Can your boyfriend rape you?

Question

Sometimes i feel like my boyfriend is sort of raping me, but not really. (Rape is a subject no one should take lightly) but it seems like my boyfriend is having sex with me, rather than us having sex together.i love him, but sometimes he just get so into it, even when im not interested. help...

i should probably mention that i do say no, but he think im just being playful..

Answer 1

If you don't want to have sex, and you say so, and he has sex with you anyway, then yes, he raped you.

If you truly think he thinks you are just being playful when you say no, (and you aren't just making excuses for him), then you need to talk to him SERIOUSLY and NOT in a "joking", "playful", or "sexy, pouty" voice, tell him (NOT when you are making out, having sex, or in any other way being physically intimate) that when you say no, you MEAN NO, and that when he continues you feel that he is not respecting you, your feelings, or your body.

DO NOT compromise on that issue! It is YOUR body, and if you don't want to have sex, then you don't have to have sex!

BUT - if you do "act playful" by "being hard to get" and/or say no, just so he can "convince" you, then you need to STOP that RIGHT NOW - because it's actions like these that often lead to date rape - because there are men that have been taught (sadly) by women that no just means "convince or make me so I don't feel guilty for giving in later".

I'm NOT saying that's what you have done, just that yes, you can be raped by your boyfriend (or, for that matter, even your husband), and you have the right to say what happens with your body, but you have the responsibility to make sure you say so in a way that's clear.

If, after telling your bf that when you say no, you mean NO, and you expect him to respect that from now on, if he doesn't take you seriously, and if he doesn't feel horrible that he had been misunderstanding your cues - then DITCH HIM and call a rape hotline where they can listen to you and talk to you in more detail about your particular situation and they can advise you about the best course of action to take.

Answer 2

Sometimes it's hard to know the difference between whether you are letting him have sex because you love him (when you're not in the mood) or whether he's physically forcing you. The laws of many states say that it's possible to be raped by a partner you're having a relationship with. In fact, there have been cases where wives have had their husbands charged with it (or vice versa). But being raped and proving it may be two different things. If you feel you have been raped you should go to the Police ASAP.

Answer 3

Yes it could be called rape, but only if he is doing it against your will. Husbands and boyfriends have committed rape on there partners. But if you are talking about you just not being into when he is or the way he is, then that is not rape. Try talking to him about your sex life. What you would like and don't like. If he really cares about you and loves you he will listen.
Best of luck.

Answer 4

Just because you're not interested doesn't make it rape because you are still consenting to the sex. I think rape would be if you were trying to push him off you and all you are saying to him is NO! However, I don't think you should have sex with him when you're not interested. You should help make the sex more interesting and special and ask him to help. He's not going to get creative and do something different all on his own.

Answer 5

To answer your question, "Can your boyfriend rape you?" the answer is yes. Sex turns into rape as soon as you say "no." Any time after you saying no is considered rape. But if you say no, but allow him even though you are not that into it, that is just not in the mood but going thru the motions. One thing I would suggest is for you to talk to him about this. Open communication is the key to a happy relationship. :)

Answer 6

Yes, sweetie your boyfriend can also rape you. If you say no and he caution to take of your clothes or pursuing you when you don't want to have sex, let call a spade a spade " HE IS RAPING YOU PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY" I understand that you have feeling for him but don't you want a boyfriend that will respect your decision not to have sex? If your answer is yes, then leave that BUM alone and find a Man that will love you, even when you do not want to open your legs.

Answer 7

Well me being a guy i can tell you it all depends on if you actually want it or not. If you never told him you do not want to have sex and be serious about it, it is not rape. It seems your are not interested in having sex with him anymore and in this situation you have to sit him down and talk about it.

Answer 8

Yeah, its not just boyfriends that can rape their girlfriends (date rape/ even if it is unknowingly) although you shouldn't use that word so lightly - even husbands can be accused of it (can you believe it?) - So, you need to set boundaries and talk to your boyfriend (unless you are being literally stripped and forced into it/ then it is just one-sided sex and not rape/ so choose your words carefully) - make sure he knows that 'No' is definitely 'No' and that you need to enjoy yourself to. He's a guy and he's an animal and he'd like nothing better than to shag your brains out without giving you a second thought. You need to remind him.

Answer 9

Yes, anyone can get raped by anyone. The key is that the actual act of sex has to be nonconsentual. If you say NO and he forces himself on you and makes you have sex against your will, this is rape. If you agree to have sex then it is not rape.

Answer 10

Yes your boyfriend can rape you, if you don't want it, and he forces himself on you then it is rape!
But does he know you feel like this? He may not think hes doing anything wrong. You need to talk to him!