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
theres a reason they call it bi-curious, it a thought, not a phase. try and scare her a little. ask questions, try to get involved. make her think about everything. then, it'll be one way or the other
2006-08-22 23:59:35 · answer #1 · answered by phe_03 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
CHILL OUT already. RELAX, the test doesn't mean anything. You should ask her how she feels about women in general. I mean this as in what she actually think about getting naked with another female and making out, having sex, or just fooling around. IF and this is IF she is comfortable with any of the above then I'd say she may very well be gay, or bi at a minimum. Now if she doesn't feel as comfortable doing the same things listed with a male then I'd say she is a lesbian. BUT ONLY she will know this information and when you speak with her don't try to lead her in ANY direction. If she is gay she is gay and there isn't anything you will do to change it. So you have to accept it and be happy for her. And by the way, YES I have gays, and lesbians in my family.
2006-08-23 00:07:21 · answer #2 · answered by GRUMPY 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As you already said, she is only 17 and those hormones are RAGING through her body.
AS for the results of the test... and we all know how reliable they are... especially internet tests... try testing your IQ... the results vary from test to test... so it is difficult to determine the accuracy of them.
The results said bi-curious... not lesbian or bisexual... just curious... and as a young woman your daughter is like most girls...
CURIOUS
about everything...
and that is healthy.
The results of indulging that curiosity can be embarrasing and humiliating, and she will need your love and support.
Your daughter is a wonderful woman learning about her world...
You still love her and you would support other people in their life choices... so make sure that you are ok with this...
She is still your daughter, just love her.
she will one day want to have kids and family, just like her loving parents.
Would you be happier if your daughter was saying that she is heterosexual and ready to indulge her curiosity, with every hot guy she meets??
there is no easy time for parents, you will always worry for your kids. Just love them, there is nothing more that you can do than that. And that is what counts.
2006-08-23 00:06:14 · answer #3 · answered by Tam G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure your daughter is bi-curious. I think most teenagers are curious. With the world today as it is and children having sex younger and younger it is inevitable they want to experiment. As for answering a quiz, what kind of quiz was it? Where did she get "the quiz". Ask her if she has experimented yet, tell her to be honest. If you have problems with the questions she presents perhaps you might want to have her see a personal counselor who has training in these areas. Teenage years are so hard on parents and the children.
2006-08-23 00:06:56 · answer #4 · answered by fairybell 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mom I think you answered it perfectly. I feel the same way. I wouldn't know what I would do if my daughter told me that also. The reason why you are crushed is because you want to envision your daughter in the future like the rest of the parents. You imagine seeing your baby girl get married to a man, having kids with a man, and being happy with a man. And that is okay. All you can honestly do is be there for her and hopefully she find her true self.
2006-08-23 00:00:43 · answer #5 · answered by Miss. Tee98 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it really affects you that much, maybe get some councelling...get some debriefing about the subject. Because yes other parents go through it but once you are faced with it it maybe hard to deal with even when you accept that lifestyle...it will come but for now just baby steps. Hope everything works well!
2006-08-23 00:02:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be there for her when she needs someone to talk to. That is great she was able to share it with you. I commend you for being so understanding and loving. Most kids would keep their mouth shut. Is there the slightest possiblity that she could be telling you this for shock value. My daughter is now 24 but when she was that age she would tell me that she had a 37 year old Harley Riding boyfriend that she was going to marry.
2006-08-23 00:01:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, this is a tough one. i once dated a girl who toldme she was bi. She said she was bi cause it atracted boys to her. She also had had bad relationships with boys and found comfort in woman's sensitive side. wat can i say, sorry, we men are pigs. but luckily not all of us. i dont know how u could try to talk to her about this, the culture we live in is so infatuated we homosexuality these days and i think it is all driven by lust and lack of self control. if u know of any male role models, point them out to her and speak to her how important it is to have a male companion in ur life. after all, thats how she was conceived, and im sure she is far more beautiful and special than all the other girls. speak positive things into her life. good luck.
2006-08-23 00:03:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes at that age people know what their sexual preferance is. It is really awsome that she can feel comfortable enought with you to talk about it. You must be an amazing mom! That was tuff enough for her to say it. Just accept what she says with no opinon and when she grows up more I am sure that she will figure out who she is.
2006-08-23 00:17:06 · answer #9 · answered by michiganwife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wel i really think u shud take her to a vry gud counsellor in order to take this stuff out of her mind.And quizes of such kind alwys dont turn out correct as per me i took up a test and it says i'm gud in math but i was never gud in math n i'm pretty gud in science.Dont worry everythin is gonna b ok.
2006-08-22 23:59:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋